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I will never again . . . (Part 1)


Fat Guy

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Merrily make a delicious-looking souffle base with parmesan and the last bits of the stilton and herbs and perfectly, lovingly hand-whipped egg whites....

And belatedly realize that I have absolutely nothing appropriate to bake it in.

It made for some really good scrambled eggs though.

...that sounds delicious. Hmmm, I wonder if we have any eggs? :biggrin:

K (yes, this post was lame, but I had to show off my nifty-cool new avatar)

Basil endive parmesan shrimp live

Lobster hamster worchester muenster

Caviar radicchio snow pea scampi

Roquefort meat squirt blue beef red alert

Pork hocs side flank cantaloupe sheep shanks

Provolone flatbread goat's head soup

Gruyere cheese angelhair please

And a vichyssoise and a cabbage and a crawfish claws.

--"Johnny Saucep'n," by Moxy Früvous

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the ONE time in my entire adult life that i didnt break eggs into a seperate dish before dumping into the mixer, i cracked the egg and then, for reasons that will remain a mystery til i die, i tossed the shells in too!

this happened this past holiday season and it was the last batch of cookies i had to make, and i had used the last of the eggs and flour and sugar, it was the middle of the night, the nearest grocery store was closed, i was almost out of gas and the next nearest store was not near any gas stations..... so i went ahead and made the dough, rolled em out and then spent the next 4 hrs picking out egg shells.

never ever ever will i break eggs not into a seperate dish!

xo

"Animal crackers and cocoa to drink

That is the finest of suppers, I think

When I'm grown up and can have what I please,

I think I shall always insist upon these"

*Christopher Morley

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My sister tells a great story about when she had a young slave working for her in a resort kitchen. He was making a large cake for some VIP, and thought that if you threw the whole eggs into the mix, with their shells, and then really turned up the mixmaster that the shells would just pulverize into nothingness. After the VIP tasted the cake, my sister contemplated pulverizing the young slave. :laugh:

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the ONE time in my entire adult life that i didnt break eggs into a seperate dish before dumping into the mixer, i cracked the egg and then, for reasons that will remain a mystery til i die,  i tossed the shells in too!

this happened this past holiday season and it was the last batch of cookies i had to make, and i had used the last of the eggs and flour and sugar, it was the middle of the night, the nearest grocery store was closed, i was almost out of gas and the next nearest store was not near any gas stations.....  so i went ahead and made the dough, rolled em out and then spent the next 4 hrs picking out egg shells.

never ever ever will i break eggs not into a seperate dish!

xo

Sometimes the eggshell problem saves one from a larger mistake. My best friend and I were making a 12x batch of peanut butter cookies for the dorm bake sale in the college kitchen with the massive floor mixer. (I swear, you could wash a collie in that mixing bowl.) About the time Susan chastised me for not breaking eggs into a separate bowl and I was asking why not, I dropped a whole egg into the batter. As we were fishing out the bits of shell we started realizing the batter was very, very salty. "Uhm, Nancy? Where did you get the sugar?"

We were legendary by the next day.

Nancy Smith, aka "Smithy"
HosteG Forumsnsmith@egstaff.org

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"Every day should be filled with something delicious, because life is too short not to spoil yourself. " -- Ling (with permission)
"There comes a time in every project when you have to shoot the engineer and start production." -- author unknown

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My kid had a cold hard boilded egg that was hard to peel....thought if the egg was warmer...into the microwave....Hmmm...was that a gunshot I heard?

Its ok, we cleaned it up....gave my kid credit...great coverage.....

Mark

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:biggrin: I love this thread!! I have laughed so hard! My special favorite being the post about the frozen "fire hose" champagne! Beautiful!

I have to join the ranks of the noodles AND stock down the drain, as well as the grabbing the hot pan out of the oven, breaking the pizza stone, preheating the oven with stuff in it (plastic containers, birthday cakes, the list is endless!) etc...

My most painful was:

making stuffed peppers for my husband and as a treat I used poblanos instead of bell peppers. Now I know they are not THAT hot but I forgot completely that they weren't just plain ole bell peppers. I rubbed my eye and that was it. 15 minutes of flushing the eye with water did NOTHING and I was yelling and cursing like a sailor. A milk bath for my eye finally did the trick.

Never again. whew!

The stars above me are not real, they are the sparks from smitting steel - Michael Penn

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Here's a relatively recent dumbed down trick. I whacked my fingernail backwards Sunday afternoon. Yesterday I was fishing some venison pieces out of their marinade. You guessed it. Healed up that tender place under my nail with red wine vinegar THAT QUICK. Ouch, makes me shiver thinking about it!!!!!

[Moderator note: The original I will never again . . . topic became too large for our servers to handle efficiently, so we've divided it up; the preceding part of this discussion is here: I will never again . . . (Part 2)]

Edited by Mjx
Moderator note added. (log)
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