TDG: First Drunk

[Lady T]

Who would be the third sage for such a Bet Din? Jessica Simpson?

[Rabbi Ribeye]

Who would be the third sage for such a Bet Din? Jessica Simpson?

. . . only if Shmuley Boteach doesn't give Jacko semicha between now and then.

[bloviatrix]

Who would be the third sage for such a Bet Din?  Jessica Simpson? 

. . . only if Shmuley Boteach doesn't give Jacko semicha between now and then.

[Cusina]

Lady T, I don't suppose you would share that champange punch recipe, pretty please??

Well, my first drunk isn't nearly as um, colorful as some of these. No harleys involved. We went to the local touristy winery shop for the purchase thinking they wouldn't be carding very vigilantly. They could have cared less that I was 16. It was my girlfriend Jen's birthday, she was sleeping over and my parents were out for the evening. She and I polished off three bottles of wine (most of it mixed with SPRITE, blech!), laughed a LOT and passed out by 11:00. I think my parents knew what the deal was, but didn't say a word. Later on in life they confessed that they knew all, but felt like it was a hell of a lot safer for us to learn that lesson at home than to sneak off with the car and a few boys somewhere. Definitely the case.

[Lady T]

Who would be the third sage for such a Bet Din?  Jessica Simpson? 

. . . only if Shmuley Boteach doesn't give Jacko semicha between now and then.

Reb Michael of Neverland? I can juuuuuust imagine the bar mitzvah parties. Gah.

And Cusina...I'll dig into the moving boxes at home, see if I can locate that recipe, and PM it to you. (Or would everybody like to have it? Don't think Dad got it from a published source; therefore, it can be published with impunity by an heir[ess] of his, namely moi.) Got a bride you need to bemuse? Or bridesmaids to bomb? Parents-in-law to pacify, perhaps?

[Marlene]

Then by all means, put it in the recipe archive Please.

[Lady T]

Shall do. Once (eep) I locate it. But Marlene: how does eGRA work with inexact, by-guess-and-by-gosh measurements? Dad always did the punch (therefore, so do I) by pouring things into the punchbowl purely by eye.

Edited February 18, 2004 by Lady T (log)

[snowangel]

My first one was New Year's week on an island off Phuket in Thailand, and it was Mekong. Those that have had, will know. A swim in the warm waters does wonders. Don't remember (thank you Mekong) much else. Growing up in Thailand in the late 60's/early 70's, liquor was not the prevalent inebrient

[Cusina]

And Cusina...I'll dig into the moving boxes at home, see if I can locate that recipe, and PM it to you. (Or would everybody like to have it? Don't think Dad got it from a published source; therefore, it can be published with impunity by an heir[ess] of his, namely moi.) Got a bride you need to bemuse? Or bridesmaids to bomb? Parents-in-law to pacify, perhaps?

Excellent! Thank you!

I'm actually throwing a baby shower. I know, I know, I promise to steer the mom-to-be toward the other punch bowl!

This is a very close knit bunch of girls. We do a spa weekend/slumber party every year and this year, there are two pregs to celebrate. Our baby showers are usually strewn with pink balloons decorated as big boobs so anything goes.

[Marlene]

. Our baby showers are usually strewn with pink balloons decorated as big boobs so anything goes.

This is jsut way too much information. But I'm anxiously awaiting that recipe, so go dig girl, go dig!

[chow guy]

My first drink was 2 six packs of Budweiser..... It was the summer after graduation from high school and I was still sweet sixteen and working (seven days a week, three meals a day) at a hotel in the Catskills.

The trees started dancing and coming alive and then the spinning and ofcourse the next morning an awful hangover.

I was off and running and got into all kinds of scrapes before going to the city to college that fall where I could really party hardy. Oh my, how things have changed. Thank goodness.

[psychobombshell]

This is going to make my long-suffering and wonderful mother look really bad, but....

I was 3 or 4...my mom's loser Tommy Chong-esque friends (you know the type.."Like, wow, man!" is every other sentence) decided it'd be fun to get the baby drunk... ...not that I'd want to, but I still can't drink Hamm's beer

[Lady T]

I know, I know, I promise to steer the mom-to-be toward the other punch bowl!

You comfort my soul. Without that disclaimer, I'd've omitted the booze from the recipe for safety's sake, and what fun'd that be, for pity's sake?!

*Salutes and runs.* I'm diggin', Marlene, I'm diggin'!

[sequim]

Reading this thread is making me queasy. Do I really want to relive the first time?

The most memorable one, anyways, involved rootbeer schnapps on Christmas Day with me and my two roommates - this happened in the morning, well before noon. We were only going to do a few cheers with it... what a ruin of Christmas Day, but luckily it only ruined my taste for schnapps and not for any good liquors, like tequila.

Then there was the time I caught my SO in bed with someone else, that someone being a roommate in the house we all shared. So I stormed off and finished off a half bottle of whiskey. I was drunk for two days. I think that was the very worse.

[balmagowry]

*Salutes and runs.* I'm diggin', Marlene, I'm diggin'!

And, um, while you're at it, if you happen to run across the other three soul-destroyers...!

Edited February 20, 2004 by balmagowry (log)

[Lady T]

Oh, they're together in whichever of the boxes they reside (Murphy's Law/Corollaries: they'll be in the highest-up, hardest box to access and/or the last one into which I burrow.).

But with what will I entertain my fellow home-for-the-aged inmates long years in the future, if I give all the recipes away now?

[JennotJenn]

This isn't the first falling down drunk, but it's the drunkest falling down drunk I've ever been.

It was second half of senior year in college. I was 21. My friends were having a party at their on campus apartment. I know there was tequila. I think it was in margarita form, but I wouldn't swear to it. We were going to go to a soul food restaurant downtown for after party eats, but I got so drunk that I couldn't make it. Instead, I decided to lie down on the communal lawn. Another drunk decided to start passing out beside me. I remember making out with him at some point and thinking "hey...it's whatzisname...I thought he was gay...". He was. Is. Whatever, all that matters is that we were both that drunk. Right before I passed out I decided to stand up and throw up all over the lawn. Charming, really.

I called the next day to apologize to the hosts. Apology accepted, but they didn't fail to mention that the college maintenence guy had to come out and throw sand on the lawn.

[auntdot]

Don't remember my first drunk, but Huevos del Toro raised an interesting issue.

(Am fairly new to this forum, so if I am out of line please let me know.)

And that was making hard apple cider.

Stopped at a roadside stand a number of years ago and found cider that someone had placed XXX on. When we asked we were told the cider was a bit older and had started to ferment.

We bought every container and found it delightful, if very mild in alcohol content.

Then went out, purchased some more gallon containers, removed some of the cider, dissolved some regular old sugar in it (it required some heating), and when cooled returned the sweetened stuff to the cider container. No measurements, just winged it.

Left the screw cap unscrewed just enough to let carbon dioxide out and left the stuff in the back of a fridge for several months.

We wound up with a wonderful, clear, alcoholic cider.

(No, we added no yeast, there was plenty of natural yeast on the apples, and used no fancy equipment like a fermentation lock).

Repeated the process every year until everyone started adding preservatives to their raw cider. That kills the fermentation process, alas.

Now we can only make it if we buy the apples and make our own cider.

But if you have access to freshly pressed cider, and would like a treat, just try it.

[balmagowry]

We wound up with a wonderful, clear, alcoholic cider.

Repeated the process every year until everyone started adding preservatives to their raw cider.  That kills the fermentation process, alas.

Sounds just wonderful. I'm pretty sure you can still get preservative-free raw cider at some stands or at least from organic sources - though I suppose that would be expensive. This is a bit OT, but I've been thinking about doing the same with cider vinegar - mother too good to waste, so I thought, why not slip it into a gallon of raw cider and let it do its thing. But now you've got me thinking of more exciting applications. Is it October yet?

[HKDave]

I can't remember my first drunk - probably sneaking drinks at some boring family event or getting wasted at a high school party, there were plenty of both back in the day. But I do remember my first major adult drunk.... at least the initial part of it.

I was in my early 20's, in Long Beach for a trade show, and the travel agent had booked me into a mediocre apartment hotel. The building had a small local bar attached to it. Now, at this point of my life, I'd spent some time drinking draft beer in stripper bars, that being the popular choice in Vancouver back in the days when nobody seemed to ask for ID, but I'd never been to a real American-style bar. And I noticed this place had a giant free sub sandwich during happy hour, so I wisely figured that I'd have a drink or two and save money by eating some sub for dinner.

I started with double rum and cokes - a kiddie drink if there ever was one - and continued with more double rum and cokes, and then some more. The place was reasonably friendly and the bartender was generous with the pour. I remember there was some popcorn on the bar, and I did eat some of that (I know this because I was able to see the popcorn later that night - the memory of the texture of reguritated popcorn still haunts me), but I never did get to the sub sandwich. Just sat there and drank more and more rum and coke. After a while, I realized that somehow I had become seriously inebriated, so I got my bill and went to my room.

Where, almost immediately, my brain exploded. I later determined from my bill that I had somehow consumed 18 rum and cokes in one sitting, and at the time I was a skinny kid, so that was a heck of a lot of alcohol. They all seemed to hit me at the same time. I will spare you all the details of that night, mostly because I can't remember them, but you can guess - part of the time unconcious on the floor, a lot of the time driving the porcelein bus, the rest of the time wondering when I would die so that the pain could stop. I prayed that night, and I am not exactly a religous man.

The California sun rose the next morning, but I didn't - it was about noon before I dared move very far from the toilet, and then only because it was check-out time. I stumbled over toward convention center wearing dark glasses, found a patch of grass along the way, and passed out cold for the afternoon. If someone wanted to take my wallet, or for that matter my pants, I would never have noticed. I got a nice raccoon sunburn from lying face up with sunglasses on.

Then it was back to the airport for the flight home, having done absolutely no work at all. I can't remember what I told my boss. I was just about to say that I haven't touched rum and coke since, but that wouldn't be true. There was that time in Dana Point last year, with that incident in the pool hall afterward..... but this is a thread about the first time.

- Hong Kong Dave

[mikerock]

i started drinking early on and will omit all my getting plastered on the way to school trips. but the most fun i've ever had getting completely drunk was a couple years ago. i was 21 and cooking at avery nice rest in central new york. we did a lot of paired wine diners and the such so i accompanied the maitre'd down to nyc for a wine tasting at the marriot marquis. the day started out with a tutored 5 yr vertical tasting of joseph drouhin. then we went to lunch at the morel wine bar and , for some reason, paid for wine and food. then went back to catch the start of the grand tasting. like i said, i was quite the drinker already and my partner in crime was just as able bodied (and 7 years older). we reallyheld our own there for about 3 hours. then the first real mistake of the day. the tasting was taking place on a circular walkway above the hotel bar. my partner noticed some people enjoying a martini and insisted that we "take a break" and have a drink. a cople manhattans and were back in business

things at the tasting now started to get a little weird. we were talking too much. way too much. i scared the hell out of the wine guys from nobu (you can picture a drunk, bearded 6'3" 180lb white guy towering over two innocent japaneese guys yelling "your place is awesome. i mean it guys, fuckin' awesome."

as the tasting started winding down our wine rep found us and invited us out to dinner. this is where the story turns regrettable. as we're walking down the street to meet him at his hotel we pass a beer store selling all sorts of little gems unavailable back home. it being 5:00 and our return flight home some 15 hours away i thaught it a perfect time to buy 3 six packs worth od single bottles and lug them around. we climb into the cab and are whisked away to none other than grammercy tavern. as we pull up a horible feeling starts to well from within. not because i'm going to throw up. but because i'm about to waste a free dinner at one of ny's best. i'd had probably 70 or so "tastes" that day. my favs at the time were big reds and icewines so my mouth was shot. i was starting to get that almost stimulate feeling from the booze and was in no mood to relax and take in the meal. and i was going from lucid but poor decision making intoxicated to drunk. i did what all of us would do in that situation. i grabed a bottle of beer out of my bag and started drinking. this did set off some alarms with the waitstaff, but to their credit instead of freaking out the brought me a glass and poured my beer into it and let me go. i won't get into the food of the night cause i can't remember. i know i had sturgeon and spinach. not really sure what else. in fact that is where the night kind of winds down. i have interspersed memories of drinking more of my beer with some bouncers on the street, eating caviar and potato chips at a russian bar called KGB (it was on the menu not some white trash thing i made up) and being coerced into a tequilla bar. the night rounded up nicely i suppose as i was woken from my sleep under a luggage rack at jfk by the very early morning cleaning crew and told i wasn't allowed to sleep there. all my beer was gone and i was put in charge of waking my now comatose partner from his sleep on an abandoned reception desk nearby. all in all it was a great time and i didn't throw up. but i've made myself go back to grammercy and craft (and spend way too much) to make up for the lost opportunity

[ruthcooks]

Hey, Gifted Gourmet, I had my first drunk at the U. of Illinois also, in the fall of 1956. Went on a double date with the girl across the hall, went to a bar and ended up drinking NINE 7&7s. I kept saying I'd had seven 9&9s and thinking it was hilarious. The guy I was with was not too friendly, so I told him off in un-ladylike terms. When I got back to the dorm, I took off all my clothes and ran around the dorm. Luckily, it was not coed. Talk about losing your inhibitions. I eventually vomited in the sink, and my friend finally got me to bed. She's still my friend.

I repeated this behavior exactly one more time, a few weeks later. Then I got it. Getting drunk is no fun at all, and in my case rather dangerous. I don't have much tolerance for people who drink a lot, and none for drunks. While I rarely drink today, I do like to use wine and liqueurs in cooking and own a good assortment.

[balmagowry]

Went on a double date with the girl across the hall, went to a bar and ended up drinking NINE 7&7s.  I kept saying I'd had seven 9&9s and thinking it was hilarious. 

Lemme guess. One of the guys on the double-date eventually became a writer for Star Trek....

[Gifted Gourmet]

Hey, Gifted Gourmet, I had my first drunk at the U. of Illinois also, in the fall of 1956. 

Finally! Someone here with whom I can identify! and over 30! Why is everyone now in their thirties?

Was at U of I in the last thrilling flowerchild LSD days of the sixties ... Aren't our good old Yippees now "suits"??

Nowadays, drinking makes me feel out of control so I avoid the stuff and simply quaff a little vin ordinaire de temps en temps...

Now, if I were going the the Emerald City of Oz, I would ask the Wizard for a new pancreas!

Edited May 7, 2004 by Gifted Gourmet (log)

[dankphishin]

My first drunk was pretty crazy, I was thirteen and visiting relatives in Montreal for Christmas vacation. New Year's Eve, there was a dinner at decent resto downtown with our whole family, relatives, friends, etc (a big crowd, about 30 or so Armenians). I quickly discovered that everytime I finished my wine glass, it was refilled. After a while, I was fairly tipsy, which my dad noticed. He proceeded to take me to the bar where I was given about 6 shots of "Amaro" (sic?), some sort of liquer, I'm not sure why this was picked. I was still heavy into the wine, and pretty drunk. I ended up going to the Armenian community center, where there was another New Year's Party, where I think I did many vodka shots, and ended up passed out, hugging the toilet. Eventually, a guy that my dad had coached in basketball took pity on me and took my drunk ass home. I slept till about five the next day, with no hangover suprisingly, though I took a lot of shit from relatives. I didn't drink for about a year after that, though nowadays at 20 I can pretty much hang with anybody (co-regional penns valley beer-bong champ my senior year of high school, plus I shoot an awesome game of Pong), though I always remember that first time.

fun fact: the Armenian equivalent of "are you drunk?" is "Kinov Es?" which transalates to "Are you with wine?"