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I will never again . . . (Part 3)


Rebecca263
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I poured a whole carton of vanilla flavored soy milk into my beef soup. The recipe called for regular, plain soy milk. I tasted the soup and just couldn't quite figure out where the gross sweetness was coming from. And then...it hit me! OOPS!

Chris cooked breakfast one weekend morning, and made beautiful golden fluffy scrambled eggs. I asked the secret, and he said it was CoffeeMate.

The only CoffeeMate I had in the fridge was French Vanilla. :blink:

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Someone who shall remain nameless (But he posts on eGullet as "Reefpimp") did the classic stock-straining down the drain thing at work just last week. I only lost a quart or so out of a 3-gallon batch; still.....

Several years ago I learned never to try to catch a falling box of Sysco plastic wrap. You don't think of a box as being sharp; still, they all came with slicers that put scalpels to shame. 4 stitches and a happy little scar.

This whole love/hate thing would be a lot easier if it was just hate.

Bring me your finest food, stuffed with your second finest!

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Someone who shall remain nameless (But he posts on eGullet as "Reefpimp") did the classic stock-straining down the drain thing at work just last week.  I only lost a quart or so out of a 3-gallon batch; still.....

Several years ago I learned never to try to catch a falling box of Sysco plastic wrap.  You don't think of a box as being sharp; still, they all came with slicers that put scalpels to shame.  4 stitches and a happy little scar.

Ha I always wondered who the warning on the side of the box was for!!!!!!!

"do not try to catch falling box"

:biggrin::biggrin::biggrin::biggrin:

does this come in pork?

My name's Emma Feigenbaum.

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Several years ago I learned never to try to catch a falling box of Sysco plastic wrap.  You don't think of a box as being sharp; still, they all came with slicers that put scalpels to shame.  4 stitches and a happy little scar.

I have done that too. In fact, I think the story is upthread someplace.

In my case the cutter just raked entirely across the fleshy part of may palm. Nothing left to stitch.

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Thanksgiving 2005.

I hadn't had an accident in the kitchen in years, not knicks or cuts from a knife, no burns, nothing. So we're getting close to putting the Thanksgiving Feast on the table and one of the last tasks is making the gravy. I started to make the roux and got too vigirous and splattered my left hand with hot butter. It took over a month for the blisters (some as big as the size of a penny - which is large on a finger) to go away and the left faint scarring that could be seen for almost a year. Because I know where to look I can still see one in particular but it isn't obvious upon a casaul look. I guess I made up for lost time in the accident department.

Porthos Potwatcher

The Unrelenting Carnivore

Edited by Porthos (log)

Porthos Potwatcher
The Once and Future Cook

;

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After you've turned over/stirred around all your braising short ribs with your tongs? Don't lick the tongs to see how the sauce is coming along.

Ow.

Margo Thompson

Allentown, PA

You're my little potato, you're my little potato,

You're my little potato, they dug you up!

You come from underground!

-Malcolm Dalglish

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Thanksgiving 2005.

I hadn't had an accident in the kitchen in years, not knicks or cuts from a knife, no burns, nothing.  So we're getting close to putting the Thanksgiving Feast on the table and one of the last tasks is making the gravy.  I started to make the roux and got too vigirous and splattered my left hand with hot butter.  It took over a month for the blisters (some as big as the size of a penny - which is large on a finger) to go away and the left faint scarring that could be seen for almost a year.  Because I know where to look I can still see one in particular but it isn't obvious upon a casaul look. I guess I made up for lost time in the accident department.

I, too, have been splashed with the roux and it is indeed napalm-like and quite painful.

For those of you fellow familiar with the University of Akron's mascot ...

"Fear the Roux"

Sorry, couldn't resist. :biggrin:

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I will never again recommend that, because of a lack of bakeware, something be baked in a pan; then promptly forget that fact and grab onto the heavy metal handle of the pan after it's come out of the oven.

One painful evening, a few small blisters.

-- There are infinite variations on food restrictions. --

Crooked Kitchen - my food blog

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Somewhat cooking related-- it happened at a dinner I made. Never, ever bring a just extinguished match back near the matchbook. It will explode. I can just now bend my finger, almost a month later.

I think fish is nice, but then I think that rain is wet, so who am I to judge?

The Guide is definitive. Reality is often inaccurate.

Government Created Killer Nano Robot Infection Epidemic 06.

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I will never again recommend that, because of a lack of bakeware, something be baked in a pan; then promptly forget that fact and grab onto the heavy metal handle of the pan after it's come out of the oven.

One painful evening, a few small blisters.

That's why you hang a towel over a hot pan handle.

SB :cool:

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I will never again recommend that, because of a lack of bakeware, something be baked in a pan; then promptly forget that fact and grab onto the heavy metal handle of the pan after it's come out of the oven.

One painful evening, a few small blisters.

That's why you hang a towel over a hot pan handle.

SB :cool:

Tell that to the person who was using it. I wasn't even cooking that night. There was a pan handle cover on the unused cast iron skillet right behind the pan I grabbed.

-- There are infinite variations on food restrictions. --

Crooked Kitchen - my food blog

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I will never again recommend that, because of a lack of bakeware, something be baked in a pan; then promptly forget that fact and grab onto the heavy metal handle of the pan after it's come out of the oven.

One painful evening, a few small blisters.

That's why you hang a towel over a hot pan handle.

SB :cool:

Tell that to the person who was using it. I wasn't even cooking that night. There was a pan handle cover on the unused cast iron skillet right behind the pan I grabbed.

Maybe it was a sick joke?

SB :sad:

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This post in Bruce's recent blog reminds me that certain things should just have potholder things permanently affixed (palm of left hand once again blistered).

Hmm, you notice the smaller skillet without the potholder thingie? That's because potholder thingies on small skillets catch fire (or at least smolder in a threatening manner) when used on a gas stove. :rolleyes:

Bring back asbestos potholders? :hmmm:

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I will never again heat up Cognac that I intend to flambe a dish with in a tea kettle with a wooden handle. (or any tea kettle for that matter) While my family looked on from the family room on Christmas Eve, I basically gave them an impromptu flame thrower demonstration. Thank God the flame went out before the wooden handle could be burnt off.

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After you've turned over/stirred around all your braising short ribs with your tongs? Don't lick the tongs to see how the sauce is coming along.

Ow.

Also, after stirring sugar for a caramel and remembering NOT to lick the spoon because you know the sugar will indeed be hot, DON'T think you are smart by taking the sugar off with your finger instead.

I'd make a good burglar now, without fingerprints.

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  • 1 month later...

I will never again wonder what happens if you bake an egg (in its shell) in the oven. Because now I know. I did poke an egg in the large end to avoid an explosion, and was partly successful at that. I think the biggst problem was that I forgot it was in the oven (said oven being part of my wood stove which runs a lot this time of year). I came home the next evening, lit the stove, was working away here (I do remember hearing an odd cracking noise at some point...), and started smelling an odd, "toasty" smell. Not nice toasty. I finally opened the oven...and found this:

gallery_38081_3012_4537.jpg

I especially like the little "extrusion" on the upper right. Is it art?

Now I now you are all wondering what the inside looked like. So without further ado:

gallery_38081_3012_61199.jpg

I think I'll call it "Eggs Vesuvius."

"Los Angeles is the only city in the world where there are two separate lines at holy communion. One line is for the regular body of Christ. One line is for the fat-free body of Christ. Our Lady of Malibu Beach serves a great free-range body of Christ over angel-hair pasta."

-Lea de Laria

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Ah HAHAHAHA! This thread is just too funny! :laugh::laugh::laugh:

Well, I will never again stand too close to someone pouring liquid fondue fuel directly into a still-lit burner:

"Mom, I don't think it's a good idea to add fuel when the burner still has a flame!"

"Oh, it's ok, it's just a little bit of fuel."

Needless to say, Mom managed to douse my sleeve with liquid fuel and set my arm on fire.... :wacko:

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I can't believe I read this whole thread - over the better part of a day! Of course, I've pulled the same 'stupids' as everyone else. I will never again:

... Add large quantities of frozen food to a deep-fryer.

... Add year-old cannellini beans that have not softened after 24 hours of soaking to a lentil stew (yes, the recipe called for canned and I wanted cleverly use up pantry staples).

... Try to rescue a Thai-flavored stew with peanut sauce.

... Use ALL the butter in a multi-part recipe for just one part (that was some crumbly shortbread).

... Roast a holiday turkey without pre-placing thick foil 'lifting strips' underneath.

... Use a wooden spoon as a pusher in the blender (mmm, extra fiber!)

... However, I will continue to use dental tape to truss poultry for the rotisserie with abandon.

Frankly, I'm surprised some of the other mishaps haven't happened yet - particularly, exploding Pyrex that I abuse in the microwave and sink (post-cooking) all the time!

David aka "DCP"

Amateur protein denaturer, Maillard reaction experimenter, & gourmand-at-large

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I will never ever again, no matter how tempting, use my fingers to clean off some very hot caramel from a metal probe thermometer that I just pulled out of a hot pot. OK, I admit, this isn't the first time I've done it, but it's definitely the most painful!

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I have a litany of kitchen mistakes; the most painful of which includes cleaning herb butter from the rotary baldes of a hand held blender while talking to my mother, getting distracted, and pressing the 'on' button. It was definitely one of theose laugh or cry moments. I laughed. The herb butter was a decided shade of red though.

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I will never ever again, no matter how tempting, use my fingers to clean off some very hot caramel from a metal probe thermometer that I just pulled out of a hot pot.  OK, I admit, this isn't the first time I've done it, but it's definitely the most painful!

I keep a cup of water around to stick in the probe once I take it out of the pot.

So far, I've not tried to clean it with my fingers yet.

So far.

May

Totally More-ish: The New and Improved Foodblog

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I keep a cup of water around to stick in the probe once I take it out of the pot.

So far, I've not tried to clean it with my fingers yet.

So far.

But the fresh caramel is just so tempting! The burn mark on my thumb, and the blister on my middle finger will remind me that temptation can be a bad thing...

And I have more than 300 papers to mark still...It hurts just holding a pen! (typing isn't much better...oh the pain I will endure for eGullet... :biggrin: )

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