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Competition: Round Twenty

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Confession of a late-blooming Poetry Geek: I celebrate Poetry Month, which is, fittingly, April. Shakespeare's Birthday is in April. Daffodils bloom in April. Oh! to be in England, etc. I read a poem at breakfastime. I send my love a snatch of verse every day for thirty days ... unless, of course, I forget.

"O! How this spring of Love resembleth

The uncertain glory of an April day."

Enough of this English Major stuff. April ain't just Poetry Month, folks! It's International Guitar Month. National Anxiety Month. National Humor Month. National Garden Month. Math Awareness Month. National Welding Month!

And, oh, the Food Holidays in April. Click on your Calendar and start typing. (Sorry, we missed April 2 -- PBJ Day)

April 14: Pecan Day

April 16: Eggs Benedict Day

April 17: National Cheeseball Day

April 19: A High Holy Day -- Garlic Day

April 22: Jelly Bean Day

April 24: Pig in a Blanket Day

April 25: Zucchini Bread Day (Er, in April?)

April 26: Pretzel Day

April 29: "Shrimp Scampi " Day

Here's the challenge: Choose one of these Food Festivals and pretend that it's a bank holiday, a day off holiday, an over-the-hills-and-through-the-woods kind of day. Are there traditional songs, sides and sports on TV? How do you decorate the table? Do you pull names for the family gift exchange?

Have a wonderful month, you amusing (but anxious) math-aware, guitar strumming, gardening, poetic arc welders!

I know what I'm using for a tablecloth on the 24th.

Get festive here.

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OK, in honor of National Pecan Day, I've set the table with cunning little placecard holders involving pecans in the shell and a three hours with an Xacto knife. (Martha and I still talk.) The guests are drunk enough to make rude remarks involving the word "nuts" and are flipping forkfuls of whipped cream at each other. Purists! They prefer their pecan pie plain.

I'm afraid to ask these folks to dinner on the 16th --Eggs Benedict Day. On the other hand, I bet Hollandaise is a great hair conditioner.

Wiping whipped cream from my decolletage, I urge you to party on here.

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And the days dwindle down to a precious few... Oops! Wrong month.

I'm closing this contest at midnight, May 1, in a time zone of your choice.

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