The Ultimate Spilling Food On Yourself Topic

[suzilightning]

after digesting all the assembled knowledge here - we are off to lunch at American Grill later so i have chosen my clothing appropriatly:

tunic blouse with red and black pattern

black pants

will report back any spills perhaps with pictures

[vogelap]

I've had many a spill into the cleavage area as well. Let's just say having a napkin in my lap doesn't help much 

Have you ever considered wearing a shirt to dinner?

[vogelap]

Then, of course, the problems of fat men with cleavage.  Very, very troublesome.

Now there is an image I could have gone ALL DAY without having pop into my mind's eye.

I guess I have to gouge out my mind's eye now. Who's got a pointy stick?

[Lady T]

Are you volunteering to wash it afterward?

[vogelap]

And then there's the spring-loaded tongs that love to spring open when I'm cooking something bright red (like dipping tortillas into enchilada sauce), flinging sauce all over me, the husband, the cats, the walls, and the floor.  Lovely.

We ended up painting our kitchen blood-red to hide such tong-attacks...

See this picture!

[tejon]

I've had many a spill into the cleavage area as well. Let's just say having a napkin in my lap doesn't help much 

Have you ever considered wearing a shirt to dinner?

I knew I was forgetting something.....

[alacarte]

My father-in-law once upended a container of cottage cheese into his lap. His dear family still refers to him sometimes as "old cottage-cheese crotch."

[alacarte]

My personal worst spillage occurred during the days when I still owned a lovely silk pants suit, the color of salmon. I ate a chicken sandwich with vinaigrette sauce for lunch -- and Murphy's law, the vinaigrette dribbled down on to my lovely salmon silk jacket.

Got back to the office, and tried to use a wet paper towel to wipe away the stain. Of course, it just spread the oil mess into a large, round, permanent stain.

I wear black clothing now.

[NeroW]

And then there's the spring-loaded tongs that love to spring open when I'm cooking something bright red (like dipping tortillas into enchilada sauce), flinging sauce all over me, the husband, the cats, the walls, and the floor.  Lovely.

We ended up painting our kitchen blood-red to hide such tong-attacks...

See this picture!

I f***ing hate spring-loaded tongs.

[mamster]

I like wearing band T-shirts almost as much as listening to the band. Laurie can vouch that when we go to a show I will quickly look around for the merch table to make sure I get a shirt in my size, and then will stand there at the concert dancing and holding a shirt in my hand like a dork. If it's not deadly hot I'll put the shirt on over my existing shirt, which probably has some other band on it.

Anyway, we saw the Pernice Brothers play last month and I got this great t-shirt. It has a sandwich on it. You can see it here, but it's sold out, so nyaa. As I was buying the shirt, I thought, "Hmm...should I really buy a white shirt?" But all of their shirts were white, and hey, sandwich.

A couple of days later I'm sitting in a Vietnamese restaurant in front of a big bowl of spicy noodle soup wearing the shirt and saying to myself, "I am such an idiot." I tucked my napkin into my collar and went to work. The stains are only on the sleeves. There should be a song about this sort of thing.

[tommy]

I like wearing band T-shirts almost as much as listening to the band. Laurie can vouch that when we go to a show I will quickly look around for the merch table to make sure I get a shirt in my size, and then will stand there at the concert dancing and holding a shirt in my hand like a dork. If it's not deadly hot I'll put the shirt on over my existing shirt, which probably has some other band on it.

mrs. tommy took to slowly throwing out all of my "band" shirts. but that's another thread altogether.

[vogelap]

My father-in-law once upended a container of cottage cheese into his lap. His dear family still refers to him sometimes as "old cottage-cheese crotch."

Ah, the things that get us nicknames...

It reminds me of an old girlfriend of mine. She took me home to meet her family. Her father told me that Bonnie's nickname as a child was "poo-ball" and asked if I wanted to know why.

My response? "Hell no!"

Never did find out what that meant, but the mind boggles.

Sincerely,

Drew "Silver Sleeves" Vogel

[Lady T]

I would bet a pretty good bottle of wine that you earned Bonnie's undying gratitude and appreciation that day, Vogelap.

[Rachel Perlow]

mrs. tommy took to slowly throwing out all of my "band" shirts.  but that's another thread altogether. 

Poor tommy! I wondered why you said recently that you only had 4 band t-shirts.

Memories...

[bloviatrix]

I like wearing band T-shirts almost as much as listening to the band. Laurie can vouch that when we go to a show I will quickly look around for the merch table to make sure I get a shirt in my size, and then will stand there at the concert dancing and holding a shirt in my hand like a dork. If it's not deadly hot I'll put the shirt on over my existing shirt, which probably has some other band on it.

mrs. tommy took to slowly throwing out all of my "band" shirts. but that's another thread altogether.

I take it Mrs. Tommy doesn't realize that rock concert t-shirts from the 70s and 80s are all the rage now. People are paying obscene prices (three digits!!) to own vintage ones. Even Urban Outfitters is selling Ramones t-shirts.

My favorite band t-shirt is from The Connells. The album was called Weird Food and Devastation. It's got a Dali-like fork on it. And yes, there are food splatters on it.

[tommy]

My favorite band t-shirt is from The Connells.  The album was called Weird Food and Devastation.  It's got a Dali-like fork on it.  And yes, there are food splatters on it. 

oh jeez, i used to love the Connells, and haven't thought about them in probably 10 years.

i think we need a thread on "rock shirts with food themes". i know we did a "food song" thread, which turned out pretty impressive. i'll try to find it. here it be.

Edited August 29, 2003 by tommy (log)

[bloviatrix]

My favorite band t-shirt is from The Connells.  The album was called Weird Food and Devastation.  It's got a Dali-like fork on it.  And yes, there are food splatters on it. 

oh jeez, i used to love the Connells, and haven't thought about them in probably 10 years.

[elyse]

At a formal dinner I had strawberry sauce drop from my spoon right into my cleavage. The woman I was talking to definitely saw my faux pas and had the grace to look away quickly so I could do a quick wipe. She had amazing composure, I thought, in not cracking up laughing, which is more than I could have done if I had been in her shoes! I'll never forget her for that.

Aww she sounds like no fun. I probably would have pointed to mycleavage and asked if she wanted it.

[suzilightning]

after digesting all the assembled knowledge here - we are off to lunch at American Grill later so i have chosen my clothing appropriately:

tunic blouse with red and black pattern

black pants

will report back any spills perhaps with pictures 

so sad to quote self but...

got back and NO SPILLS

even with a long white skirt(it was too freakin muggy to wear pants), two beers, and besides the appetizer, an entree of grilled duck breast salad with bleu cheese, walnuts and a raspberry vinaigrette

though the husband's (a petite little flower) napkin was definitely the worse for wear after the bbq shrimp appetizer we shared - and he did point out - without benefit of reading this site, he was wearing black jeans so it wouldn't show anyway

[elyse]

i'm not sure if this qualifies, but back in high school, i was having dinner at a chinese restaurant with my girlfriend and her brother.  we were having a grand ol' time cracking up over various silly things.  i was laughing so hard for so long, and had drank so much tea, that all of a sudden everything came right up and onto my lap, on my white shorts.  the other customers were none too impressed as we walked out, with me covered in vomit, and laughing that much harder.

I can TOTALLY see you doing that. As a matter of fact, I think I was there.

[elyse]

I'd gone to a Japanese restaurant with a group of friends, two of which were going to try to teach me to use chopsticks.  I wound up lobbing a piece of California roll at =Mark's head, while another piece bounced off the my boobies and back onto the plate.

Everyone laughed at my obvious lack of hand-eye coordination.

But you ARE quite boobi dextrous.

[canoodle]

First post here...

Eating bowl of Thai curry...phone rings. Run (with bowl in hand) to catch the #$%@# phone. Slip on a puddle of water that the dog has slopped onto the floor. Grasp bowl firmly to the chest. Miss the phone call, but don't spill a drop of the precious curry. And believe it or not, only 1 small spot on my shirt! Check the caller I.D.- F@#%$ing telemarketer.

[HungryChris]

Now what does that have to do with large breasts?

[elyse]

Be kind, Chris, she's new.

[Toliver]

First post here...

Eating bowl of Thai curry...phone rings. Run (with bowl in hand) to catch the #$%@# phone. Slip on a puddle of water that the dog has slopped onto the floor. Grasp bowl firmly to the chest. Miss the phone call, but don't spill a drop of the precious curry. And believe it or not, only 1  small spot on my shirt!    Check the caller I.D.- F@#%$ing telemarketer.

Two words for ya: Call Screening.

And welcome canoodle!