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lancastermike

Worst cooking show ever

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You've got to come up with the name of this - I've racked my brain and don't recall seeing any such show.  Searching online has gotten me nowhere!

 

"Conviction Kitchen", with Mark Thuet and his wife.  It was a trainwreck.

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In Sweden we have Mat -Tina, who steal from every chef she can find, even their monologues translated to Swedish.  And she repeats the word  smaka smaka smaka   ( taste, taste, taste) until you just want to  add her to one of her dishes.   Her first cookbook has  smaka smaka smaka  every second page, the food pictures are out of focus or  taken in such weird way the food looks horrible.


Cheese is you friend, Cheese will take care of you, Cheese will never betray you, But blue mold will kill me.

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"Conviction Kitchen", with Mark Thuet and his wife.  It was a trainwreck.

Thanks suet.  Now that I've looked up their pictures I realize I've seen their faces before - and I know I've seen his cookbook in my favourite cheap clearance bookstore.  Must have come out after I stopped watching much in the way of Food Network because there was rarely anything worth seeing.

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Mark Thuet, yes.  My gosh that show was so awful. 

 

And it was on Canadian Television, the same network (there is more than one, isn't there?)  that made the excellent "How It's Made" series that shows productions lines of everything from snacks to lawn tractors to industrial tooling.

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I do have a winner in bad show hosts.   Ernst, does multi shows,  like fake building a house and then cooking, well once he made Schnapps out of a poisonous plant and said it was a  whole different plant, well the plants do not even look the same.  The poisonous one  has a strong smell and pointy leafs  and the safe one has round  dusky green leafs and doesn't smell.


Cheese is you friend, Cheese will take care of you, Cheese will never betray you, But blue mold will kill me.

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Wait!  It's Marc, with a "c", Thuet.

 

There is a Mark Thuet, as well.  A son, maybe?

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Sadly, fate has brought us to the point where the number of "worst" cooking shows far exceeds the quality cooking shows. In terms of the worst shows of the day, my votes go to The Next Food Network Star and Master Chef, aka from the house of Gordon.  Both shows are terribly detached from true cooking and cuisine and as interesting as Premium Saltine Crackers, but I suppose if you are looking to shill soup in Food Network Magazine, you need a young, sprite, cutesy sort of personality.  But there is hope my friends in the form of the true "Master Chef"--as in the UK version.  You can view a number of episodes on You Tube, including this production with incredibly vivid, delicious images of food.  And whoever said British cooking is bland isn't aware of the creativity going on in the UK today.   https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WMXbIo0GFMo

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The UK version is fantastic.  No nonsense, tough judges, realistic praise and technique!  Something we don't get on the American version.

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Sadly, fate has brought us to the point where the number of "worst" cooking shows seemingly far exceeds the quality cooking shows. In terms of the worst shows of the day, my votes go to The Next Food Network Star and Master Chef, aka from the house of Gordon.  Both shows are terribly detached from true cooking and cuisine and as interesting as Premium Saltine Crackers, but I suppose if you are looking to shill soup in Food Network Magazine, you need a young, sprite, cutesy sort of personality.  But there is hope my friends in the form of the true "Master Chef"--as in the UK version.  You can view a number of episodes on You Tube, including this production with incredibly vivid, delicious images of food.  And whoever said British cooking is bland isn't aware of the creativity going on in the UK today.   https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WMXbIo0GFMo

 

David? Do you think the lack of good shows correlates to the COMMERCIALIZATION  and marketing?

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Wawa Sizzli FTW!

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I love Master chef UK  but here in Sweden they yet again  do the american version for the Swedish market and it just clash with the Swedish mindset. I hate it, the judges are rude, annoying and un Swedishly in your face.


Cheese is you friend, Cheese will take care of you, Cheese will never betray you, But blue mold will kill me.

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Masterchef UK and Masterchef: The Professionals are both stellar shows.  Love the emphasis on cooking, love the seriousness of the amateurs, and love the challenges (mystery box, skills test, invention test, etc.).  Masterchef USA is nothing like the original format.  In general, the US-based shows all have too much emphasis on the competitive aspect of the show (earning ways to screw everyone else, lots of contestant conflict) whereas the original UK shows focus on the food.  The contestants rarely have a bad word for each other, and there's none of the "twists" which so often cause conflict and backstabbing.

 

Basically, the UK food shows almost universally beat the US versions.  And I say this as a Canadian. :raz:

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I love the British shows, but they do have their weird people too.  Oh you have to see Posh Nosh, it is  parody of cooking shows and it makes me laugh!

 

Am I the only one who  doesnt like Martha Stewart ?  Every time she say cheap or affordable is   expensive. 


Cheese is you friend, Cheese will take care of you, Cheese will never betray you, But blue mold will kill me.

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I love the British shows, but they do have their weird people too.  Oh you have to see Posh Nosh, it is  parody of cooking shows and it makes me laugh!

 

Am I the only one who  doesnt like Martha Stewart ?  Every time she say cheap or affordable is   expensive. 

Martha gives me the willies. She's got a baking show on now in our area, but she can't measure worth squat, yet she talks about how important it is to measure properly. If she really felt that way, she would tell us all to buy a scale, and show us how to use it.


MelissaH

Oswego, NY

Chemist, writer, hired gun

Say this five times fast: "A big blue bucket of blue blueberries."

foodblog1 | kitchen reno | foodblog2

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Martha is a businesswoman, not a chef.  I bought one of her cookbooks about 20 years ago and ended up giving it away.

 

I also love the Brit shows.  There was one, "Come Dine With Me" that was hilarious.  It pitched together four random strangers they took turns cooking in their homes for the others.  There was one with an Indian woman who brought her own chilli sauce with her and doused all her meals with it before she tasted the food.  One had a vicar who cooked a meal at the rectory.  Another a woman of some means who lived in a castle.  Others lived in row houses, on farms, &c.  I liked it not so much for the cooking---although that was interesting---but for the character studies.  The voiceover was overly dramatic and you knew the whole show was a gag. 

 

Sometimes literally. 

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annabelle:  Well British shows tend to have  what you would call overly dramatic voiceover, it their way of being funny.  You should see some of their building shows, can be a real hoot.  I love come dine with me.

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Cheese is you friend, Cheese will take care of you, Cheese will never betray you, But blue mold will kill me.

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Martha is a businesswoman, not a chef.  I bought one of her cookbooks about 20 years ago and ended up giving it away.

 

I also love the Brit shows.  There was one, "Come Dine With Me" that was hilarious.  It pitched together four random strangers they took turns cooking in their homes for the others.  There was one with an Indian woman who brought her own chilli sauce with her and doused all her meals with it before she tasted the food.  One had a vicar who cooked a meal at the rectory.  Another a woman of some means who lived in a castle.  Others lived in row houses, on farms, &c.  I liked it not so much for the cooking---although that was interesting---but for the character studies.  The voiceover was overly dramatic and you knew the whole show was a gag. 

 

Sometimes literally. 

 

I loved that, too.  The series I saw was filmed in Canada, I think.  Some of the evenings did seem pretty ghastly.  As I recall, several of the hosts thought that it would give them a big edge if they provided some sort of special entertainment presented by themselves - like a bad cello (was it?) performance by the host that lasted half the night.  It was particularly enjoyable when a smug, conceited host lost.  And, although I get that not everybody is as familiar with Mexican/Spanish names as folks such as I that live in the US Southwest, I found it particularly grating to have one hostess go on and on about her special "OX-ican" meal, complete with OX-ican cheese, recipes, etc.  The mispronunciation all by itself would not have been so grating, but she had a rather superior and condescending tone in her voice as she explained all about it to her "ignorant" guests.  I couldn't help but think that if I were trying something new, and I had planned a little lecture on the subject, I think I'd make an effort to learn how to correctly say the name. 


Edited by Jaymes (log)
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I don't understand why rappers have to hunch over while they stomp around the stage hollering.  It hurts my back to watch them. On the other hand, I've been thinking that perhaps I should start a rap group here at the Old Folks' Home.  Most of us already walk like that.

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Did anyone see that cooking show hosted by the biker chick?  I thought that one was pretty awful.

 

But the one I hate most is Hell's Kitchen.  Hell, indeed.  I can't stand the language, the vulgarity, the brutality, the screaming, the hollering, the pillorying, the humiliation of one another.  Hell indeed.  So why would I intentionally want to put myself in Hell?  Turns out, I don't.

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I don't understand why rappers have to hunch over while they stomp around the stage hollering.  It hurts my back to watch them. On the other hand, I've been thinking that perhaps I should start a rap group here at the Old Folks' Home.  Most of us already walk like that.

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Hell's Kitchen is awful.  I watched one season of it and tried to watch another and thought "Why am I watching this crap?"  You can't even root for the contestants since they are so detestable.  Smoking, boozing, cursing, physically fighting.  Who needs that?

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"Come Dine with Me" is great!  I didn't like the Canadian version at first, but warmed to it after a while....once the commentator stopped trying to be *exactly* like the British guy (who is hilarious) it got a lot better.  My favorite was Cathy, who was so bad she made it to the "Redemption" special with 4 other horrible cooks.  Girl got drunk prepping her food, and would up pulling her container of heavy cream out of the trash before whipping it up to serve with dessert. :blink: Also was entertained by that blonde magician with the big mohawk (Dylan?) who had his worm composter in the kitchen.....

 

I grew up watching Natalie Dupree and Joanna Lund in amongst all the greater PBS food programs, so have a special place in my heart for the trainwrecks.

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Ha!  I always loved how Natalie Dupree got flour everywhere when ever she baked anything.

 

She reminds me of me.

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There ought to be a sub category of this thread titled "the Worse Kitchen Equipment and Books Commercials".  I'd like to nominate the commercial for Dump Cakes Dump Dinners and the Green pan" all available for $10.00. For one dump dinner therecipe calls for putting some ground beef (unbrowned) into the pan, throwing in some pasta, pouring  a bottle of tomato sauce over it , sprinkling on some cheese, and baking it for a dinner your family will love.  These dump(ster) recipes make Sandra Lee look good.  I think  the purchasers of these books should be  working wives who come home  and have to cook dinner for a husband who's already half-way through his first six-pack and sullen teenagers who don't lift a finger to help. After all, who could blame them for buying these books and subjecting their family to the recipes in them?

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"A fool", he said, "would have swallowed it". Samuel Johnson

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"Come Dine with Me" is great!  I didn't like the Canadian version at first, but warmed to it after a while....once the commentator stopped trying to be *exactly* like the British guy (who is hilarious) it got a lot better.  My favorite was Cathy, who was so bad she made it to the "Redemption" special with 4 other horrible cooks.  Girl got drunk prepping her food, and would up pulling her container of heavy cream out of the trash before whipping it up to serve with dessert. :blink: Also was entertained by that blonde magician with the big mohawk (Dylan?) who had his worm composter in the kitchen.....

 

And who was the woman that invited a bunch of lively dancing party guests to jazz up the evening? 

 

Seemed a little odd, but hey....

 

Everybody on that show seemed a little odd.


I don't understand why rappers have to hunch over while they stomp around the stage hollering.  It hurts my back to watch them. On the other hand, I've been thinking that perhaps I should start a rap group here at the Old Folks' Home.  Most of us already walk like that.

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I just watched through a Swedish show... gha...  the person uses  a " dialect"   that consist of  English words to sound "cool" and made up words, yeah this the Swedish spoken in our Capitol. *facepalm*

Even better it is subtitled in correct Swedish.   Anyway wouldnt be so bad  if he wasnt trying to get people to eat a very poisonous plant, he uses the directly translated  word for spring onions , vårlök, how ever this in Sweden is a  plant  that gives liver damage  and  spring onion is   salladslök  (salad onion). It been 20 years of the miss translation and people ending up in hospital due to eating the wrong plant.


Cheese is you friend, Cheese will take care of you, Cheese will never betray you, But blue mold will kill me.

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Oh and why doesnt Christina Pierello (sp?) "Christina Cooks" have all her spices premeasured out instead of little bowls of things, like cinnamon that she tap, tap, taps into the big bowl?

Why does she use those awkward wooden spoons?  Why cant she just dump the bowl of walnuts into the big bowl instead of spooning them in?

And why must we listen to that guitar playing lounge singer?

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Wawa Sizzli FTW!

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