Annoyance du jour: don't bring YOUR food in here!

[Karen Anderson]

Seattle has a few alternatives to the pig-trough concession stands, and I head for those theaters: The old Egyptian has a inexpensive shabby-chic espresso bar with a 1960s-beatnik feel to it. The renovated Majestic in Ballard has the basic theater food, but in human-size portions and for very reasonable prices.

Another glimmer of hope: The fancy new theaters at the Alderwood Mall in the mega-burb north of Seattle have a Starbucks, with standard Starbucks prices. So, the prices are not cheap but the food/drink you get for your money is pretty good (Earl Grey tea and some shortbread? I'm not complaining). Wish more theaters would partner with Starbucks or the upscale places that are starting to turn up at the newer airport terminals so we we'd have nosh choices beyond nachos with melted yellow petrochemicals.

[Tess]

The Landmark theaters in the Chicago area-- which show one of the best selections of movies-- have coffee drinks and popcorn with real butter, and even some pretty good sprinkle-on flavorings for the popcorn. A nice selection of candy too.

What I would really like, though, and don't have nearby is a theater that serves beer and wine. I'm not usually looking to have much food during a movie anyway; I'd rather eat before or after.

[judiu]

I almost always buy popcorn at a movie.  How can you not buy theatre popcorn??

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And those sizes? Almost like Starbucks .. the smallest is swimming pool sized and the largest is football field sized ... Oh, you want butter on that? and a small dump truck arrives to pour the melted butter on top ...

and the prices? should a box of jujubes really require a small bank loan??

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Oh, if only it WERE real butter!

[eJulia]

Best story ever on food brought in to a theatre: My friend AmishRobot's: Angst in my pants. It's the first on his list of favorites. I laughed so hard when I read this post! AmishRobot

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OMG.. that is so funny, I still have tears streaming down my face!

[jgm]

We ALWAYS sneak food into the theater. Usually it's candy bars; my husband often brings (candy) orange slices, and I sometimes bring caramels. But we've been known to do cookies and other things. I've tried coffee, but I can't find a thermos small enough to fit in my coat, but well enough made that it actually keeps the coffee hot. My next coat, as a matter of fact, will be chosen with regard to what the pockets can hold.

The straw that broke the camel's back was when I paid almost $7 for popcorn, only to realize it was a bucket of crumbs. Until then, we often paid the ridiculous prices for whatever looked good at the concession stand.

One of our theaters has seats with extra room between rows, to allow waitstaff to pass through. They have a full menu, and we can order before and all through the movie, without getting up from our chairs. When the theater first opened, the food was pretty good, but now it's barely edible. We have to be in the right mood to go --and usually that means we had a really good lunch. We rarely, if ever, sneak anything into this theater.

Our favorite, however, is the drive-in. We try to go once every summer, and we'll usually bring fresh hot pizza and our own popcorn. The concession stand has a marvelous array of junk foods, including ice cream, and it's basically just an evening-long pig-out. Memories are made of this!

[Adrienne Carmack]

When my friends and I were about 14 years old, one of my friends would always sneak in a bag of potato chips under her shirt. She certainly looked pregnant with it, but no one questioned her.

These days, I always eat before and I like to make sure my bladder is completely empty before going in. I don't think I could enjoy a beer at a movie. I'm one of those people who hates movie interruptions - I like to hear every word and I don't want to have to leave to use the restroom!

[Pookie]

We are very lucky as our theatre is both right across the road from our house and is located above both the 24 hour Grocery store and the bulk food store.

I have taken my dessert to go from dinner and enjoyed it during the movie after.

[purplewiz]

I really don't enjoy eating during a movie - I find it distracting. If I do get something to eat, I either wolf it down in the first 10 minutes of the movie to get it out of the way, or end up with it unopened by the end of the film. I'd rather eat before or afterwards.

But I have to admit I liked the coffee bar at the last theater we went to - they had a wonderful selection of sugar free syrups, and for some reason I really enjoyed sipping the coffee where I wouldn't have enjoyed snacking.

Marcia.

[tmgrobyn]

Best story ever on food brought in to a theatre: My friend AmishRobot's: Angst in my pants. It's the first on his list of favorites. I laughed so hard when I read this post! AmishRobot

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OMG.. that is so funny, I still have tears streaming down my face!

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eJulia - that's exactly how I saw it. Funniest story on the web! I'm glad you liked it.

[rachel!]

I love popcorn but for health reasons avoid the movie-theater sort. So if the movie's not too close to a meal we'll pop up a bowl in the microwave (there's this great bowl that air-pops in the microwave with no added butter or anything) and add some of the flavored seasonings (or a mix of sugar and cinnamon, mmm). I have a special 'movie purse' big enough to hold the bag of popcorn and drinks for everyone, plus my regular purse. No way am I going to pay $3 for a bottle of water when I can fill one for fractions of pennies at home!

I had a friend in college whose family was famous for what they snuck into the theater -- once she went with her uncle, who brought a whole rack of ribs.

[racheld]

I had a friend in college whose family was famous for what they snuck into the theater -- once she went with her uncle, who brought a whole rack of ribs.

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Our HERO and FOUNDER!!!! What a guy!!!

I HATE purses. Haven't carried one since about 1986. I just stick a lipstick in my left pocket, a couple of cards and ID in the right (in a handy little plastic Ziploc), hang my reading glasses in the neck of my shirt, and I'm good to go.

My best smuggle was a couple of years ago. We had stopped at a fastfood place for a bite of lunch, then headed off to the movie. We always hit the drink dispenser for a little topoff before leaving those places, and so we had two nice medium Dr. Peppers in the cupholder in the car.

As we got out of the car to go buy our tickets, I said to heck with it...why buy their nine-dollar sugarwater when these perfectly good drinks will be melted and practically boiling when we come back to this hot car.

So I stood between the car and a van and carefully inserted one drink into each side pocket. The chilly cups alongst my thighsides felt kind of nice on the trip to the door, as I walked casually past ticketstand, ticket ripper and concession.

Then, came a wee problem. How to extract those two flimsy cups from my pants without catching the straws, popping off the tops, or anointing myself embarrassingly from hip to toe in sticky drink. I walked carefully into the ladies' room, past the big wall of mirrors, catching sight of my streetcar-wide hips and thinking that I could have taken my place in Marie Antoinette's entourage with those huge side-panniers I was sporting...all I needed was the big hair.

I closed myself into a stall, reached to the right, painfully extracted one cup with my fingertips. Then, where to set it, cause I needed both hands. The little metal box on the wall had a slopy top, so I had to set it there, sort of back my bottom up to it and hold it in place whilst I tried to get that lefthand cup (now chillingly becoming painful) off my left hip.

I reached gingerly into the pocket, and felt the "pop" of the lid as it disengaged from the cup. Now trying to play a bizarre game of Twister in a stall too small to turn around successfully, I managed to get top and straw out , stick the straw between my teeth, and waiting every moment for that chill flood of Pepper down my leg, I stood in a sidewise Mummenschantz posture, gently held the rim of the cup, and pulled upward in a careful manner befitting a member of the bomb squad in full padding.

It slid free, I managed to snap lid on cup, rotate myself toward the butt-held drink, retrieve it, and exit the stall. To the fascinated stares of two elderly ladies who were obviously in great wonderment of how I managed to tend to the order of bathroom things whilst holding two full cups. Or what was in them.

But Uncle Rack of Ribs takes the prize.

Welcome, RACHEL!!!!

edit spell

Edited February 21, 2006 by racheld (log)

[I_call_the_duck]

About 10 years ago, there was an interesting article in the NYT about the food that people sneak into movie theatres. Ushers who clean the theatre after each feature found things including fast food wraps, Chinese take-out containers, and sushi.

These days, the most I sneak into movies is bottled water and maybe a candy bar. When I was in college, my friend and I once brought in tuna sandwiches, wine coolers (hey, it was the 80s), and popcorn. For some reason, I never remember how much tuna can smell. I thought we'd surely be busted once we opened up the wrappers, but we made it through.

[Melanger]

Here in Las Vegas many of the movie theatres are in casinos so all of the usual casino accoutrements are available plus some bonus extras in the more local joints.

The Green Valley Ranch has a Fatburger in the foodcourt area (conveniently located next the the escalator to the movies) which makes a visit to watch the new flick of the week much more enjoyable. Stash two cans of beer and life is beautiful.

The Orleans has a liquor store inside the casino which is the perfect place to pick up a pocket size bottle of rum. You can saunter up to the theatre, take a run through the concession line, grab a coke, plop down and get soused for the price of two cocktails at the bar. All of which makes really bad movies oh so much better. And the nickels slots after oh so much more fun.

[Lilija]

I used to have a leather jacket, a standard biker jacket, that was perfect for movie trips. The inside pocket's lining was ripped, giving me access to the whole coat. My entire coat became a container.

During this time, I also worked at a convenience store/deli.

We'd go to the movies, often, as a huge group. If I wasn't working, prior, we would always make a special stop at the store. I would aquire bags of candy, the 1lb size, and line my coat with them. 20 oz bottles of soda fit neatly down one sleeve, only crowding my arm a little. Subs, I could get 6 inch subs into the pocket, and settled around the hem, nicely. Sure the wrapper was a little beat up...but there's something deliciously evil about eating a giant Italian sub, during a movie.

I miss my coat of holding. It doesnt fit anymore, sadly. Too many pounds of candy, and Italian subs, probably.

Now, I just sneak in candy and bottles of water. We buy popcorn, because I'm pretty addicted to theater popcorn, yellow non-butter goop, and all.

[Kouign Aman]

I will smuggle in a bottle of water, and cherries. One bag full of freshly washed cherries, and another for the pits. Much better than popcorn for watching movies. Shame they arent available year round!

[Kris]

I most certainly do sneak in my own food to movie theaters. I hate buying movie theater popcorn and concessions.

I usually sneak in bottled water. Sometimes candy too. But on occasion I've even snuck in cold cut sandwiches and chips.

Last weekend I was taking my 7 year old niece to see Curious George. She loves movie popcorn, soda and other theater crap. But I refuse to pay $10 for a small popcorn and small soda.

So I told her we'd get snacks at the local deli before entering the theater.

I then got a lecture about how you're not supposed to bring outside food into the theater and that "it's against the law auntie." So I said in a snippy tone, "Fine, we won't get any snacks then."

And I didn't buy her one damn thing in that movie theater either.

Edited February 21, 2006 by Kris (log)

[judiu]

When I was a kid, there was a candy store about two doors down from our "usual" theatre with real hand dipped chocolates and other goodies. I'd buy their stuff every time! Tasted better, was fresher and the woman who worked there really liked me, so MY quarter pound was closer to six ounces than four!

[Chris Amirault]

Best story ever on food brought in to a theatre: My friend AmishRobot's: Angst in my pants. It's the first on his list of favorites. I laughed so hard when I read this post! AmishRobot

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Indeed it is! We all should use the phrase "Sour Patch death-sugar" more often, don't you think?

[petite tête de chou]

I don't ever recall bringing my own munchies to a theatre. The popcorn was fine until I wanted to maintain a "girlish" figure but I still bought junior mints or sweet tarts. Now, the drive-in was a whole 'nother story. First, partake of your organic, green cigarettes and then break out the orange fantas, root beers, super-buttery, chili/garlic powder/tabasco-laced popcorn, pepperoni and beef jerky. Ice-cream bon-bons and hot-dogs steamed in foil were bought during the much needed, yet paranoic, bathroom trip.

[sazji]

When I was a kid they weren't so strict about things. I remember being really embarassed as we stood in line to see "Jungle Book," each carrying a brown grocery sack full of popcorn made by my thrifty Greek-American mom. (Now there's no reason to buy that expensive popcorn when you can have better popcorn cheaper from home!) Yeah, she was right of course but it just wasn't cool!

The weirdest thing I (along with friends) snuck into a movie theatre was baked sweet potatoes. I don't remember what the film was but I remember us sitting there eating really good warm sweet potatoes.

[Toasted]

I can't find it but wasn't there a thread about this? And people claiming that by bringing in our own food we were "stealing the movie theater's profits"? I can never find anything so Google Masters: Go!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Gifted Gourmet]

Just located a very timely article from Slate online:

The Popcorn Palace Economy

Theater chains, in fact, are in three different businesses.

First, they are in the fast-food business, selling popcorn, soda, and other snacks. This is an extremely profitable operation in which the theaters do not split the proceeds with the studios (as they do with ticket sales). Popcorn, for example, because of the immense amount of popped bulk produced from a relatively small amount of kernels—the ratio is as high as 60:1—yields more than 90 cents of profit on every dollar of popcorn sold. It also serves to make customers thirsty for sodas, another high-margin product (supplied to most theater chains by Coca-Cola, which makes lucrative deals with theater owners in return for their exclusive "pouring" of its products). One theater chain executive went so far as ...

do yourself a favor and read on .. quite appropriate for this thread ....

[Sugarella]

Interesting article by Mr. Epstein; thanks for the link, GG.

I can add one more..... theatres are no longer cleaned/swept between showings to cut costs. Remember when there used to be at least 1/2 hour between films? I can remember as a kid buying our tickets and having to wait in the lobby until the theatre was ready again, even though the previous film had already let out.

I knew about the tricks with the bulbs and slowing the projectors, and with projectionists running up to 8 films at a time.... but I wonder, are projectionists in the US unionized? Not theatre workers, just projectionists. Does anybody know? Up here they are, and there are some hefty severance packages being doled out as things are going digital. At least now with the advance of digital media we'll get to see the films again as the studio intended, without jumps and flashes with every reel change.

Back to topic..... I'd forgotten, but when I was a kid my Dad used to take us to dinner first and we'd smuggle our desserts into the theatre wrapped in napkins in our pockets......

[chocomoo]

People who live/have lived in Hong Kong should really chime in on this. My mom tells me that they used to bring dried squid into the theatre, and (my memory's sketchy on this) even roast pork! Apparently, Hong Kong theatres sell sweet popcorn, not the buttery, so-salty-it-cures-your-lips popcorn.

I've never gotten into the habit of getting anything from the concession stand. We hardly went out to see movies when we were kids (I think I saw "Rainbow Brite" and "Care Bears in Wonderland") & even then, concession stand food was too expensive. Nowadays I bring bottled water or a box of Vita lemon tea (it's sooo much better than other commercial brands like American bottled Lipton and Nestea) to drink. Usually nothing to eat (too hard to stash away!).

Slightly off-topic, but I'm pretty sure one of our older theatres here still uses film reels. During "Cinderella Man", the screen suddenly went blank, with the sound still playing. Ok, maybe a slight glitch, I thought - it'll be back to normal in a few seconds. Nope! The audience sat in rapture as the edges of the film starting bubbling, and the black bubbles slowly munched their way into the centre of the screen until even the sound disintegrated All I can say is, the first half of Cinderella Man was good!

[tmgrobyn]

Best story ever on food brought in to a theatre: My friend AmishRobot's: Angst in my pants. It's the first on his list of favorites. I laughed so hard when I read this post! AmishRobot

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Indeed it is! We all should use the phrase "Sour Patch death-sugar" more often, don't you think?

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Excellent phrasology!