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Gorging at the Trough


jglazer75

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OK,

I'll be the one to breach the subject because I'm sure most of y'all are too scared to actually admit that you're suckers for gluttony. But me, I LOVE the buffets and all-you-can-eat places. Luckily I manage to exercise on occassion, so it doesn't hit me too hard, but I LOVE 'em. I know they aren't healthy, but it's not like I go every day; and I'm not talking Country Kitchen here.

Anyway, when you are at one of these places (something like Fogo de Chao) what tricks to you use to cram more food in your gut? Throwing up doesn't count because, well it just ain't healthy, but all else goes. I've seen people get up and go to the bathroom (numbers 1 and 2). My favorite is jumping up and down in order compact the food. I've seen people eat quickly to get it in before they realize their too full. I've seen people mix food scientifically in a way that they think gets it all in.

So, what do y'all do? and as a side question, what places are best? I rank Fogo de Chao near the top.

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OK,

I'll be the one to breach the subject because I'm sure most of y'all are too scared to actually admit that you're suckers for gluttony. But me, I LOVE the buffets and all-you-can-eat places. Luckily I manage to exercise on occassion, so it doesn't hit me too hard, but I LOVE 'em. I know they aren't healthy, but it's not like I go every day; and I'm not talking Country Kitchen here.

Anyway, when you are at one of these places (something like Fogo de Chao) what tricks to you use to cram more food in your gut? Throwing up doesn't count because, well it just ain't healthy, but all else goes. I've seen people get up and go to the bathroom (numbers 1 and 2). My favorite is jumping up and down in order compact the food. I've seen people eat quickly to get it in before they realize their too full. I've seen people mix food scientifically in a way that they think gets it all in.

So, what do y'all do? and as a side question, what places are best? I rank Fogo de Chao near the top.

Good god, man! Step away from the chafing dish!

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The Argentinian steakhouses are pure protein loading .. and I like Fogo de Chao but have gone to others which were equally good ... so, that is for meat-loading but the all-you-can-eat buffets I learned about in college as an undergrad .. one near the U. of Illinois in Champaign-Urbana was at Rantoul AFB, a half-hour away .. friends taught us how to properly attack this mammoth buffet .. eat the expensive stuff first (seafood and meat) ... pass on the salads, avoid the soups, eschew the vegetables and breads .. this was long before Atkins, of course ... but we had to lie down in the backseat and unbuckle our belts (there were no seat belts back then!!) .. and the driver was designated by whom felt the least ill .. long time ago .. but now I simply go to the Brazilian places once in a while for old times sake ...

Melissa Goodman aka "Gifted Gourmet"

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Well, many, many years ago I had some co-workers that would go to the all-you-can-eat pizza for lunch and the method they would swear by for maximizing food ingestion is to not drink anything at all. I went once to witness (and partially experience) the gluttony and it was not pretty. Depending on how stuffed you have become - you absolutely cannot drink anything because if you do the food/bread will swell up and you will feel most uncomfortable...this may even be a health risk for all I know.

In line with GG's remarks - we also used to go to a mongolian barbeque place (not all you can eat) where you fill the bowl with your selections and then they cook it for you. My friends showed that you can double the height of the bowl by layering the sides with veggies - kind of how those steam inserts unfold and then filling it.

N.

"The main thing to remember about Italian food is that when you put your groceries in the car, the quality of your dinner has already been decided." – Mario Batali
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from my attempts at winning free t-shirts and or free meals based on eating disgusting amounts of food...

drink a lot of water a couple of hours beforehand - you'll be able to free up space as needed.

slouch. really. slump forward a little bit. I swear it makes being full more comfortable (or more accurately, sitting ramrod straight makes being full less comfortable).

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Never order sodas, no matter how thirsty you get, because it'll just take up valuable room in there. When the need arises, take small breaks and eat a small piece of acidic fruit to refresh your palate before attacking the mains again.

Like GG said, avoid starches if you can help it, but food at buffets can be on the salty side (they're so sneaky!). Only have sweets and desserts at the very end because sugary foods will hamper your performance.

Myself, I like to go slow and steady. I'm not a sprinter, but a marathoner.

Think of it as a competition. You don't go to buffets to enjoy yourself. You are not eating for sustenance. The buffet owners have arrogantly issued a challenge to you. They defy you to prove your eating ability. The only way to defend your honor is to show them what you are capable of.

Just like athletes, a successful buffet eater needs to have a conditioned body. It is important to maintain physical fitness, and to avoid building the Belt of Fat that can restrict the elasticity of your stomach area. Take a cue from the world of competitive eating where there's a recent trend towards competitors that weigh less than 150lbs.

Eating when you're hungry is easy. Eating when food disgusts you is hard.

As you probably already know, there will come a point when you are no longer able to enjoy the food. I like to the borrow a term from the long distance runner's vocabulary and call it The Wall. Know your own body and be prepared when you hit The Wall. Summon every last ounce of will in your body and break through it -- no, eat through it, brick by brick. How far you can advance past this point will ultimately be the measure of your success at the buffet.

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I'm in Brazil on business right now (actually come about once a month), and churrascarias are everywhere. And they are GOOD. I'm so spoiled on Brazilian beef that it's not even funny.

Anyway, being in a place where I'm presented with an ungodly amount of really fantastic food on a regular basis, I've had to develop some strategies for dealing with it in order to be able to fit in the one seat on the airplane back to the US. I started by watching my Brazilian comrades.

First... if it ain't good, don't bother. If a cut of beef doesn't wow my tongue off, I push it to the side and move on to the next one.

Second... I'll come up with a focus meat... chicken tonight, beef tomorrow night.

Third... eat slowly and savor the experience. If I don't scarf the piece of sirloin I'm enjoying so much, I won't have to eat 2 or 3 more right away to feel satisfied.

Fourth, and most important... drink plenty of caipirinhas.

...wine can of their wits the wise beguile, make the sage frolic, and the serious smile. --Alexander Pope

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