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crimes against grocery


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Mayhaw said something in the express checkout thread about honesty when checking out in the self-service aisle. it reminded me of my own routine crime against grocery.

i consider myself a relatively honest person, but i cheat at the grocery. i love shiitake mushrooms and (when they're not pre-packaged - no doubt done to discourage my kind!) i rip the stems off and only take the caps. if the stem is thin or staff is on top of me - i'll take the stem, but i think of it as a tiny personal defeat.

i feel slight shame - but really - unless you're slow cooking or making soup, the stems are inedible and at $12.99 / lb i resent paying for them.

flog me.

or join me in the shopping cart to hell!

edit: clarity

Edited by reesek (log)

from overheard in new york:

Kid #1: Paper beats rock. BAM! Your rock is blowed up!

Kid #2: "Bam" doesn't blow up, "bam" makes it spicy. Now I got a SPICY ROCK! You can't defeat that!

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i snap off the amount of ginger i need, instead of buying the whole "hand"...is this a crime, too? (it also helps to see if the ginger is fresh or terribly fibrous, altho i buy what i've snapped...)

what makes me nuts, is buying fennel with the entire plant attached-i need the bulb and maybe a few fronds, not the whole damn bush, especially since i'm paying by the lb.

"Laughter is brightest where food is best."

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Author of The I Love Trader Joe's Cookbook ,The I Love Trader Joe's Party Cookbook and The I Love Trader Joe's Around the World Cookbook

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i consider myself a relatively honest person, but i cheat at the grocery. i love shiitake mushrooms and (when they're not pre-packaged - no doubt done to discourage my kind!) i rip the stems off and only take the caps. if the stem is thin or staff is on top of me - i'll take the stem, but i think of it as a tiny personal defeat.

i feel slight shame - but really - unless you're slow cooking or making soup, the stems are inedible and at $12.99 / lb i resent paying for them.

Egad.

That's outrageous.

Taking the stems off a bit less so.

"I've caught you Richardson, stuffing spit-backs in your vile maw. 'Let tomorrow's omelets go empty,' is that your fucking attitude?" -E. B. Farnum

"Behold, I teach you the ubermunch. The ubermunch is the meaning of the earth. Let your will say: the ubermunch shall be the meaning of the earth!" -Fritzy N.

"It's okay to like celery more than yogurt, but it's not okay to think that batter is yogurt."

Serving fine and fresh gratuitous comments since Oct 5 2001, 09:53 PM

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i thought i was the only person who de-stemed shitaki's. do it and do it for the same reason. while were openly confessing, i also help myself to to some of the candy that sits in the bulk bins, far away in the corner of my local harris teeter.

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i snap off the amount of ginger i need, instead of buying the whole "hand"...is this a crime, too? (it also helps to see if the ginger is fresh or terribly fibrous, altho i buy what i've snapped...)
I do the same thing. It never occurred to me until just now that there might be something wrong with the behavior. Edited by bloviatrix (log)

"Some people see a sheet of seaweed and want to be wrapped in it. I want to see it around a piece of fish."-- William Grimes

"People are bastard-coated bastards, with bastard filling." - Dr. Cox on Scrubs

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I pick through the baskets of strawberries, and oust all the nasty ones lurking in the bottom, to make me one perfect basket. I don't put the nasties back in other baskets though, just leave them lying loose in the astrograss bin.

I once saw a woman going down the condiment aisle, opening jar lids of different chutneys. She'd stick a finger deep inside, and then the loaded finger in her mouth. :blink: Eventually, she chose a winner for her cart....

...ever since that day, I always take a jar of anything from the very back of the shelf.

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i snap off the amount of ginger i need, instead of buying the whole "hand"...is this a crime, too? (it also helps to see if the ginger is fresh or terribly fibrous, altho i buy what i've snapped...)
I do the same thing. It never occurred to me until just now that there might be something wrong with the behavior.

That's not so bad. At least you pay for what you take. I have seen people snap off a couple of the little "toes" and just stick them in a pocket.

A couple of days ago I saw a guy do this, then take a tamarind pod, stick that in a pocket along with a couple of dried peppers (sold in bulk in this market). He did buy a bunch of green onions and a head of lettuce. Also a pint of tequila.

All the way home I was wondering what the heck he was going to make with the stuff he bought.

"There are, it has been said, two types of people in the world. There are those who say: this glass is half full. And then there are those who say: this glass is half empty. The world belongs, however, to those who can look at the glass and say: What's up with this glass? Excuse me? Excuse me? This is my glass? I don't think so. My glass was full! And it was a bigger glass!" Terry Pratchett

 

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Hmmm, I'm paranoid about not taking something in the manner it is presented. Heck, I feel guilty manhandling every tomato/onion/etc in the pile just to pick out the good ones, even though I know this is accepted practice.

The one thing I will do is allow the cashier to ring items up improperly if he/she decided that my shitaki or criminis are 'Mushrooms, general, $.99/lbs).

He don't mix meat and dairy,

He don't eat humble pie,

So sing a miserere

And hang the bastard high!

- Richard Wilbur and John LaTouche from Candide

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Sometimes I take a peice of candy from the bulk candy bins and suck on it while I am shopping. You know, a little something to keep my sugar level up so I don't kill someone.

Jason Perlow, Co-Founder eGullet Society for Culinary Arts & Letters

Foodies who Review South Florida (Facebook) | offthebroiler.com - Food Blog (archived) | View my food photos on Instagram

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I once saw a woman going down the condiment aisle, opening jar lids of different chutneys. She'd stick a finger deep inside, and then the loaded finger in her mouth. :blink: Eventually, she chose a winner for her cart....

...ever since that day, I always take a jar of anything from the very back of the shelf.

I guess that's one reason why most lids are now tamper proof pop tops.

I see evidence of people opening packages of food in the store, eating out of them, and then leaving them on the shelves. I guess they think they deserve a "complimentary" snack. :blink:

I must say that I enjoy having checkers that don't know the price of their produce. You want to charge me 59c for ALL those onions instead of 59c per pound. OK! :laugh: When I inform them that they charged me for large lemons instead of small ones, they roll their eyes and tell me to go to customer service. :hmmm: Its their job to know their stuff.

it just makes me want to sit down and eat a bag of sugar chased down by a bag of flour.

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I have posted on this before but I'll repeat that I hate parents who get their kids cookies and brownies to keep their little mouths busy at the supermarket and then they don't PAY for the snacks. I also dislike adults taking fruit and eating it while shopping and doing likewise. There's no intention of paying for the food they are stealing. And that's what it is...stealing. I always hope they get a nice case of diarrhea. :cool: Now.. if I am harried, hurried, and not paying attention to the screen as the items are scanned, and am charged for red cabbage when I have raddichio in my plastic bag...well...I am usually already home when I find this out, and the product is chopped, cooked or otherwise in use. I am not a saint, so I allow myself the occasional error on the part of the checker to be in my favor a couple times a year. I more than make up for my "behavior" though..because I am the gal who puts the chicken breasts BACK into the meat case that some lazy assed FOOL has dropped into the feminine hygiene section of the market. As long as the package is still cold. If it's warm, I take it to customer service and 'splain where I found it. Hopefully they get rid of it. (HAW HAW)

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Think of the farmers who had to grow and pick your produce. Think of the rest of us who pay more for the whole thing 'cause you don't.

True Heroism is remarkably sober, very undramatic.

It is not the urge to surpass all others at whatever cost,

but the urge to serve others at whatever cost. -Arthur Ashe

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I also dislike adults taking fruit and eating it while shopping and doing likewise. There's no intention of paying for the food they are stealing. And that's what it is...stealing. I always hope they get a nice case of diarrhea. :cool:

This bothers me, but I've seen worse when it comes to fruit -- here in Manhattan, many of the markets have fruit displays on the street. I've seen people grab a handful of cherries and continue on their way. Because, afterall it's the job of the market to provide free snacks to everyone who pass by. :angry:

"Some people see a sheet of seaweed and want to be wrapped in it. I want to see it around a piece of fish."-- William Grimes

"People are bastard-coated bastards, with bastard filling." - Dr. Cox on Scrubs

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As the FLATLANDER's sing "YOU'VE GOT TO SLEEP ALONE" even is yer lying with somebody you've got to go to sleep alone. Follow your heart and do the right thing. :sad:

Bruce Frigard

Quality control Taster, Château D'Eau Winery

"Free time is the engine of ingenuity, creativity and innovation"

111,111,111 x 111,111,111 = 12,345,678,987,654,321

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I like going to this one store (Grocery Direct) that packages berries with plastic rubberbanded on top of the berry basket because I'm otherwise always stuck with the crap berries that others cull out from theirs. Also, they're inexpensive and almost every berry is pure red all the way through and sweeeeeet.

It's not that easy to bruise onions, so I wouldn't feel bad about going through a couple to get an especially large or small one for dinner. However, I try not to mess around with soft stuff like tomatoes, or eggplants, because they are easy to bruise.

Luckily I grow my own squash. At the market, I look at the limp specimens that have obviously seen better days, and wonder who would ever want them. (I'm still talking about squash here) Summer squash is very easy to bruise, esp the kinds I like best.

I don't understand the whole free fruit thing. Doesn't your market offer samples? You can try all sorts of things, even some stuff you wouldn't have tried otherwise. A lot of markets seem to offer this on weekends. Some higher end markets offer samples every day. I have tried combination of say goat cheese and cranberry sauce and something else that I never would have tried on my own, but was actually...not bad.

I also sometimes put back stuff that other people have tossed into the wrong spot, but I think it's just compulsiveness on my part.

I love cold Dinty Moore beef stew. It is like dog food! And I am like a dog.

--NeroW

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I'm sorry to disappoint some of you, but I'm pretty much of a goody two-shoes on this. I don't take samples unless the store is clearly offering some (and then, I take them with caution, knowing that others are likely to have put their paws all over them). And I give change back to the cashier in the rare event I'm overpaid. But I don't correct inputting errors that are in my favor, because I think that's bad for the cashier. The reason I think so is because of one experience I had at a Gristedes store on 100 St. in Manhattan. When I pointed out to a cashier that she had undercharged me for an item, she was nonplussed, but her manager clarified it to her. I had gotten her in trouble, and I felt lousy about it.

Michael aka "Pan"

 

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I gotta say that I was contemplating a post about this when Pan weighed in. Quite frankly, I think some of these nefarious activities border on theft. I guess that I am a moral realist in that things are either wrong or not. Cheating would weigh on my soul too much. I am one of those folks that would correct the cashier if they mistook radichio for red cabbage. For the few cents that I would gain, it isn't worth it for my peace of mind.

Linda LaRose aka "fifi"

"Having spent most of my life searching for truth in the excitement of science, I am now in search of the perfectly seared foie gras without any sweet glop." Linda LaRose

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I am one of those folks that would correct the cashier if they mistook radichio for red cabbage. For the few cents that I would gain, it isn't worth it for my peace of mind.

Re read my post. :wink:

Now.. if I am harried, hurried, and not paying attention to the screen as the items are scanned, and am charged for red cabbage when I have raddichio in my plastic bag...well...I am usually already home when I find this out, and the product is chopped, cooked or otherwise in use. I am not a saint, so I allow myself the occasional error on the part of the checker

I am NOT trotting back to Shop Rite for this type of thing. Sorry. I make up for it in other ways, trust me. I believe in kharma. If the dopes don't get my produce correct when I am busy BAGGING my own groceries and not looking at what they're doing....it's tough titties. :cool:

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Well I dunno about in the US but in the UK supermarkets commit all kinds of deeds which I consider to be x100 more immoral than removing a broccoli stalk.

Only taking produce from large producers

Squeezing farmers to subsistence levels

Or taking additional profit from fair-trade products (see http://www.newfarm.org/international/news/...fairtrade.shtml )

Moreover, I never complain over people taking a grape in a shop when my nikes were made in a sweatshop-type factory. But I buy as much fairtrade stuff as possible.

It depends on whether you're thinking about big-picture or small picture morality.

Edited for clarity

Edited by Naomi (log)
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I have posted on this before but I'll repeat that I hate parents who get their kids cookies and brownies to keep their little mouths busy at the supermarket and then they don't PAY for the snacks. I also dislike adults taking fruit and eating it while shopping and doing likewise. There's no intention of paying for the food they are stealing. And that's what it is...stealing. I always hope they get a nice case of diarrhea. :cool:

Wow that's pretty harsh. I always give my kids a cookie or small bagel. My Shop Rite gave me a kids club card that entitles the kids to 1 cookie while shopping. I find it really helps when we are waiting in the checkout line. (PS if my daughter wants a bagel instead of a cookie, I pay for it).

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i snap off the amount of ginger i need, instead of buying the whole "hand"...is this a crime, too? (it also helps to see if the ginger is fresh or terribly fibrous, altho i buy what i've snapped...)
I do the same thing. It never occurred to me until just now that there might be something wrong with the behavior.

it never occurred to me until just now why they're so expensive. :rolleyes::laugh:

edit: oops. i was referring to the shitake, not the ginger, which is practically free to begin with (which is why i started taking the whole damned hand instead of the finger). but the point stands.

Edited by tommy (log)
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I always give my kids a cookie or small bagel. .... I find it really helps when we are waiting in the checkout line.

Were does one draw the line? I mean, some freak out because a FTV host touches their hair while prepping food that they themselves will be eating. Then there are those that their stomaches churn when a server touches a lettuce leaf of their house salad when carrying the plates to the table. And here is some discussion about grocery shopping carts....

I sincerely don't mean to put anyone off, and with apologies in advance if anyone should find this upsetting, but it is something to think about when a young child is eating, while seated seated in a cart at the grocery store.

My biggest pet peeve and I find completely a crime against grocery: finding packages in inappropriate places, i.e, a package of fresh strawberries dumped in the freezer, a seafood package left in the cereal aisle, etc.

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Those who congratulating themselves on doing the right thing are upholding the Fourth Law of False Spirituality..which states that whenever one does a good deed, one is obliged to tell the first 500 people one meets about it.

As far as karma goes, Sunday afternoon here in the earthy crunchy groceria, an unsupervised toddler got her meat hooks on a Scotch Bonnet pepper, and learned something about vegetables she may never forget. Quite the scene, down there in the produce dept.

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Sorry, kids.

What you are doing is stealing and I don't know how you all were brought up, but I was always taught that taking things from a store that you don't pay for is wrong.

And these bullsh** rationalizations that 1) taking some candy that I didn't pay for keeps me sane or 2) the man (in this case the corporate owner of the grocery store) is already "stealing" from you in the form of high grocery prices does not make it OK to take something you don't pay for.

I mean come on, you all can afford the things you are stealing so just pay for it.

Jennifer
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