• Welcome to the eG Forums, a service of the eGullet Society for Culinary Arts & Letters. The Society is a 501(c)3 not-for-profit organization dedicated to the advancement of the culinary arts. These advertising-free forums are provided free of charge through donations from Society members. Anyone may read the forums, but to post you must create an account.

Darienne

I will never again . . . (Part 4)

310 posts in this topic

On Valentine's Day night about 5 years ago I was slicing French bread with a knife that I've since named "The Biter". I dropped the knife and (stupidly) tried to catch it. I sliced the end off of my middle left finger. I didn't go to the hospital, but I guess I should have. That's the closest I've ever come to fainting. I still have no feeling in it. My husband doesn't let me touch that knife any more. :unsure:

Some knives, once they taste blood, never lose the taste for it. My microplane has a similar predilection.

Maybe we should introduce them. :laugh:

Good Lord, NO! They might breed! :shock::laugh:


"Commit random acts of senseless kindness"

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

My microplane has a similar predilection.

As does mine... it took a surprisingly large chunk of skin off of my middle finger on Saturday night. It's still bothering me too - typing is awkward and uncomfortable.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

On Valentine's Day night about 5 years ago I was slicing French bread with a knife that I've since named "The Biter". I dropped the knife and (stupidly) tried to catch it. I sliced the end off of my middle left finger. I didn't go to the hospital, but I guess I should have. That's the closest I've ever come to fainting. I still have no feeling in it. My husband doesn't let me touch that knife any more. :unsure:

Some knives, once they taste blood, never lose the taste for it. My microplane has a similar predilection.

Maybe we should introduce them. :laugh:

Good Lord, NO! They might breed! :shock::laugh:

*shudder*

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I was testing a mandoline for a local manufacturer/importer of sharpeners who is expanding into edged tools (not knives, but everything else). He warned me -- repeatedly -- not to use it without the guard. I was entranced with cutting 1/32 of an inch slices of tomato, and removed the guard; somehow, I managed to slice a dime-sized piece of skin and flesh from the underside of the middle finger of my right hand, between second knuckle and palm. Bled like a sonofagun. And my finger was stiff for two weeks while it healed.


Don't ask. Eat it.

www.kayatthekeyboard.wordpress.com

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

That's it. I am *never* buying a mandoline. My mother offered to buy me one years ago, and I turned her down, wanting to save her money, but the real savings was in flesh and blood -- my own. Misshaped potato chips are far preferable to misshaped fingers. :shock:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

That's it. I am *never* buying a mandoline. My mother offered to buy me one years ago, and I turned her down, wanting to save her money, but the real savings was in flesh and blood -- my own. Misshaped potato chips are far preferable to misshaped fingers. :shock:

Or you could buy a kevlar glove - that way you can have safe fingers and use a mandoline.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

That's it. I am *never* buying a mandoline. My mother offered to buy me one years ago, and I turned her down, wanting to save her money, but the real savings was in flesh and blood -- my own. Misshaped potato chips are far preferable to misshaped fingers. :shock:

Or you could buy a kevlar glove - that way you can have safe fingers and use a mandoline.

Or, unless you are slicing truffles, just prepare a little more of the vegetable than you need and toss the ends into the stock pot. In other words waste a little vegetable rather than getting too close to the blade.


Anna Nielsen aka "Anna N"

...I just let people know about something I made for supper that they might enjoy, too. That's all it is. (Nigel Slater)

"Never call a stomach a tummy without good reason.” William Strunk Jr., The Elements of Style

Our 2012 (Kerry Beal and me) Blog

My 2004 eG Blog

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I worked on a melon farm in Israel, our kitchen was an old school bus. We boiled stocks pots of water for Turkish coffee every morning before work. One day I was sitting on the table with the burners and the full pots boiling behind me and someone jumped up on the table to sit next to me. The floor was rotten, the table leg fell through, she jumped right, out of the way of the water which all poured down my left leg. Third degree burn covered my left calf and butt cheek.

I will spare you all the story of what is what like to be in the hospital in Israel for a week when the whole thing got infected.

Also once dropped a whole full sized aluminum foil that fell out of the short side of the broken box and landed on my big toe, which broke, and had to sit on a stool on the line at work poaching 150 floating islands for a catering before I could go home. My whole foot turned purple up to my ankle.


Reb

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm not sure if I can even explain this, but I was in the kitchen barefoot (which we always tell our students is a bad thing, but which I do all the time anyway) and moved a couple of plates out of my way, not realizing there was a fork wedged in between them. It fell out and somehow landed so that it pierced the inside of my big toe. I couldn't figure out why my toe hurt so bad, because when I looked at the top of my foot I couldn't see anything. Then I saw the blood from the puncture wound, which was pretty deep for a damned fork. I also now have a giant bruise as well as the puncture. I should probably start wearing shoes in the kitchen.


Janet A. Zimmerman, aka "JAZ"
Manager
jzimmerman@eGullet.org
eG Ethics signatory
Author, The Healthy Pressure Cooker Cookbook and All About Cooking for Two

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I've cut off the tip of my thumb on 2 separate occasions.

Been burned up my entire right arm by 500* oil.

Butterflied the fingerprint part of my index finger.

Set my hair on fire when I was cleaning behind a fryer and the fan clicked on.

And countless others.

The first things I tell new hires at any place I'm in charge is: #1 The most important thing in the kitchen is food safety - it is more important than your health. #2 If you drop a knife, put your hands in the air and take a step back - knives are expensive, but fingers cost more.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I cut my pinky finger really deeply while trying to "pry" a piece of frozen meat apart with a knife that (thankfully) wasn't all that sharp (or I would have lost the end of a finger). the kitchen looked like a crime scene by the time I got the short distance to the sink. I got the bleeding to stop and didn't think much of it until I went to the doctor for my yearly physical a week later and she said "that could probably have used some stitches". I still have sensation but I also have a pretty good scar across that pinky.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Another barefoot in the kitchen victim here. Once opened the door of overstuffed freezer to have a frozen solid 24 oz block of West Virginia Bacon slip out and fall immediately onto the top of my right foot. Very painful, perfectly rectangular shaped bruise but luckily no broken bones. Also have a particular spot on my right forearm that always hits the top oven rack.


"The main thing to remember about Italian food is that when you put your groceries in the car, the quality of your dinner has already been decided." – Mario Batali

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Also have a particular spot on my right forearm that always hits the top oven rack.

This is a constant one with me. People give me the strangest looks out in public when I am wearing short sleeves....

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

One of my first days at a michelin starred restaurant that shall remain unknown, I was making potato coins on a mandolin with no guard on(spare me the lecture) I was trying to be talkative and get to know my staff quickly, I was furiously cutting these potatoes, and ended up taking a large chunk of skin out of my index finger.

nobody knew what happened, I immediately picked up the mandoline, dropped it off at dish, went to the office, proceeded to find as much gauze, tape, and finger condoms as I could and spent the next 20-30 minutes attempting to stop the bleeding and get it wrapped. Which inevitably led to me cauterizing it with a grill spatula and finger condom for the rest of the day.

The only questions I got was.. .why were you in the bathroom for 20 minutes? Which I left a bowel movement as my excuse.


A vision without action is a Daydream; Action without vision is a Nightmare.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Left the upper cabinet door over the fridge open, opened the fridge, leaned over to pull something out, straighened up and brained myself on the corner of the door. Really did see stars! :wacko:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Got my kitchen wound at 13. I was opening a can of soup and left the lid attached by a tiny bit. The lid was sticking straight up and I went to twist it off and instead my left thumb slid right across the edge somehow. If it weren't for my nail, I'd have sliced the whole thing off about a half inch from the tip. I grew up in a rural area and it was a half hour drive to the hospital and I've never seen my Dad that freaked out.

The most recent one was also because of barefoot cooking and sharp edges. I was using my food processor and had put the blade on the counter while I cleaned out the bowl. I knocked it off the counter and did jump back, but it ricocheted and hit the top of my big toe. I could see white underneath all the blood, so I knew the cut was pretty deep so I wrapped it up as best as I could, shoved my feet into my most forgiving shoes and went off to the hospital.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Today playing with dry ice I licked the spoon that was in the bowl the dry ice used to be in and had to rip it off.

My cheek's bleeding, my tongue hurts, and I can't taste.

:(


Edited by AaronM (log)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

It's like sticking your tongue to a frozen pole times a million!

I have a numb spot on my finger from cutting it down to the bone while chopping carrots at age 10 with my parents super crappy knives, I asked for a decent chef's knife for my 11th birthday!


If you ate pasta and antipasto, would you still be hungry? ~Author Unknown

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I take full blame for some of my injuries.. stabbing the meaty area between thumb and forefinger 45 mins before service (only time I had to go to the ER since the sucker refused to stop "spurting" out), the four 5" burn lines on my forearm from my time spent working with a wood burning oven with a small aperture that are oddly somewhat evenly spaced, several odd looking fingertips that have been introduced to "The B*tch" (my Matfer Mandoline), etc..

But I blame the "mark" on my foot on the individual that opened the steam valve on a 60G steam kettle right as I was walking by and all the steam condensed inside my Birki (I had to go see the resort's nurse so it technically wasn't an ER) and the small notch on my ear on the idiot that forgot to transfer the vodka to a plastic container and poured out of the glass bottle while sauteing some scallops.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Once upon a time when I was newly married, I was tidying up the kitchen after breakfast while wearing a kimono with wide sleeves. I turned around and the cuff of my sleeve caught the handle of my Melitta coffee pot and dashed it to the floor where it shattered in a million pieces including one large jagged one that pierced the top of my foot between my great and second toe. (Another entry in the "Wear Shoes in the Kitchen" Tales.) Naturally, blood started pumping out of my foot and onto the floor while I tried to tie it up with a tea towel so I didn't track blood all over the rug as I limped upstairs to wash it off and to call my husband. We only had one car and he had already left for work. Thirty minutes later, he had returned home to find me and my newborn son both bawling our eyes out and the bathroom looking like a scene from CSI: Philadelphia (where we lived at the time). I ended up with five stitches and a new coffee maker.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Two big ones here... one me, one DH (but I had to deal with his)

We remodeled our kitchen and installed a new LP gas cooktop (replacing an electric one). I kept telling DH something wasn't right! He said it was fine and I was :wacko: One night I turned on a burner and it went WHOOSH! Caught the edge of my Tshirt sleeve and caught me on fire! Thankfully, DH was standing nearby and put me out. But, I had one heck of a burn in my armpit! Called the appliance peeps back and sure enough... they'd hooked my cooktop up to LP using the natural gas valves.

A few years later, DH was recovering from back surgery and was a leetle beet drugged up (whacked out). I had two big slow cookers bubbling away with chicken parts to make stew for a sick dog. I still don't know what DH thought he was doing, but he managed to dump BOTH pots/lids/contents onto the floor. Everything basically exploded... greasy chicken and liquid and glass from ceiling to floor and everything in between. No serious injuries, but it took me weeks to get it all cleaned up. I just kept finding pieces of chicken, greasy spots, shards of glass, etc.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Years ago, young child running around, I was baking cherry pie, I reached to open the oven door with my mitt on hand, but reached BARE hand into oven, it pulled out the pie, and stuck to the cherry juice....I was screaming and trying to shake it off...child started laughing thinking I was trying to be funny. Emergency room and hour or so later, I was so full of pain meds I didn't care! But have been oh so careful since then with ovens. I am, however, constantly (since I am short) burning my arm on upper oven rack as I pull something out.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

DH set himself on fire this morning. Was wearing a fleece and turned his back on the gas burner, the bottom of the fleece kind of flared out when he turned and whoosh! Up in flames. Fortunately he was right next to the sink and sprayed the fire out immediately. Neither of us will wear one of those near an open flame again.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    No registered users viewing this page.