Culinary near-disasters

[jgm]

I don't remember another thread like this, but if there is one, the moderators are more than welcome to merge this into the old thread.

I recently made some manicotti for a co-worker. It was a very simple Weight Watchers recipe that I've made many times; it's remarkably good, so I decided to double it, and put some in our own freezer.

It took two trips to the grocery to finally get all the ingredients together. Or so I thought. After finishing the sauce, I realized I hadn't doubled the tomato sauce, but I had doubled the seasonings in it. I had only one more cup of tomato sauce, but needed 3. We had 5 inches of snow and ice on the ground, and no way was I going back to the store. So, in desperation, I took a can of whole tomatoes, whizzed them in the blender, and added that into the sauce, which went back on the stove for a few minutes to let the flavors meld a little.

To make things more manageable, I cooked only half the pasta at a time. I got the first batch put together; cheese mixture into the manicotti tubes, sauce over, packaged into plastic containers, and into the fridge for my friend. After a bit of a rough start, things were going well!

Of course not. That's when I realized I forgot to put the eggs into the filling. I was not about to try to reclaim the filling from the already-prepared shells, so I decided we'd eat those, and I took the rest of the filling, mixed the egg into it, and it was all fixed. I finished the batch and went to bed. Delivered it to the co-worker the next day.

So she comes to work this morning, and told me how grateful she was for the manicotti. "You're really quite the culinary artist, aren't you?" she said. I thanked her and tried to wipe the guilty look off my face. I see no reason why she needs to know the details...

So what pratfalls have you had in the kitchen that you were able to rescue, and no one was the wiser?

[srhcb]

Of course not.  That's when I realized I forgot to put the eggs into the filling.       I was not about to try to reclaim the filling from the already-prepared shells, so I decided we'd eat those, and I took the rest of the filling, mixed the egg into it, and it was all fixed.  I finished the batch and went to bed.  Delivered it to the co-worker the next day.

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I thought you were going to say you added the eggs for two batches of filling into the one!

SB (remember, before you start, always have your mice in place )

Edited December 4, 2006 by srhcb (log)

[moosnsqrl]

Hey, wait a minute . . . aren't you the one who is teaching someone else how to cook? Yikes!

I made banana bread last week (cheap, overripe bananas at the store made me forget temporarily that I don't bake). I filled the loaf pan and a muffin-crown pan with the remainder and everything seemed to go well. I removed the muffin crowns first, of course, since they don't have to bake nearly as long. When I finally took the bread out and turned it out onto a cooling rack, the top fell off and molten-hot liquid batter came oozing out. I guess I filled the loaf pan too full. I have to say, though, I scooped the hot gooey middle out and ate it and it was really good. Then I put the top back on and finished baking it the next morning and that was OK, too. So I wonder if I could duplicate it again if I tried, because it was kinda more enjoyable than just plain banana bread.

[miladyinsanity]

Hey, wait a minute . . . aren't you the one who is teaching someone else how to cook?  Yikes! 

I made banana bread last week (cheap, overripe bananas at the store made me forget temporarily that I don't bake).  I filled the loaf pan and a muffin-crown pan with the remainder and everything seemed to go well.  I removed the muffin crowns first, of course, since they don't have to bake nearly as long.  When I finally took the bread out and turned it out onto a cooling rack, the top fell off and molten-hot liquid batter came oozing out.  I guess I filled the loaf pan too full.  I have to say, though, I scooped the hot gooey middle out and ate it and it was really good.  Then I put the top back on and finished baking it the next morning and that was OK, too.  So I wonder if I could duplicate it again if I tried, because it was kinda more enjoyable than just plain banana bread.

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That's happened to me before!

I did the same thing too.

[jgm]

Hey, wait a minute . . . aren't you the one who is teaching someone else how to cook?  Yikes! 

I made banana bread last week (cheap, overripe bananas at the store made me forget temporarily that I don't bake).  I filled the loaf pan and a muffin-crown pan with the remainder and everything seemed to go well.  I removed the muffin crowns first, of course, since they don't have to bake nearly as long.  When I finally took the bread out and turned it out onto a cooling rack, the top fell off and molten-hot liquid batter came oozing out.  I guess I filled the loaf pan too full.  I have to say, though, I scooped the hot gooey middle out and ate it and it was really good.  Then I put the top back on and finished baking it the next morning and that was OK, too.  So I wonder if I could duplicate it again if I tried, because it was kinda more enjoyable than just plain banana bread.

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Yeah, I'm the one teaching someone to cook... In addition to "don't do as I do, do as I say", we're going to discuss the act of mise en place, plus the act of thinking about what you're doing, so if you screw up, you can figure out a way to fix it.

Your only problem, Judy, is that you lack creativity and imagination. You should have proclaimed your banana bread a "Molten Banana Muffin" and considered yourself a genius. Soon, molten muffins would be served far and wide, they'd be The Latest Thing, and it all would have started in your own kitchen!

[srhcb]

Once when I made small maraschino cherry quick breads they rose a little too much, and then fell in the centers. Worse yet, I couldn't get them out of the pans without breaking the tops off!

The tops did break off neatly along the pan rim though. I just used the frosting intended for the top to cement the pieces back together! The best part was the way a spot of frosting oozed through the hole on top where the centers had fallen. They were quite distinctive looking.

SB (like I'd intended this result all along! )

[moosnsqrl]

Your only problem, Judy, is that you lack creativity and imagination.    You should have proclaimed your banana bread a "Molten Banana Muffin" and considered yourself a genius.  Soon, molten muffins would be served far and wide, they'd be The Latest Thing,  and it all would have started in your own kitchen! 

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You underestimate me, jgm, I actually did try that ("you know, like the molten chocolate cake at XYZ") but they saw right through it. I did get the last laugh, though, having the 'good' part after they went to bed. Don't get mad, get even.

[LB Howes]

Several years my mother was visiting and I was baking a crumble topped apple pie for us to bring to a potluck. I needed to go out to run some errands, so my mother said she'd take it out of the oven when it was finished baking.

When I returned home, she met me at the door in tears. The pie had slipped out of her hands while she was taking it out of the oven and dropped onto the cooktop located beneath the oven (this was one of those old ranges with a small oven above and a large oven below the cooktop).

As the pie pan was metal there was no broken glass pie pan to contend with. I carefully lifted up the pan and discovered a perfect upside down pie with an intact crust. I put the pie pan back on the pie crust, then took two spatulas and carefully lifted up the pie shell and turned it right sideup back into the pan.

With a large serving spoon, I scooped up the still steaming hot apples and put them back in the crust. I then carefully lifted up the crumb topping with spatulas, turning sections of it right side up as I laid it on top of the apples. I did re-constructive surgery with a fork, lifting up the flat spots and mending cracks. Lastly, I trimmed up the tattered fluted edges of the crust with a small serrated knife. Voila! It was good to go.

The pie was very popular at the potluck and it all was eaten. No one could tell that there were a few extra steps taken in the preparation of this pie and we certainly didn't tell anyone.

[Kerry Beal]

My father used to sail in international races as chief cook and navigator. One day he made a cherry dessert with a crumb topping and as he was removing it from the oven they hit a large wave and it flipped onto the deck.

Compliments to his cooking - they called it 'cherry flip' and ate it with spoons right off the teak and holly.

[SuzySushi]

Oh, yeah, there was this lamb cake I baked one Easter, using a mold a friend had bought at a garage sale. When I umolded the cake, the head cracked off.

I cemented it back together with frosting, with a couple of judiciously-placed toothpicks, frosted and coconutted the whole cake, and no one was much the wiser.

After a second try using that cake mold didn't work, it went to the Goodwill pile.

[Reefpimp]

My father used to sail in international races as chief cook and navigator.  One day he made a cherry dessert with a crumb topping and as he was removing it from the oven they hit a large wave and it flipped onto the deck. 

Compliments to his cooking - they called it 'cherry flip' and ate it with spoons right off the teak and holly.

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"Why, you could eat off that deck!"

"Yes... yes you could...."

I dropped my sextant into a pot of marinara once, but no harm was done to either.