Jump to content
  • Welcome to the eG Forums, a service of the eGullet Society for Culinary Arts & Letters. The Society is a 501(c)3 not-for-profit organization dedicated to the advancement of the culinary arts. These advertising-free forums are provided free of charge through donations from Society members. Anyone may read the forums, but to post you must create a free account.

You might be a cocktail snob/geek if...


mbanu

Recommended Posts

You might be a cocktail snob if...

...you're disappointed when you walk into the local sports bar and the bartender isn't wearing a bow tie or arm garters.

...no bar in a 50 mile radius has all the ingredients to make your favorite drink.

...you buy 100-year-old bottles of bitters off the internet because you can't stand the taste of Angostura in your Old-Fashioneds.

:biggrin:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

You have to stop yourself from making a catty remark every time a friend orders a Cosmo. Which, in Manhattan, is not infrequently.

"We had dry martinis; great wing-shaped glasses of perfumed fire, tangy as the early morning air." - Elaine Dundy, The Dud Avocado

Queenie Takes Manhattan

eG Foodblogs: 2006 - 2007

Link to comment
Share on other sites

...you pay $20 for a drink at the Pegu Club that costs $3.50 anywhere else.

Rich Schulhoff

Opinions are like friends, everyone has some but what matters is how you respect them!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

...you're aghast that the bar you're in doesn't have a single jigger.

...you sniff your cocktails before sipping them.

...after looking at the back bar, you realize that there is not a single cocktail you'd want to order.

...you carry around a little bottle of bitters.

...you honestly can't understand why some people are spooked by egg white drinks, and think every cocktail bar should make them.

To interject a tiny bit of seriousness in an otherwise fun thread, I'm not convinced that "snob" is quite the right word. "Snob" has certain connotations of looking down on other people who are somehow "below you," whether that be due to education, socioeconomics, class, expertise, knowledge, etc. I don't think many of us look down on people who are not into cocktails the way we are. Rather, I think we tend to take the attitude that most everyone would become "one of us" once exposed to the real thing. I would rather call us "cocktail enthusiasts."

On the other side of the coin is what I would call "reverse snobbery," which is to say those who look down on spending $12 for a perfectly made cocktail or $19 a pound for prime beef because this seems like a snobbish affectation to them when (lesser) examples can be had for less money. Those who prefer quality are often accused of snobbery in this country.

--

Link to comment
Share on other sites

... you won't set foot in a bar with fewer than 12 different types of cocktail glasses.

... you bring your own olives because pimiento stuffed olives are so passe'.

I always attempt to have the ratio of my intelligence to weight ratio be greater than one. But, I am from the midwest. I am sure you can now understand my life's conundrum.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

this is killing me. "bartender? i'll have a hendricks martini, 4:1 with vya vermouth. do you have orange bitters for that? no, don't even look, i can tell you don't. here, i brought some, use mine. and are those... ? uh... you know what, i brought my own olives--you can just leave them in their plastic tub there..."

Link to comment
Share on other sites

...you first check out the back bar, then the bartender.

...you thought the bartender's attempt at making your cocktail was, "noble, but, flawed".

---

Erik Ellestad

If the ocean was whiskey and I was a duck...

Bernal Heights, SF, CA

Link to comment
Share on other sites

how about...

not only you bring your own bottle of bitters, you actually made the bitters in the bottle.

John Deragon

foodblog 1 / 2

--

I feel sorry for people that don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day -- Dean Martin

Link to comment
Share on other sites

You might be a cocktail geek if...

...you watch a bartender making a cocktail and know the date the version they make was published.

...the only bottles of liquor in your house are unopened because they're no longer made.

...you know the schedules of the bartenders you trust to make your drinks.

...you're reading this.

Edited by cocktailgeek (log)

Marcovaldo Dionysos

Cocktail Geek

cocktailgeek@yahoo.com

Link to comment
Share on other sites

interestingly enough I thought of the same thing a while back and almost posted a similar thread.

Granted I have to agree w/ slkinsey how ever assuming this post is all in fun.....

you watch the bar tender's every movement after he takes your drink order--including when you order fr/ a waiter at a table

certain bar tenders are glad to see you walk in to their bar & almost as happy as others are when they see you leave their bar.

you base where you are going to dinner on the type of vermouth they carry

you are actually concerned about what type of vermouth the bar uses

the waiter takes up more room on his pad writing your cocktail order than your dinner order

you use ratios when placing your cocktail order

other patrons are watching the cocktail waitress w/ the incredible figure and you are watching the bar tender to make certain that he uses the gin you requested

you have been "invited" behind the bar to mix your own cocktail

you have gone behind the bar to mix your own cocktail

you have been "invited" to leave the bar after going behind the bar to mix your own cocktail

you have Fee Brothers on your speed dial

the young lady who answers the telephone recognizes your voice

all she has to say is, "the usual order?"

you have a ten minute conversation w/ her about your respective families

you have been stopped at customs b/c of tree bark you brought in to the country

you have actually used the phrase, "but Guffy says...."

in loving memory of Mr. Squirt (1998-2004)--

the best cat ever.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

... you have a preference for flame or unflamed orange peels

... blend 2 or more vermouths of the same variety in one drink

... start raising hens because the eggs at the market arent fresh enough for your drinks

... have asked a bartending to pass you the shaker so you can shake it your self after watching him/her give your drink only 2 shakes

... have hung your head in shame after your friend/date orders a grey goose and soda at Pegu

... started your own import business because what's currently available in your country doesn't meet your standards

... cross state/national borders for the sole purpose of obtaining liquor

... give your traveling friends detailed descriptions, pictures, and directions to specific liquor stores abroad when they ask if you want any souvenirs

... have walked out of a bar because they didn't have any bitters

... have been asked by other bar patrons if you work there after giving a long, unasked for, history lesson on the origins of the cocktail they're drinking

Link to comment
Share on other sites

-some friends won't sit at a bar with you because of the pained noises you make when the bartender does somthing unprofessional.

-some friends just look at you when bartenders ask for their drink order.

-you can't stop from cringing when some one orders an extra dry vodka martini, dirty.

You feel your gorge rise when you hear some one order a "Goose and red bull, and tuff it up eh chief?"

You choose vacations based on what spirit the country produces.

you've had bartenders invite you to thier homes, for drinks, not just to look at their etchings.

you prefer to eat dinner at the bar.

There is more than one bartender who can start pouring your drink as soon as you walk into the bar, so it's sitting prettily on a bev nap by the time your butt hits the bar stool.

A DUSTY SHAKER LEADS TO A THIRSTY LIFE

Link to comment
Share on other sites

sorry for the duplicates, but here are mine

...you specify the number of ice cubes in your drink

...you'd rather not drink than have what is being served

...you tell someone else when the bartender short pours THEIR drink

reading everyone else's post's, i realize that i am a snob, and unabashed about it

d

Link to comment
Share on other sites

You might be a cocktail geek if...

...you watch a bartender making a cocktail and know the date the version they make was published.

...the only bottles of liquor in your house are unopened because they're no longer made.

...you know the schedules of the bartenders you trust to make your drinks.

...you're reading this.

... or you call ahead to make sure your favorite bt's will be working :wink:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

×
×
  • Create New...