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ITV cooking program - Chef Versus Britain


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Don't plan your meal until you have met your guests, some people scored poorly because they had a vegetarian and didn't cater to them, other people expressed dislikes/allergies of certain ingredients only for people to serve them the next night. Result - nil points.

I do agree that the show is entertaining but not in a serious foodie sort of way. I actually felt sorry for the people who could cook because it obviously counted for so little. The winner was always the person with the personality acceptable to the most people - only occasionally was that the person with the best food.

hmmm... doesn't that mean the person to go first is at the most disadvantage?

hmm... i better go last then.

but screw it!!! the last two shows I've been on restricted what i could cook!! ggrrr!!! :angry:

might just forget the prize as not going to win anyway

i'm not funny / charming enough to win a popularity contest

if I was, would have gone for big brother :raz:

Yeah just going to stick to my menu, i won't win but at least the food i cook will look gorgeous!! have a look I've been busy

http://forums.egullet.org/index.php?showtopic=63534&st=60

naturally if i get to go last will adapt the menu to at least look ike i'm trying.

"so tell me how do you bone a chicken?"

"tastes so good makes you want to slap your mamma!!"

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:wacko: yes i am a recipient of care in the community

but this is a food forum. :raz:

yep

kiwi vinaigrette and raw rock shrimps

tastes really nice

1 ripe peeled kiwi fruit

2 Tbsp rice vinegar

1/2 Tbsp sugar

1/2 tsp mirin

pinch of salt

blend it alltogether and pour on shrimps

make sure the shrimp are sashimi grade.

Its works like ceviche does.

If you adventurous enough give it a try.

If you don't like it...

Tough! :raz:

"so tell me how do you bone a chicken?"

"tastes so good makes you want to slap your mamma!!"

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:wacko: yes i am a recipient of care in the community

but this is a food forum.  :raz:

yep

kiwi vinaigrette and raw rock shrimps

tastes really nice

1 ripe peeled kiwi fruit

2 Tbsp rice vinegar

1/2 Tbsp sugar

1/2 tsp mirin

pinch of salt

blend it alltogether and pour on shrimps

make sure the shrimp are sashimi grade.

Its works like ceviche does.

If you adventurous enough give it a try.

If you don't like it...

Tough!  :raz:

Err, No thanks. Kiwi fruit belongs in one thing only and that's the bin. It's in my room 101 with physalis and starfruit. I hope they're happy together.

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I should know the outcome either later today or Monday so I'll post an update then.

Not being invited to do the pilot. Aparently it was nothing to do with the fact that I'm a miserable old git who hadn't bothered shaving for the audition, appreared to be barely half awake and moaned on about how TV cookery shows were better in the old days, they just decided on someone else. However, if the show is commissioned, the producer has promised to call me back. (I'll be waiting by the telephone with baited breath as you can imagine).

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bit extreme.

Fruit is like knowledge its only a tool that can be used for good and evil.

Its not kiwi or starfruit's fault for being adopted as the weapon of choice by style over content chefs and as a garnish its better then a sprig of parsely n'est pas?

anyhoo kiwi and starfruit are nice to eat unlike parsley

"so tell me how do you bone a chicken?"

"tastes so good makes you want to slap your mamma!!"

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Masterchef goes large is getting on my tits now. I couldn't help feeling that the insinuation tonight was that the aristocracy have the finest pallets.

I felt sorry for Christopher when they criticised the dish he had cooked, the fact that the chicken mousse was overpowered was hardly his fault - he didn't conceive the dish.

Overall I can't stop watching this but I don't think the judges know what they want, they seem to be making it up as they go along. People get criticised for making things too simple, then criticised for being too ambitious and then they'll praise the next person for keeping it simple?!?!? :wacko:

I also can't help feeling that the standard is nowhere near as good as the original masterchef. How long did they all cook that mallard for? Overall there has barely been a person that has been able to cook a piece of meat to a decent standard.

"Why would we want Children? What do they know about food?"

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Masterchef goes large is getting on my tits now. I couldn't help feeling that the insinuation tonight was that the aristocracy have the finest pallets.

I felt sorry for Christopher when they criticised the dish he had cooked, the fact that the chicken mousse was overpowered was hardly his fault - he didn't conceive the dish.

Overall I can't stop watching this but I don't think the judges know what they want, they seem to be making it up as they go along. People get criticised for making things too simple, then criticised for being too ambitious and then they'll praise the next person for keeping it simple?!?!? :wacko:

I also can't help feeling that the standard is nowhere near as good as the original masterchef. How long did they all cook that mallard for? Overall there has barely been a person that has been able to cook a piece of meat to a decent standard.

Here here......

I went into a French restaraunt and asked the waiter, 'Have you got frog's legs?' He said, 'Yes,' so I said, 'Well hop into the kitchen and get me a cheese sandwich.'

Tommy Cooper

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Masterchef the cooking gameshow where you win if you can read the judges mind.

Should be interesting to see how john and gregs tv careers progress after this.

I hope they aren't the judges for the next series.

"so tell me how do you bone a chicken?"

"tastes so good makes you want to slap your mamma!!"

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I turned it off tonight when my daughter asked for a Pingu video to be put on.More entertaining for sure

Pingu rules!! :laugh:

much rather watch pingu or teletubbies or even magic roundabout

then any current cooking programme on tv :wink:

btw Andy shame you didn't make it on the pilot but sure there will be other opportunities to see you in action.

"so tell me how do you bone a chicken?"

"tastes so good makes you want to slap your mamma!!"

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I seem to recall that Sophie Grigson use kiwi fruit juice as a ceviche marinade in her excellent Fish cookbook.  I think it's an idea from New Zealand.  So origamicrane is in exalted company.

thanks for the support

glad to know that i am as mad as the kiwi's!!!

hohoho! :wink::laugh:

"so tell me how do you bone a chicken?"

"tastes so good makes you want to slap your mamma!!"

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They score each other on how entertaining the evening has been. In some cases they have been impressed because they have had belly dancers as entertainment, I've also seen people moaning about "poncy" food. A lot of the food looks like slop on a plate. It really is just a bitch-fest. If they don't like you, however good your food is you will score poorly.

oh no!! Son of a heifer!! and I thought it was serious! :angry:

ho hum! guess i just go a long for the ride then

and I was planning such a nice meal.

When are you filming this? Your menu looks fab!

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They score each other on how entertaining the evening has been. In some cases they have been impressed because they have had belly dancers as entertainment, I've also seen people moaning about "poncy" food. A lot of the food looks like slop on a plate. It really is just a bitch-fest. If they don't like you, however good your food is you will score poorly.

oh no!! Son of a heifer!! and I thought it was serious! :angry:

ho hum! guess i just go a long for the ride then

and I was planning such a nice meal.

When are you filming this? Your menu looks fab!

thanks Foodie :biggrin:

that was the type of food I wanted to cook in the previous two shows.

I got the audition later today and they are filming 11th April I should know if i'm on the show by the end of the month.

Think I will cook that menu for this show as i'm not charming enough to win anyway :rolleyes:

quite funny actually as just spotted the plating and presentation course on eGCI http://forums.egullet.org/index.php?showtopic=64107

now those are pretty pictures.

I got to learn to take better photos of my food or i might just blame my camera. :raz:

anyhoo anyone a somellier? or good at pairing wine with food?

as trying to pair some with the following dishes

1. blackcod and miso

2. foie gras, scallops and green pea puree

3. chicken ballotine with a chicken rosemary jus.

Edited by origamicrane (log)

"so tell me how do you bone a chicken?"

"tastes so good makes you want to slap your mamma!!"

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just had the audition /interview.

The Granada tv boys were an hour early!!

so they had to sit around in the car waiting for me.

Took 20 minutes just waundered about my house while they asked me questions about my cooking and what i was going to do for the entertaining.

:unsure:

guess i could pull the karaoke machine out? or do some magic tricks? might even be mad enough to set up a bow and arrow in my back garden. hhmmm..

Then they asked what would be my nightmare dinner guest and what would be my nightmare dinner party.(that could be an interesting thread of its own)

Well for me a nightmare guest would be someone with no social etiquette, smelly, ignorant and generally obnoxious without having any kind of redeeming feature to shout about. :raz:

My nightmare dinner party would be someone trying really hard to impress with their cooking but having next to no idea about cooking. As i be watching them in the kitchen and having the overwhelming urge to go in and take over!!! think it be kinda like watch that blue soup scene in brigette jones diary.

They confirmed some of the rules too,

you have to presubmit your menu and you can't change it so shouldn't really matter if you go first or last. You can't give someone zero marks if you don't have a valid reason.

They said 60 people had applied, they are visiting 30 of those and they will pick 9 the final 5 will be decide by the people at Channel 4.

Anyway they are filming on the 25th April now and I should know in a week or so.

hope i get on or all that effort practising over the weekend will be kinda lost.

"so tell me how do you bone a chicken?"

"tastes so good makes you want to slap your mamma!!"

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just had the audition /interview.

The Granada tv boys were an hour early!!

so they had to sit around in the car waiting for me.

Took 20 minutes just waundered about my house while they asked me questions about my cooking and what i was going to do for the entertaining.

:unsure: 

guess i could pull the karaoke machine out? or do some magic tricks? might even be mad enough to set up a bow and arrow in my back garden. hhmmm..

Then they asked what would be my nightmare dinner guest and what would be my nightmare dinner party.(that could be an interesting thread of its own)

Well for me a nightmare guest would be someone with no social etiquette, smelly, ignorant and generally obnoxious without having any kind of redeeming feature to shout about.  :raz:

My nightmare dinner party would be someone trying really hard to impress with their cooking but having next to no idea about cooking. As i be watching them in the kitchen and having the overwhelming urge to go in and take over!!! think it be kinda like watch that blue soup scene in brigette jones diary.

They confirmed some of the rules too,

you have to presubmit your menu and you can't change it so shouldn't really matter if you go first or last. You can't give someone zero marks if you don't have a valid reason.

They said 60 people had applied, they are visiting 30 of those and they will pick 9 the final 5 will be decide by the people at Channel 4.

Anyway they are filming on the 25th April now and I should know in a week or so.

hope i get on or all that effort practising over the weekend will be kinda lost.

Sounds to me like they are setting you up! I imagine that they will choose the person they believe has the least social etiquette and put them in your group. As for not changing your menu, I assure you people scored badly because they didn't take into account allergies!

"Why would we want Children? What do they know about food?"

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Anyway, back to Masterchef....

...I was interested to fin out that the Corrs had dined at the worlds best restaurants. Next time I see them I'll be sure to ask them about Gagnaire, Bras,. Veyrat, Adria.

I couldn't help noticing that the voiceover said that Christopher was doing badly after Thomisina fucked up the vol au vent cases - why does that reflect badly on Christopher, he was only preparing the filling?

Graham R, please feel free to PM me with your theory. In confidence of course!

"Why would we want Children? What do they know about food?"

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Sounds to me like they are setting you up! I imagine that they will choose the person they believe has the least social etiquette and put them in your group. As for not changing your menu, I assure you people scored badly because they didn't take into account allergies!

I know but then again won't make for interesting TV if everyone is nice and friendly to each other. :wink:

If it isn't the judges being nasty

then it has to be the contestants

or in this case the contestants are the judges. :huh:

Yeah its true about the food allergies, religious/ethical beliefs, etc,

but without prior knowledge of who is in the group

its impossible to design a perfect menu

unless you go for something that is very unadventurous.

But having said that i might add a veggy dish

think a veggy terrine would look nice in the flow of the menu.

"so tell me how do you bone a chicken?"

"tastes so good makes you want to slap your mamma!!"

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I couldn't help noticing that the voiceover said that Christopher was doing badly after Thomisina fucked up the vol au vent cases - why does that reflect badly on Christopher, he was only preparing the filling?

Because what they were testing was teamwork and it looked as though he refused to discuss the pastry for the vol au vent with Thomasina. I'm not clear which of them was actually doing the filling: Christopher seemed to be spending all of his time producing some parsley flavoured charcoal.

So far my money is on Mark: he's the least experienced, but he seems to be better at following instructions than the others and at this stage of the competition that looks to be the critical factor. Also he seems to be lucky, as when his dessert went wrong but still came out as the Corr's favourite.

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Yeah its true about the food allergies, religious/ethical beliefs, etc,

but without prior knowledge of who is in the group

its impossible to design a perfect menu

unless you go for something that is very unadventurous.

But having said that i might add a veggy dish

think a veggy terrine would look nice in the flow of the menu.

I am sure that they have to provide you with any special dietary considerations of the contestants.

Did they ask you if you have any special diets or alergies?

This show did not look like it had any evil subplots... like they do on wife swap and the lot. It seemed a little more happy go lucky.

About the rules of the show....

Do the contestant get to meet before the first dinner party? I've always dreaded blind dates, but blind dinner parties. Eeeeek!

Can you tweek your menu? Say for instance you cant get a key ingredient.

Does the production team plug the other guests with your culinary secrets i.e packaged food. Or would they be completly oblivious if you had it catered.

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Anyway, back to Masterchef....

...I was interested to fin out that the Corrs had dined at the worlds best restaurants. Next  time I see them I'll be sure to ask them about Gagnaire, Bras,. Veyrat, Adria.

crikey is this still going !

let me get this straight the corrs, as in the band are the latest celebrity judges?

it was bad enough with only torode and wallace to contend with.

gary

you don't win friends with salad

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Yeah its true about the food allergies, religious/ethical beliefs, etc,

but without prior knowledge of who is in the group

its impossible to design a perfect menu

unless you go for something that is very unadventurous.

But having said that i might add a veggy dish

think a veggy terrine would look nice in the flow of the menu.

I am sure that they have to provide you with any special dietary considerations of the contestants.

Did they ask you if you have any special diets or alergies?

This show did not look like it had any evil subplots... like they do on wife swap and the lot. It seemed a little more happy go lucky.

About the rules of the show....

Do the contestant get to meet before the first dinner party? I've always dreaded blind dates, but blind dinner parties. Eeeeek!

Can you tweek your menu? Say for instance you cant get a key ingredient.

Does the production team plug the other guests with your culinary secrets i.e packaged food. Or would they be completly oblivious if you had it catered.

Yeah they asked me about any allergies but not like and dislikes.

Not sure how any of the other rules work as the guy said there were no rules really.

I doubt we get to meet each other beforehand except maybe a few hours before the first dinner party.

From what they said you have to presubmit your menu and are not allowed to change / tweak it.

Naturally if you can't find a particular ingredient you can substitute it but i doubt they will allow you to cook a completely different dish.

No they don't tell you anything prior to the dinner itself so you won't know who is doing what.

I believe the show was originally called "let me entertain you" which would have been more appropriate then "come dine with me" as the enthesis seems to be on the entertainment value of the whole night rather then the dinner.

As i said thinking of sticking a veggy dish in, that way the 6 course menu should cover most bases.

"so tell me how do you bone a chicken?"

"tastes so good makes you want to slap your mamma!!"

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