Jump to content
  • Welcome to the eG Forums, a service of the eGullet Society for Culinary Arts & Letters. The Society is a 501(c)3 not-for-profit organization dedicated to the advancement of the culinary arts. These advertising-free forums are provided free of charge through donations from Society members. Anyone may read the forums, but to post you must create a free account.

Keith_W

Food funnies

Recommended Posts

How To Cook A Healthy Baby.

 

In my new rental apartment there is a new induction type microwave -  something I've never used. I have been unable to find an instruction book, but then I can't find anything in this maze of unopened boxes and bags.

I decided to have a look at the control panel, not that it helped much despite being bingual. But I'm delighted that it has a setting for cooking healthy babies to perfection - and you wouldn't want to cook an unhealthy one, would you?

 

20170428_163515.thumb.jpg.f6968606452e3b8042677196468c2997.jpg

 

  • Like 7

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

 It is difficult to push the like button for a microwave that cooks babies!  Do you have any clue from the Chinese characters, what is an appropriate translation?


Edited by Anna N (log)

Anna Nielsen aka "Anna N"

...I just let people know about something I made for supper that they might enjoy, too. That's all it is. (Nigel Slater)

"Cooking is about doing the best with what you have . . . and succeeding." John Thorne

Our 2012 (Kerry Beal and me) Blog

My 2004 eG Blog

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
1 hour ago, Anna N said:

 It is difficult to push the like button for a microwave that cooks babies!  Do you have any clue from the Chinese characters, what is an appropriate translation?

 

 

Nope. The English is an accurate translation of the Chinese. I reckon it must be the work of a Swiftian.

  • Like 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

 

34 minutes ago, liuzhou said:

 

Nope. The English is an accurate translation of the Chinese. I reckon it must be the work of a Swiftian.

 

...but with the exchange rate and shipping costs, who could afford Irish babies?

  • Like 1

“What is called sound economics is very often what mirrors the needs of the respectably affluent.” - John Kenneth Galbraith

 

"Not knowing the scope of your own ignorance is part of the human condition...The first rule of the Dunning-Kruger club is you don’t know you’re a member of the Dunning-Kruger club.” - psychologist David Dunning

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
11 minutes ago, pastrygirl said:

One man's response to kitchen clutter:  

http://www.justincousson.com/passiveaggressive-art-gallery/

 

Love it! Bully for this guy's sense of humor, but nasty disrespectful behavior in MY kitchen will turn me into a(n) passive-aggressive, screaming (rhymes with witch). I have to admit, that makes his take even funnier. xD

  • Like 2

> ^ . . ^ <

 

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
2 hours ago, liuzhou said:

 

That truly explains everything.  Reminds me of language lessons my pub mates used to give me, trying to teach me how to talk proper in York.  We had a fine time of it. xD

  • Like 3

Nancy Smith, aka "Smithy"
HosteG Forumsnsmith@egstaff.org

"Every day should be filled with something delicious, because life is too short not to spoil yourself. " -- Ling (with permission)

"There comes a time in every project when you have to shoot the engineer and start production." -- author unknown

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
4 hours ago, liuzhou said:

 

"This is not a broiler, because broil is not a word."

 

"However, the bread roll can also be referred to as a bun, dinner roll, bap, cob, barm, kaiser roll, bread cake, barm cake, batch, muffin, softie, or buttery, depending on where you are. This is a perfectly reasonable state of affairs." 

 

xD


> ^ . . ^ <

 

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

This is a recipe posted in a sailing forum I monitor:

 

BAKED STUFFED CHICKEN

Ingredients:
6-7 lb. chicken
1 cup melted butter
1 cup stuffing
1 cup uncooked popcorn
salt/pepper to taste

 

Method:
Preheat oven to 350 degrees F.
Brush chicken well with melted butter, salt and pepper.
Fill cavity with stuffing and popcorn. 
Place in baking pan with the neck end toward the back of the oven. 
Listen for popping sounds. 
When the chicken's ass blows the oven door open and the chicken stuffing/popcorn flies across the galley, it is done.

  • Like 8

Cape Town - At the foot of a flat topped mountain with a tablecloth covering it.

Some time ago we had Johnny Cash, Bob Hope and Steve Jobs. Now we have no Cash, no Hope and no Jobs. Please don't let Kevin Bacon die.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I don't know if there's already a topic devoted to this, but I saw a few of these bottles and had to share...

20170529_144840.thumb.jpg.14a9e8542e74d003b4a540cc83ec0995.jpg

20170529_144846.thumb.jpg.6c331a060c9285c2c7e174dec727fdba.jpg

20170529_144858.thumb.jpg.cadc72186ed09bdec34587f4f754ca3c.jpg

  • Like 5

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I gave my brother a collection of goofy hot sauces, and thought I bought them from Penzy's years ago.  I don't think they carry it anymore. Had a huge catalog of them. I do remember getting him the Nuclear Hell hot sauce, the Colon Blaster,  and the Grim Reaper- complete with the black hood and cloak, and a few more. He thought it was hysterical and kept all the bottles.  

  • Like 2

-Andrea

 

A 'balanced diet' means chocolate in BOTH hands. :biggrin:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I've always thought this was a funny name:

"Screaming Sphincter Cayenne Pepper Sauce"

  • Like 2

 

“Peter: Oh my god, Brian, there's a message in my Alphabits. It says, 'Oooooo.'

Brian: Peter, those are Cheerios.”

– From Fox TV’s “Family Guy”

 

Tim Oliver

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Pearls Before Swine, on taking pictures of one's food.

  • Like 3

Gene Weingarten, writing in the Washington Post about online news stories and the accompanying readers' comments: "I basically like 'comments,' though they can seem a little jarring: spit-flecked rants that are appended to a product that at least tries for a measure of objectivity and dignity. It's as though when you order a sirloin steak, it comes with a side of maggots."

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
10 minutes ago, Alex said:

Pearls Before Swine, on taking pictures of one's food.

LOL Yup. The chef I worked with when I was going to culinary school had a saying: "We may eat with the eyes first, but we eat with the mouth *most.*" She was not one for prettifying plates with frills and furbelows, needless to say. 

  • Like 1

“What is called sound economics is very often what mirrors the needs of the respectably affluent.” - John Kenneth Galbraith

 

"Not knowing the scope of your own ignorance is part of the human condition...The first rule of the Dunning-Kruger club is you don’t know you’re a member of the Dunning-Kruger club.” - psychologist David Dunning

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Like 2

Gene Weingarten, writing in the Washington Post about online news stories and the accompanying readers' comments: "I basically like 'comments,' though they can seem a little jarring: spit-flecked rants that are appended to a product that at least tries for a measure of objectivity and dignity. It's as though when you order a sirloin steak, it comes with a side of maggots."

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
1 hour ago, pastrygirl said:

I don't have any strong feelings about Ree Drummond, but if you enjoy snark, this guy has plenty ...

 

https://www.thelostogle.com/2017/07/20/5-of-the-pioneer-womans-worst-laziest-and-most-questionable-recipes/

 

 

Indeed it's snarky.

I've read other negative reviews about Ms. Drummond and they all seem to be big on the jealousy factor.

How dare she be wealthy and successful and raise very nice children with a hot husband!

  • Like 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I've always thought of Ree Drummond as being very similar to Paula Deen. I don't really care if either of them are wealthy and successful and raise very nice children with a hot husband. I think their recipes are bad. I'm allowed to think that, no? 

  • Like 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
2 minutes ago, cakewalk said:

I've always thought of Ree Drummond as being very similar to Paula Deen. I don't really care if either of them are wealthy and successful and raise very nice children with a hot husband. I think their recipes are bad. I'm allowed to think that, no? 

Of course.

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    No registered users viewing this page.

×
×
  • Create New...