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"I want a Krispy donut!"


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Wow! I suddenly remembered one I used to do when I was a kid. For ages I would pronounce 'Neapolitan' as 'Nepalition.' I was usually pretty good at pronouncing words but for some reason I always got stuck on saying that incorrectly.

"Fat is money." (Per a cracklings maker shown on Dirty Jobs.)
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Early signs that I was a foody:

1) I really did think the line was "Sleep in heavenly peas."

2) I pronounced mausoleum as if it were a table spread, with the accent on the o.

3) There was a corner store/deli in our neighborhood called "Tak-Ome" foods (at least I think that's how the name was written; that was a long time ago.) I thought it was a Japanese food store, couldn't figure out why there was no Japanese food.

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[...]I always called it Woostershire...until I married a man from Worchester...the tauting was endless and I finally learned to say it right.

How do they pronounce it?

I always pronounced it to rhyme with booster...Wooster. And Shire the obvious way, just like it is written.

It's actually supposed to sound like wuss...Wuss-ta

Shire should sound like sure...or Shure.

So it's either Wuss-ta for the town, or Wuss-ta Shure for the area.

This from a nation with villages called Lower Piddle, Upper Piddle and Piddle-through-the-Hole.

Don't try to win over the haters. You're not the jackass whisperer."

Scott Stratten

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My friend used to make me order her Whoppers at BK because she didnt like maymonaise on them...and couldnt say mayonaise.

Husband calls milk cow squeezins.....

tracey

The great thing about barbeque is that when you get hungry 3 hours later....you can lick your fingers

Maxine

Avoid cutting yourself while slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold them while you chop away.

"It is the government's fault, they've eaten everything."

My Webpage

garden state motorcyle association

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When my sister was a kid, hamburgers were hang-a-burgers

Among my husband's university crowd, if someone suggested "firing up the bitch", well a trip to Wendy's was in order

And my cousin couldn't pronounce "dr", so in the summer would often come rushing into the house, all hot from playing, yelling "I need a shrink!"

**Melanie**

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One of my children called Burger King Burgerdeath. Had a friend who said, "swimps" for shrimp and "candyams" for that those good ole' southern baked sweet potatoes mashed up and swimming in butter, raisens, sugar and topped off with marshmellows. Said she was "going to make groceries" when she went to the store. Our kids would then began to say this when they had to go to the bathroom!

Lemingaide was another .. and gramaw would say "krep-a-lock" for kreploch.

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I knew someone who pronounced vinegar as "vig-nar" and cinnamon as "cimmanim". She also botched spaghetti, to the classic "pasketti" which makes me nuts.

When I was little, it was Booger King and Windys.

When I got a little older, it was Taco Hell, and Funkin Gonuts.

I had a friend that pronounce sandwich as "sangweech" I use 'sammich' quite frequently.

Finally, I got into the habit, due to an old Far Side comic, of calling food "fud". Anyone seen that cartoon? Has a dog hiding behind a dryer door, with signs pointing into the dryer, saying "Cat Fud" with a cat walking down some steps.

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When I was a kid, Jack-in-the-Box was either Gag-in-the-Bag or Jacques (to make it sound spiffier than it was...like calling Target stores "Tar-zhay").

 

“Peter: Oh my god, Brian, there's a message in my Alphabits. It says, 'Oooooo.'

Brian: Peter, those are Cheerios.”

– From Fox TV’s “Family Guy”

 

Tim Oliver

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One word: "Snausages!"

That dorky little commercial from the 80s warped my fragile little mind. I'm an adult and I still say it. Hell, my fiancee and I are both Italian-American, and we BOTH say it!

"Give me 8 hours, 3 people, wine, conversation and natural ingredients and I'll give you one of the best nights in your life. Outside of this forum - there would be no takers."- Wine_Dad, egullet.org

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One word: "Snausages!"

That dorky little commercial from the 80s warped my fragile little mind. I'm an adult and I still say it. Hell, my fiancee and I are both Italian-American, and we BOTH say it!

For years after that commercial for Underwood meat spreads in which the little kid said "borgashmord", my family jokingly called any kind of buffet-type array of food by that name.

(We also couldn't help but notice that the kid in those ads bore a striking resemblance to one of my cousins. Thankfully, once said cousin hit puberty he also hit a king-hell growth spurt, eventually transforming from little pudgy kid with mop of red hair to tall skinny beanpole...with mop of red hair. No recollection as to whether he ever had problems pronouncing smorgasbord. :smile: )

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Two come to mind: my bride has always called the bigger than bay shrimp "prongs" ....

And my camping friends and I refer to Spaghettio-s as "Culo de pesci con pomodoro" -- I needn't translate.

:raz:

"Cogito Ergo Dim Sum; Therefore I think these are Pork Buns"

hvrobinson@sbcglobal.net

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The more I think about it, more pop into my head.

My husband and I, after watching The Birdcage one too many times, now always refer to shrimp as "CHRIMPS!" exclamation point, always.

Same thing with butter. We stayed at these people's houses, and the husband was a little crazy. The wife asked him to put the butter on the table, and on his way into the kitchen, he was yelling "BUTTER!" all shrill, in this falsetto. We were beside ourselves. Now, every time someone says butter, it's a reflex to yell "BUTTER!" in a falsetto. Not erroneous, just goofy.

We call milk "Moo" and chicken breasts "Chicky boobs".

My stepmom pronounces worcestershire sauce "wOOster sauce" she really emphasizes that OO, to the point that her eyes bug out, every time. It's hysterical. I don't think she knows it.

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Our oldest Granddaughter and her Mom lived with us for a couple of years during her toddlerhood. She loved the Chinese restaurant just around the block, and we went there for dinner quite often. I'd load up a baggie with her spoon, bib and sippy-cup, he'd pick her up, and we'd "walk out" the back gate and have our dinner.

In fact, her first sentence I ever heard, at about 18 months, referred to her Grandfather and her wishes to go out that evening. We were sitting on the back patio; she was twirling a pretty red-and-white umbrella over her head, singing and dancing, and suddenly she pointed. "Ganner go gate. I eat noodles."

I called him on his cell and told him we had dinner plans.

THEN she discovered the ice cream machine. Chris is fond of Coke Floats, so his dessert was always a glass with a squirt of the soft-serve, topped by a foamy portion of Coke from the handy machine. He made her first one in a tiny ceramic condiment cup, a tablespoon of ice cream and a mere whisper of Coke. She spooned it up, was satisfied with her portion, and we went home.

Things continued as usual: dinner, Coke Float, home, for several trips. Then one evening she was impatient for her treat. He got up for another item from the buffet, and she called out for all to hear: "Don't forget my Flote Lote, Ganner!"

So Flote Lote it is, though she is old enough now to go and prepare her own, AND that of her tiny sister, who gets the wee cup and spoon.

And we still suggest a trip to the restaurant with, "Wanna Go Gate?"

Edited by racheld (log)
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My husband and I, after watching The Birdcage one too many times, now always refer to shrimp as "CHRIMPS!" exclamation point, always.

:laugh: We do that too, as well as yelling "EEES A STEW!" whenever one of us mentions a stewy stype substance. Damn you Hank Azaria!

This marriage is gonna be freaky-deaky, ain't it? :wub:

"Give me 8 hours, 3 people, wine, conversation and natural ingredients and I'll give you one of the best nights in your life. Outside of this forum - there would be no takers."- Wine_Dad, egullet.org

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Pachelbel's popular (and somewhat overplayed) masterpiece is known in our household as the: "Taco Bell Cannon."

Sitting on the fence between gourmet and gourmand, I am probably leaning to the right...

Lyle P.

Redwood City, CA

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Finally, I got into the habit, due to an old Far Side comic, of calling food "fud".  Anyone seen that cartoon? Has a dog hiding behind a dryer door, with signs pointing into the dryer, saying "Cat Fud" with a cat walking down some steps.

That has got to be one of my favorite Far Side cartoons. In fact, my catch-all folder is labeled “fud.” My husband hasn't gotten to the habit of saying it, but knows what I mean when I do, and my brother says "fud" too.

We call breakfast "brittit", because that's what my husband said when he was a kid.

Some of our best food malapropisms comes from misspellings that we encounter on signs or menus. Such as “mapple” when we saw a sign for “Mapple Turkey Breast”, or “dumpings” when we saw “Shrimp Dumping in Noodle Soup” on a menu.

Karen C.

"Oh, suddenly life’s fun, suddenly there’s a reason to get up in the morning – it’s called bacon!" - Sookie St. James

Travelogue: Ten days in Tuscany

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Our oldest Granddaughter and her Mom lived with us for a couple of years during her toddlerhood.  She loved the Chinese restaurant just around the block, and we went there for dinner quite often.  I'd load up a baggie with her spoon, bib and sippy-cup, he'd pick her up, and we'd "walk out" the back gate and have our dinner. 

In fact, her first sentence I ever heard, at about 18 months, referred to her Grandfather and her wishes to go out that evening.  We were sitting on the back patio; she was twirling a pretty red-and-white umbrella over her head, singing and dancing, and suddenly she pointed.  "Ganner go gate.  I eat noodles."

I called him on his cell and told him we had dinner plans.

THEN she discovered the ice cream machine.  Chris is fond of Coke Floats, so his dessert was always a glass with a squirt of the soft-serve, topped by a foamy portion of Coke from the handy machine.  He made her first one in a tiny ceramic condiment cup, a tablespoon of ice cream and a mere whisper of Coke.  She spooned it up, was satisfied with her portion, and we went home.

Things  continued as usual:  dinner, Coke Float, home, for several trips.  Then one evening she was impatient for her treat.    He got up for another item from the buffet, and she called out for all to hear:  "Don't forget my Flote Lote, Ganner!"

So Flote Lote it is, though she is old enough now to go and prepare her own, AND that of her tiny sister, who gets the wee cup and spoon.

And we still suggest a trip to the restaurant with, "Wanna Go Gate?"

This is an adorable story, and it made me smile, and think about my little one at that age, with all his awesome terminology...but the "chik'n tit and a TAYUB" story, that previously occupied this spot had me laughing out loud, for sure.

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I've loved reading all these, but didn't think I had one.

Till today, when I was reminded that I do.

Friday afternoon - a treat for the kids - going through the drive-through at Taco Bell. (Yeah, okay, someone come and hit me with a piece of limp cabbage and a soba noodle. I deserve it.)

Trying to place the order, trying to remember everything while the children are trying to tell each other how fantastic they each are and how rotten the other one is in the back seats, I ordered the wrong drink for my son.

There was silence and then in the quiet where one only heard the crackling of the "order window" as they waited, my eleven year old son cried loudly in a desperate tone from the back seat: "DOCTOR PECKER!"

I tried not to laugh but it was impossible. Gasping for breath (not the first time for something wierd often happens to us at drive-throughs) through my bursts of laughter, I apologized to the order taker and asked to change the order. To Doctor Pepper.

No, we don't want no Doctor Pecker, thank you.

:laugh:

I swear I don't teach him these things.

........................................................................

Another one: In the spirit of multiculturalism (I guess) he always calls chicken pot pies "chicken chop ping". It adds a wonderful level of elegance to the thing. :rolleyes:

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