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RIP member joiei


Chris Hennes

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I've received word that Larry Gober, a.k.a. @joiei, died in his sleep yesterday afternoon: he was diagnosed with stage 4 esophageal cancer in October. I knew Larry away from the forums as a fellow Oklahoman, a passionate barbecue advocate, and the kind of guy who would randomly mail me fresh corn flour because "he knew a guy." We'll miss you, Larry!

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Chris Hennes
Director of Operations
chennes@egullet.org

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Oh, I'm sorry for this news. He seemed like a nice guy from his posts. @Jaymes recommended that I look him up when we were passing through Oklahoma, precisely because he had a kind heart and was interesting in person. We were always in too much of a hurry while passing through the state for me to try. Now I won't have the chance.

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Nancy Smith, aka "Smithy"
HosteG Forumsnsmith@egstaff.org

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"Every day should be filled with something delicious, because life is too short not to spoil yourself. " -- Ling (with permission)
"There comes a time in every project when you have to shoot the engineer and start production." -- author unknown

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I've been pretty absent from the site but logged in today to look something up. I greatly enjoyed Larry's company the day we had an Oklahoma meet-up for a barbecue tour. I was going to smoke pork country (loin) ribs on my gas grill for dinner tonight but we have workers in the yard making that awkward. I logged in to explore a CSO option instead. 

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Oh, gosh.   I wish his family and friends great healing.  I am so sorry when we were out west I wasn't able to meet up with him and cylexa.  

Nothing is better than frying in lard.

Nothing.  Do not quote me on this.

 

Linda Ellerbee

Take Big Bites

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He was as kind and generous a man as ever drew breath. When I moved to Springfield MO to help my father take care of my mother who was dying of Alzheimer's, Larry, who lived just down the road in Tulsa, began suggesting that we meet up at various locations in between. Larry and I drove all over the central midwest. They were such pleasant and welcome breaks from the difficulty of my family situation. 

 

I was planning another road trip north from south Texas when he got his diagnosis. Selfishly, I wish he could have prolonged his life just for a little while so I could have seen him one last time. But he chose to depart his way, eschewing chemo and other extraordinary interventions, and just leave this world the way he came into it, letting nature take its course. The world has lost a dear, dear man. And I've lost a dear, dear friend. I am bereft.

Edited by Jaymes (log)
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I don't understand why rappers have to hunch over while they stomp around the stage hollering.  It hurts my back to watch them. On the other hand, I've been thinking that perhaps I should start a rap group here at the Old Folks' Home.  Most of us already walk like that.

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On 1/8/2020 at 1:11 AM, Jaymes said:

Selfishly, I wish he could have prolonged his life just for a little while so I could have seen him one last time. But he chose to depart his way, eschewing chemo and other extraordinary interventions, and just leave this world the way he came into it, letting nature take its course.

 

That's a shame. I lost my father a couple of years ago to the same cause, and in the same fashion.

 

After the diagnosis he spent no small mental effort tracing his way back to the earliest symptoms, and kicking himself for not having it looked at then. The oncologist told him pretty bluntly not to do that, saying "By the time there's a symptom you might have noticed, it's already too late. The only thing that would have changed is we'd have all felt obligated to take our shot at treating it and slowing the cancer down, and your last couple of years would have been a lot more miserable."

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“Who loves a garden, loves a greenhouse too.” - William Cowper, The Task, Book Three

 

"Not knowing the scope of your own ignorance is part of the human condition...The first rule of the Dunning-Kruger club is you don’t know you’re a member of the Dunning-Kruger club.” - psychologist David Dunning

 

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10 hours ago, chromedome said:

 

I lost my father a couple of years ago to the same cause, and in the same fashion.

 

After the diagnosis he spent no small mental effort tracing his way back to the earliest symptoms, and kicking himself for not having it looked at then. The oncologist told him pretty bluntly not to do that, saying "By the time there's a symptom you might have noticed, it's already too late. The only thing that would have changed is we'd have all felt obligated to take our shot at treating it and slowing the cancer down, and your last couple of years would have been a lot more miserable."

 


Thanks, chromedome.  These are words to read and reread and reread and reread.   

 

And thanks to joiei for making them relevant.    Rest in gentle peace.

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eGullet member #80.

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4 hours ago, Shelby said:

Here is Larry's obituary.  He sounds like a wonderful man.

 

 

 

That is a wonderful and touching obituary. I especially love the last paragraph recommending a meal in his honor, with family and/or friends. Thank you, Shelby, for the link.

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Nancy Smith, aka "Smithy"
HosteG Forumsnsmith@egstaff.org

Follow us on social media! Facebook; instagram.com/egulletx; twitter.com/egullet

"Every day should be filled with something delicious, because life is too short not to spoil yourself. " -- Ling (with permission)
"There comes a time in every project when you have to shoot the engineer and start production." -- author unknown

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