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Favorite/Least Favorite Food "Celebrities"


erraticninja

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Winner of the "I'd Like to Feed You Haggis, Black Pudding, and Menudo Not Because They're Bad But Because You're Mad" Award:

The Christina of a loathesome "food" program called Christina Cooks.  In the happy event you've never encountered this show, all I can is, you are indeed fortunate.  Equal parts nutrition psuedoscience, bizarre flavor combinations, and a cooking philosophy shivering in a cellar of deprivation, guilt, and fear of fat, this program is one I can't even watch for laughs.  She reminds us all that establishing Vegetable Protective Services (VPS) may be necessary in a world that allows her on the public airwaves.  ("Anyone who treats parsnips the way you do, ma'am, shouldn't be allowed to cook with them.)

Quite agree. The woman is barking mad.

She continuously makes absurd statements like, "Because broccoli is straight it helps strengthen the spine."

She's macrobiotics at its most stark raving.

"I've caught you Richardson, stuffing spit-backs in your vile maw. 'Let tomorrow's omelets go empty,' is that your fucking attitude?" -E. B. Farnum

"Behold, I teach you the ubermunch. The ubermunch is the meaning of the earth. Let your will say: the ubermunch shall be the meaning of the earth!" -Fritzy N.

"It's okay to like celery more than yogurt, but it's not okay to think that batter is yogurt."

Serving fine and fresh gratuitous comments since Oct 5 2001, 09:53 PM

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So... Where is this program? I haven't been watching much FTVN lately so I am not up with the latest shows. I want to check her out so I can throw things at the TV.

Linda LaRose aka "fifi"

"Having spent most of my life searching for truth in the excitement of science, I am now in search of the perfectly seared foie gras without any sweet glop." Linda LaRose

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Fifi, she's on PBS.

"I've caught you Richardson, stuffing spit-backs in your vile maw. 'Let tomorrow's omelets go empty,' is that your fucking attitude?" -E. B. Farnum

"Behold, I teach you the ubermunch. The ubermunch is the meaning of the earth. Let your will say: the ubermunch shall be the meaning of the earth!" -Fritzy N.

"It's okay to like celery more than yogurt, but it's not okay to think that batter is yogurt."

Serving fine and fresh gratuitous comments since Oct 5 2001, 09:53 PM

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I'd like to revise and extend my previous remarks...

Paula Deen (FoodTV) and her laugh/cackle drive me nuts. Surely she must be drinking before and during each show since everything seems to be amusing to her, then...out comes the cackle.

She sounds like someone pissed off a chicken.

 

“Peter: Oh my god, Brian, there's a message in my Alphabits. It says, 'Oooooo.'

Brian: Peter, those are Cheerios.”

– From Fox TV’s “Family Guy”

 

Tim Oliver

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I believ that I like more then I dislike. A chef at cooking school told me he can learn from even the most inane cooking show:

Like: Jacques Pepin, Micheal Chiarello, Julia Child, Bourdain (although I think some posters kiss his ass way too much), Nigella Lawson, Jamie Oliver (I like the dishes he makes and the music), Anna Olson, Sarah Moulden and even Martha Stewart (great geusts).

Dislike: Lagasse, Puck, Brown, and Food TV Canada chefs Michael Smith, Carlo Rota, Kathleen Daehlman, and smarmy Alton Brown. Also everyone on Cooking School Diaries.

David Cooper

"I'm no friggin genius". Rob Dibble

http://www.starlinebyirion.com/

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  • 2 weeks later...

Likes

1. Julia Child

2. Tony Bourdain -- For all the reasons stated in above posts, plus whatahunk!

3. Alton Brown -- Phew! Glad it's OK to say that now

4. Graham Kerr from the 1960s -- He and Julia sparked my interest in cooking. I'd fake being sick so I could stay home from grade school and watch their cooking shows.

5. Nigella Lawson -- Lovely food porn

6. Jacques Pepin -- What great chemistry with Julia Child! I love his recipes, and admire that he doesn't always take the high road. His healthy- and quick-cooking books are terrific.

Dislikes

1. Jeff Smith -- So patronizing! The cloying political correctness! The pedophilia! The bad recipes! Fuckwit.

2. The Cooks Illustrated team -- Deer caught in the headlights...anal retentive deer.

3. The Ewok -- too loud

4. The Sober Graham Kerr

5. Martha Stewart -- Such anger under the surface...

On The Fence

1. Rachael Ray -- Come on, it's a show for newbie cooks! I set the bar lower for her. I like to watch her make mistakes and dole out bad advice. I love how she handles raw chicken, then soaps her hands and immediately dives them under the running water before rubbing them together, like a 3-year old who just potty-trained. I admire that she can be so unabashedly dorky. I find it sad and pathetic that she is all alone up there.

2. Sara Moulton -- Overexposed, but I like her recipes

3. Jamie Oliver -- Hey, folks, he is hard to understand because he has a wicked underbite. I like his enthusiasm and his ADHD, in small doses.

4. Mario Batali -- What a great teacher! Yet, I find it hard to watch his shows. I think he must be better in person.

5. Ina Garten -- I loved it when she made fresh lemonade, then added that "Some of us will want to put vodka in it"

(edited to correct a word)

Edited by Lita (log)
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  • 2 weeks later...
A word about the the Barefoot Contessa (who appeared on someone's dis list), anyone who could get $20 for a pound of potato salad in the mid-eighties is all right with me.

Speaking of Ina Garten... I've found her to be by far the most useful cook I've ever come across. I've tried about 40 of her recipes so far and I'd say about 10 of them were phemonemal from the first try, about 20 were very good or great, about 5 came out good only after the first try (or when I got lazy and fudged steps) and the remaining few I just didn't care for.

I find her cooking to be very approachable for my guests, and her recipes to be definitive (I've done her brownies about 20 times now, they came out perfect all but once (I overcooked) and people love them to the point of demanding them. Ditto for the Ginger Chicken, the Guacamole, and a few other recipes.

Is it going to ooh and aah foodies? No way. But my guests love this food anyway, so she's OK in my book.

But yes, only an idiot would buy her salads at her store.

Edited by laurenmilan (log)

"Give me 8 hours, 3 people, wine, conversation and natural ingredients and I'll give you one of the best nights in your life. Outside of this forum - there would be no takers."- Wine_Dad, egullet.org

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Speaking of Ina Garten... I've found her to be by far the most useful cook I've ever come across.<snip>

Lauren, I picked up her Family Style cookbook recently and have been catching her show more regularly, and I would move her to my favorite list.

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Speaking of Ina Garten... I've found her to be by far the most useful cook I've ever come across.<snip>

Lauren, I picked up her Family Style cookbook recently and have been catching her show more regularly, and I would move her to my favorite list.

That's the only book of hers I do not have yet (although I've probably done 8 recipes from that book that have appeared on her show so far... try the banana pumpkin mousse tart sometime.)

I'm actually cooking through the original Barefoot Contessa book these days, a la "Julie/Julia Project". But unlike Julie, the recipes aren't making me a nervous wreck....

"Give me 8 hours, 3 people, wine, conversation and natural ingredients and I'll give you one of the best nights in your life. Outside of this forum - there would be no takers."- Wine_Dad, egullet.org

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I've tried about 40 of her recipes so far...

Which cookbook are you cooking from?

 

“Peter: Oh my god, Brian, there's a message in my Alphabits. It says, 'Oooooo.'

Brian: Peter, those are Cheerios.”

– From Fox TV’s “Family Guy”

 

Tim Oliver

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Favs:

Bourdain: Of course, but damn it, why the cutesy post-production crap in the second season? At least there's not much of it.

Brown: Bill Nye for food. I don't give a rat's ass if he's a bastard in private, though I don't know that he is. I don't listen music played by saints or watch a movie because the director is a cool guy.

The lady on America's Test Kitchen: She apparently does all the work and puts up with the anal-retentive master baker Kimball. And what they reproduce in their books is good stuff.

David Uygar: Not really a celebrity, but he his to me. Read this. He's making food at Lola's Tasting Room of the quality I've had at places like Trotter's, Danko, and French Laundry, but at $75 for a 15 course tasting menu. Dallas people are quite lucky to have them. You'd be lucky to have a 3 hour layover at DFW some evening and be able to sneak in.

Rising in Estimation:

Bobby Flay: His NY (sorry all you NYers, but you know its true) attitude grated on me on Hot Off the Grill, but FoodNation and Boy Meets Grill actually have merit and he seems to have lightened up over time. And you have to admit he gets some really hot women on Hot Off the Grill. I still don't know if he can cook. He seems to bring the worst of fusion to his food, putting chiles and honey on everything. That's like the Chinese equivalent of putting sweet and sour sauce on everything.

Least Favs:

Tyler Florence: This guy must have never had a woman before he was on TV. He's so horny for every semi-attractive woman he has on his shows, I imagine they can never shoot him from the waist down for fear of the sensors (and parents writing to complain because they had to explain to their children why Tyler's mis en place includes a banana in his pants). The very worst was his trip to Mexico. I don't speak good Spanish, but his was like the audible equivalent of Durian perfume.

Batali: He slams a lot of info into a half hour of Molto Mario, but his Italy show was terribly bogged down in bad comedy. He can't seem to just relax and let the experts show him what they do on Ciao America, either. He has to be in charge. And the way he treated those kids that he was supposedly "giving a chance" to prove themselves was horrendous.

Emeril: I don't mind the BAM, the entertainment value, or the band. But the religious fervor from the holy boilers in the crowd has got to go. You'd think people were going to start standing in the aisles speaking in tongues: "50 cloves of garlic", "A little essence"... And for goodness sakes, show the damn food, not the top of Emerils incredible shrinking pelt.

Caprial: She's from my hometown and her restaurant is one of the best in the city. But damn she lacks charisma and actually makes her food look worse than it really is. And when her and her husband get together it makes me want to puke. They're the culinary equivalent of the Grumpy Old Men.

Wolfgang Puck: Meeztah Puck, pleeeez, go take yoor fake Hollyvood attitood and mediocre meelz bahk to Austria. Or at leezt keep it in Calee-for-nee-ah. Pleez, don't be bahk.

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I've tried about 40 of her recipes so far...

Which cookbook are you cooking from?

I'm cooking from the original Barefoot Contessa book.

"Give me 8 hours, 3 people, wine, conversation and natural ingredients and I'll give you one of the best nights in your life. Outside of this forum - there would be no takers."- Wine_Dad, egullet.org

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Every weekday from 1:30-2:00 pm, our local PBS station has a cooking show; different rotation every day of the week.

Wednesdays is Julia and Jacques, which I always watch.

Monday's is Graham Kerr. Hands down, the most annoying of the bunch.

Susan Fahning aka "snowangel"
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Faves: Tony (I don't read as well as that guy writes), Alton, Nigella, the gang on Cook Like a Chef (including Caroline McCann-Bizjak, my current culinary object of lust - accents, ass pants and full-fat French cooking. I'm a simple man). Torres, Pepin, Julia. I like Michael Smith a lot, too.

Not so faves: Oliver, Rob Feenie (solely on personality, 'cause the food is amazing), Batali, Florence.

If their gut was on fire, I wouldn't piss down their throat to put it out: Emeril, Flay, Martha, Rainford.

Actually, my brother and I have an Emeril drinking game. Every time he bends down towards the camera and you see his bald spot, you take a drink.

Todd McGillivray

"I still throw a few back, talk a little smack, when I'm feelin' bulletproof..."

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  • 2 weeks later...

hmmm my favs:

Tony - he's a knucklehead... and the coolest....

Thomas Keller - a twisted genius in the kitchen ...

Jacques Torres - awesome......

Alton Brown - the McGiver of the kitchen

Mario Batali - the guy can cook and drink you under the table....

my least favs:

Jamie Oliver - well....someones future prison bitch

Emeril.....can go bam himself.....

sara......she's ok .....just boring

Bobby Flay......the boy with the silver spoon...and his ho Jackie

JTL

Is a Member of PETA..."People Eating Tasty Animals"

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Have to say I'm loving Ina Garten. She's like Nigella Lawson and Nathan Lane rolled into one.

All her food looks terrific and she's very cute. The program has a nice calm pace quite like the British cooking shows.

I love the way she says " faaabulous!" :smile:

She's someone I'd love to cook with: "Ina, please pass me those faaabulous cucumbers..."

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Faves: Tony (I don't read as well as that guy writes), Alton, Nigella, the gang on Cook Like a Chef (including Caroline McCann-Bizjak, my current culinary object of lust - accents, ass pants and full-fat French cooking. I'm a simple man). Torres, Pepin, Julia. I like Michael Smith a lot, too.

And you a man of the (table)cloth and all....

But really? This lady? Do you see what I see? I'm not saying she's unattractive, just looks like I wouldn't want her waving a spatula at me. She might be able to play linebacker in the Canadian Football League. Have any better pics?

mccann.jpg

Edited by ExtraMSG (log)
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Chef's jackets aren't that flattering.

I met Caroline McCann-Bizjak when she was working in New York and you would be hard pressed to find a more beautiful, charming, and competent chef (not food personality, chef) in North America. In person, she's a major stunner.

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But really?  This lady?  Do you see what I see?  I'm not saying she's unattractive, just looks like I wouldn't want her waving a spatula at me.  She might be able to play linebacker in the Canadian Football League.  Have any better pics?

mccann.jpg

That's an lousy picture, no doubt, but I'd still say she's quite appealing from that photo alone.

I'd be happy to have her scramble my eggs. :wub:

Edited by hillbill (log)
Gustatory illiterati in an illuminati land.
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Caroline Mc ann -Bizjack was invloved in one episode of Opening Soon ( FTV Canada production). She and Ned Bell were hired as co chefs by some Ontario wine maker (sounds like I'm making this up) in a new restaurant. On the follow up show that started this season it seems he fired them both because of thier constant fighting about who was more important. She now pimps Canadian Gouda in commercials on the telly. Perhaps she see's herself as a bit of a celeb now.

David Cooper

"I'm no friggin genius". Rob Dibble

http://www.starlinebyirion.com/

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Giada's head is too big for her body. Not that that has anything to do with her cooking ability. I don't know much about that, as her show annoys me and I don't watch it much. Seems like she's trying to be Nigella, and she emotes too much.

One time I did watch Giada, when she made savory cookies with Locatelli, I believe, and rosemary. They looked very good. I'd like to try that recipe. Has anyone ? What do you think?

I do enjoy Nigella, but I've had it up to here with the reruns! Could we please have some new Nigella?!

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