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The Worst Review Ever?


CooksQuest

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He is right. The standard for cooking food at the Oyster Bar is really not that high. It is a standard that was acceptable in the old days at New York/New England style fish restaurants. These days they would be better served getting a serious fish chef who updated the cuisine. For example, there is no reason that the Oyster Bar can't serve a world class sole meuniere. Where I disagree with Grimes is that the actual oyster bar, including derivitive dishes like pan roasts and stews, are so good that it merits a star. Especially in light of two stars for Babbo.

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i'm getting the feeling that "worst review ever" is being misunderstood here. by me as well. i think cooksquest is saying that he gave the place a bad review, as opposed to his review was bad. although i'd like him to confirm that, as i really have no idea what i'm talking about. but if it's the former, i agree with fatguy. he summed up my feelings on the place practically to the letter.

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and maybe i just don't get it, but those pan roasts are horrible.  thick, gummy, raw tasting.  yuck.

The oyster pan roast at City Hall is in every way superior to the one at the Oyster Bar. Does any place else in town still make them?

Chief Scientist / Amateur Cook

MadVal, Seattle, WA

Proud signatory to the eG Ethics code

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i think cooksquest is saying that he gave the place a bad review, as opposed to his review was bad.

That's what I meant. A bad review for Oyster Bar...

Not the quality of the review itself.

Sorry for any confusion.

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(If you want, we can change the title of the thread - how about "Best bad review ever?" err, is that just as confusing?)

For what it's worth, the only thing I've ever heard about the Oyster Bar is to only sit at the counter and eat raw oysters, never sit at a table and eat other food. Since I don't like raw oysters, I've never been.

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(If you want, we can change the title of the thread - how about "Best bad review ever?" err, is that just as confusing?)

The confusion is actually kind of funny. I should have realized that eGulleters would want to analyze the quality/accuracy of the review itself. I wonder if other major NYC restaurants have received such scathing reviews.

Yeah, that's it. The title should have been Most Scathing Review Ever...

:-)

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On December 27, 2000 he reviewed Hudson Cafeteria and the words "toxic waste" came up.

That was lovably mean-spirited. This is what he said:

"The Jell-O arrives in a large Coke glass, topped with a cloud of whipped cream and dotted with a cherry. After several moments devoted to admiration, someone, inevitably, dips in with a long-handled spoon and actually tastes the thing. That's when ooh and aah turns into ugh. I don't know what toxic waste tastes like, but I am prepared to say that serving it chilled would not improve the flavor."

Matthew Amster-Burton, aka "mamster"

Author, Hungry Monkey, coming in May

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Grimes really showed today why he is the critic and I, for one, am not. The Oyster Bar is one of mine, and obviously Grimes', favorite restaurants. It is across the street from my office and if I am not too busy, I often find myself at the counter digging into a pan roast. For me, there are few dining experiences that so completely sum up what NY is all about. For that reason, I could never give a bad review to the Oyster Bar -- far too many good memories there.

Perhaps the weakness in the piece was not dividing the review up into three separate reviews, as the Oyster Bar is really three different restaurants. You have the lunch counter (three stars in my book), the restaurant (no stars -- I agree with Grimes here) and the Saloon (one star -- for the drinks).

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We always hurt the ones we love.

"I've caught you Richardson, stuffing spit-backs in your vile maw. 'Let tomorrow's omelets go empty,' is that your fucking attitude?" -E. B. Farnum

"Behold, I teach you the ubermunch. The ubermunch is the meaning of the earth. Let your will say: the ubermunch shall be the meaning of the earth!" -Fritzy N.

"It's okay to like celery more than yogurt, but it's not okay to think that batter is yogurt."

Serving fine and fresh gratuitous comments since Oct 5 2001, 09:53 PM

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I've always taken on those who pan either of Philadelphia's Bookbinders. At Bookbinders there are only three things to order. Snapper Soup, oysters on the half shell, and lobster. Make a meal of these and you'll do quite well for yourself. Order anything else and you're asking for trouble, and a bad meal.

Seems that's the same for the Oyster Bar. I can't imagine going past the counter. I go to the Oyster Bar it's for raw oysters and oyster stew.

The review is undoubtably accurate. And the Oyster Bar, itself, chose to exceed its capabilites. But I would have preferred if Grimes had developed the first three paragraphs more and at some point merely said "they serve other stuff too; don't order it."

Holly Moore

"I eat, therefore I am."

HollyEats.Com

Twitter

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But ordering a plain piece of broiled fish is not bad, and really merits a star given what he typically gives stars to. It's when they start saucing the fish that they start screwing up. But their smoked fish platter is good, and they have those shrimps that are deep fried in rice batter flour (which City Hall makes as well) which are also good. It's just that their is lots of bad too. I also happen to hate the space. To me it feels like you're eating in the subway.

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Also, the great seasonal specialities like the Matjes herring and stone crabs are an important part of the restaurant.

Holly, that's how I'd have written it: Your guide to getting the most out of the Oyster Bar. But I'm not Grimes and I don't have to give stars. Another example of how the need to provide a star rating handicaps the reviewer.

Steven A. Shaw aka "Fat Guy"
Co-founder, Society for Culinary Arts & Letters, sshaw@egstaff.org
Proud signatory to the eG Ethics code
Director, New Media Studies, International Culinary Center (take my food-blogging course)

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The bouillabaisse, another house specialty, is a crime against nature, a pathetic assembly of mussels and whitefish redeemed somewhat by a flavorful lobster tail that cannot, unfortunately, distract from the anemic broth, as weak as tea. The rouille, meant to be slathered on the cold, stale rounds of toast provided, is like a bad joke. It reminded me of pimento spread.

edit:

It might be a good idea to offer jicama slaw as a substitution for Key lime pie, which, as an abomination, gives the bouillabaisse a run for its money. The filling has a chemical, almost bitter taste so appalling that it fascinates.

I would truly hate to read this guy on a day when he was feeling mean.

Nick

Edited by Nick Gatti (log)
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I should add, I don't think the Oyster Bar is the best place for oysters. Especially at lunchtime, the oysters are pre-shucked and handled roughly. I think you'll do better at, for example, Aquagrill.

Steven A. Shaw aka "Fat Guy"
Co-founder, Society for Culinary Arts & Letters, sshaw@egstaff.org
Proud signatory to the eG Ethics code
Director, New Media Studies, International Culinary Center (take my food-blogging course)

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I've always enjoyed the oysters at The Oyster Bar. I've never had the pan roast, but I've found the clam chowder less than clam flavored and made too rich with too much cream for my taste. I've only tried other cooked food once. The desserts look no better than the ones one sees in luncheonettes and dinner refrigerators. The only thing I will vouch for here is the fresh herring that arrives from the Netherlands late every May. The season lasts for a few weeks at best. It was a serious omission from a review that otherwise offers good advice.

Robert Buxbaum

WorldTable

Recent WorldTable posts include: comments about reporting on Michelin stars in The NY Times, the NJ proposal to ban foie gras, Michael Ruhlman's comments in blogs about the NJ proposal and Bill Buford's New Yorker article on the Food Network.

My mailbox is full. You may contact me via worldtable.com.

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