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Worst Candy Ever


weinoo

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Two pages and nobody has mentioned the "Whizzo Quality Assortment?"

mmmm... Crunchy Frog. Heap good.

EDIT - LINK REMOVED. Didn't know it would embed. Google "Whizzo Quality Assortment" if you're interested.

Edited by ScoopKW (log)

Who cares how time advances? I am drinking ale today. -- Edgar Allan Poe

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A lot of the stuff reviewed probably falls under "acquired taste," not "bad candy."

And, seriously, nine out of ten reviews could be boiled down to "THEM FURRINERS EAT THE STRANGEST THINGS LOL!!1!"

This is my skillet. There are many like it, but this one is mine. My skillet is my best friend. It is my life. I must master it, as I must master my life. Without me my skillet is useless. Without my skillet, I am useless. I must season my skillet well. I will. Before God I swear this creed. My skillet and myself are the makers of my meal. We are the masters of our kitchen. So be it, until there are no ingredients, but dinner. Amen.

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However, THE worst candy I ever had was something Twizzlers put out (briefly) some years back, and which were those rubbery twists, but instead of being fake liquorice or cherry/strawberry flavours, were pastel coloured 'fruit' flavours, and filled with some odd, bizarrely plasticky-tasting gluey substance. They made me miserable.

Those were truly disgusting! I am not usually a licorice fan but I bought some of those on a whim and gah!

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I recently bought a packet of citrus- and licorice-flavoured wine gums, which seemed like a fine idea, but they were so sweet and plasticky tasting that I actually binned them... I soldiered through about a third of the bag, trying to appreciate them, but it was a no go.

I nominate Sen Sen. It is akin to eating licorice flavored asphalt and the taste remains in your mouth for a very long time.

Wait: you make that sound like a bad thing.

Fishermans Friend. Throat lozenges, but absolutely awful.

I actually like those! I had a terrible cold recently, and went through a packet of them like they were Smarties. They took the taste of the above-mentioned wine gums out of my mouth, too.

However, THE worst candy I ever had was something Twizzlers put out (briefly) some years back, and which were those rubbery twists, but instead of being fake liquorice or cherry/strawberry flavours, were pastel coloured 'fruit' flavours, and filled with some odd, bizarrely plasticky-tasting gluey substance. They made me miserable.

Those were truly disgusting! I am not usually a licorice fan but I bought some of those on a whim and gah!

Oh, the ones I meant weren't licorice, they were fake fruit flavours! They came out with a licorice version too?

Michaela, aka "Mjx"
Manager, eG Forums
mscioscia@egstaff.org

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Chalky, dry, and oddly flavored conversation hearts for Valentines.

That yucky "hard candy" that comes in a tin and is usually around at christmas. Generally at some point all the candies stick together in one big mass.

OH totally. I can't believe I didn't list those, also.

My brain must have blocked all memory of that.

Edited by Shelby (log)
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  • 3 months later...

I have an anti sweet tooth and only eat sweets twice a year. Birthday cake for my kids. I remember as a kid I begged my Dad to buy me a Cherry Mash.

Maybe that's why I don't eat sweets any more.

That's the thing about opposum inerds, they's just as tasty the next day.

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Cheap fruit slices, like the kind you can get from the Vermont Country Store catalogue.

Especially in mint.

I hate mint anything.

There is a place in my heart for circus peanuts, peeps, and candy corn. The only edible candy corn comes from Jelly Belly, after they bought Goelitz. The white peeps (ghosts, easter eggs) are better tasting than the yellow ones, but the yellow ones are the ones I coveted as a child. My mother thought they were too low class. As for circus peanuts, a dear friend of an advanced age loves them and I love them because of that.

I like to bake nice things. And then I eat them. Then I can bake some more.

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Don't knock the fruit slices, though I agree about the mint.

My cousins used to eat this pink popcorn that was molded into bricks. I mean, it was pepto bismol pink. I was always afraid to try it but it looked scary and smelled bad.

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My nominations:

Peeps (really could there ever be a more blah & uninspiring waste of resources?)

Cadbury Filled Eggs (because I always fantasize what they should be like and never are)

Candy Corn (reminds me of the abomination that is sweet corn and then worse.. it is just striped wax with a hint of sugar)

Swedish Fish (maybe they aren't even that bad.. maybe their texture is so bad because the average turns on package of Swedish Fish are once every twelve years)

Twizzlers (a candy so bad it must have some kind of nefarious cult association... i.e., instead of secret handshakes the modern day Cabal splinter group of the Masons that controls the world identifies each other by their consumption of Twizzlers.. a practice that cannot be explained in gastronomic terms.. but in light of hypnosis)

Whoppers (the candy that proudly chooses to evoke the aroma of baby milk vomit)

Boston Baked Beans (mostly because they remind me that some people have the vile tradition of glopping molasses and/or sugar on to the noble Phaseolus)

Edited by EatNopales (log)
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I'm not a huge fan of marshmallows, which seems to be blasphemy in some circles.

Peeps in general are pretty nasty, but they transform when you brûlée them :biggrin:

My husband can't stand anything flavored with artificial banana.

I think milk chocolate flavored "chocolate" you can find around Easter particularly awful.

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Wow there are so many:

Salt water taffy

Ribbon candy--eating actual ribbon might be more satisfying

Salt water taffy

those safety lollipops with the looped string handle--completely flavorless

that powdered stuff that comes in a straw

Salt water taffy

Wax bottles and wax lips made me vomit when I was a child

Candy cigarettes

Salt water taffy

and worst of all:

Salt water taffy. Pure evil.

Edited by pennbrew (log)
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The things that would make me cringe when I found them in my Halloween bag: Bit-O-Honey, Mary Janes and Zagnut. Awful stuff. Necco wafers. I never understood the wax lip things. I once worked in a hospital and a patient shared his "diabetic" candy with me and I thought it was just okay. A few hours later I learned one of the unfortunate side effects of sorbitol :huh:

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  • 2 months later...

Y'all are weird. All that stuff is good, even when bad, except for really cheap chocolates that taste like stale floor sweepings.

The really bad candy is Dutch salted licorice. I shudder just thinking about it.

Guess it take all kinds... I can eat any licorice (meaning the real stuff, not the red things... licorice is a flavour, not a texture!) by the sackful, salted or otherwise (I was delighted to discover that there's a semi-continent-ful of salted licorice to explore, since it's big throughout northern Europe).

Now, milk chocolate with licorice embedded in it in a variety of ways is a new low I recently encountered: I keep giving it a go, but I just don't take to it. The aftertaste is just indescribable. It could only be worse if peanut butter were involved, too (so I'm guessing I'll be seeing that soon).

Michaela, aka "Mjx"
Manager, eG Forums
mscioscia@egstaff.org

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Seems to be a theme of sickly sweet stuff with no redeeming qualities. I agree. Peeps, necco wafers, candy corn, Cadbury eggs, licorice of any kind, etc., etc. All variations on the same, sickly sweet theme. Yuck. But then I'm with whoever else said chocolate must be dark and a minimum of 60%. I also agree with that person that orange and dark chocolate is a wonderful combination when done well.

Someone else, Pierogi, I think, mentioned the Trader Joe's chocolate covered sunflower seeds. Sounds like a good idea, doesn't it? Chocolate and nuts/seeds can't be bad, right? I love Trader Joe's. And Trader Joe's chocolates are usually pretty decent for mass produced chocolate. I love their bars and dark chocolate covered pomegranate seeds. But the sunflower seeds are just rank. Tried them once, thought the first one might have been rancid, tried a couple more,hoping they would be better and would get that disgusting taste out of my mouth, threw them in the trash. The worst chocolate candy I have ever had. Ever.

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Necco Wafers, candy corn and licorice (except salted) are some of the best candies, ever. The yummiest Neccos are the black ones.

These are not "serious" candies, of course. That designation belongs to high end chocolates. There are times when you want a truly delicious high quality candy. But there are plenty of times when you want to chomp on some orange slices or candy corn. :)

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