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Culinary Signs of the Apocalypse: 2010


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Scented food billboards.

America's first scented billboard, depicting a towering fork piercing a giant piece of meat, has been erected on the River Highway in Mooresville, North Carolina, pumping out the smell of grilled steak to promote the Bloom grocery chain's new line of beef.

A high-powered fan attached to the base of the billboard pole disperses the aroma of black pepper and charcoal by blowing air over cartridges loaded with fragrance oil.

Another US company, ice-cream chain Emack & Bolio's, has also boosted sales by setting up an "aroma billboard" sending out the scent of waffle cones to attract customers to its store in the Hard Rock Hotel in Orlando, Florida.

Tx to Josh Friedland of The Food Section.

Chris Amirault

eG Ethics Signatory

Sir Luscious got gator belts and patty melts

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I have to wonder if the EPA will get involved. There's a chocolate factory in Chicago that got in trouble for perfuming the air...though I guess that was technically an issue with the opacity of the smelly substance, not the smell per se.

Edited by KD1191 (log)

True rye and true bourbon wake delight like any great wine...dignify man as possessing a palate that responds to them and ennoble his soul as shimmering with the response.

DeVoto, The Hour

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In USA Today, "Alcohol companies' pink campaigns anger breast cancer survivors." My favorite part, in a "What Drinks Are Women Served in Hell?" sort of way:

Chambord, which markets pink vodka and liqueurs, urges people to "pink their drink," saying that "by adding a splash of Chambord to any cocktail, you're supporting breast cancer awareness year-round."

Chris Amirault

eG Ethics Signatory

Sir Luscious got gator belts and patty melts

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Mozzarella cheese...SUBSTITUTE! Sure, you have to keep production costs low to sell a Totino's Pizza for $1.05, but seriously, mozzarella cheese substitute?!? I think it's made from potato starch, salt, oil and a hint of real cheese. (Full disclosure, Totino's was a childhood favorite of mine/occasional lapse of judgment I would enjoy until I, rather foolishly, read the ingredients.)

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Mozzarella cheese...SUBSTITUTE! Sure, you have to keep production costs low to sell a Totino's Pizza for $1.05, but seriously, mozzarella cheese substitute?!? I think it's made from potato starch, salt, oil and a hint of real cheese. (Full disclosure, Totino's was a childhood favorite of mine/occasional lapse of judgment I would enjoy until I, rather foolishly, read the ingredients.)

Didn't totino's used to have the "real seal"? What ever happened to that?

I'll still eat one on occasion, but I would never read the ingredients.

That's the thing about opposum inerds, they's just as tasty the next day.

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Bacon Cheddar Bagels.

"Los Angeles is the only city in the world where there are two separate lines at holy communion. One line is for the regular body of Christ. One line is for the fat-free body of Christ. Our Lady of Malibu Beach serves a great free-range body of Christ over angel-hair pasta."

-Lea de Laria

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Bacon Cheddar Bagels.

Hmmmm... At least those ingredients are savory. They avoid the outrage (obvious to longtime bagel enthusiasts if not to everyone) of putting sweet things in bagel dough; but they substitute another one (even more obvious to longtime bagel enthusiasts).

O tempora ...

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I found this in the grocery store the other day: Peanut butter slices. You can unwrap them like american processed cheese slices and put them on bread. Bacon flavored spam would be a close second...

"I eat fat back, because bacon is too lean"

-overheard from a 105 year old man

"The only time to eat diet food is while waiting for the steak to cook" - Julia Child

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Whole chicken, cooked and canned. AND I saw on a tv show some kid eating 6 of them...

"I eat fat back, because bacon is too lean"

-overheard from a 105 year old man

"The only time to eat diet food is while waiting for the steak to cook" - Julia Child

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Whole chicken, cooked and canned. AND I saw on a tv show some kid eating 6 of them...

When I worked in bush camps where all the food had to be flown in by float plane, canned chicken served an important purpose as emergency food in case the plane was delayed. You wanted to have something that no one would eat up unless they really had to!

It's almost never bad to feed someone.

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This couple got one in 1956, so canned whole chickens have been around at least since then.

It's a cute article, anyway.

This is my skillet. There are many like it, but this one is mine. My skillet is my best friend. It is my life. I must master it, as I must master my life. Without me my skillet is useless. Without my skillet, I am useless. I must season my skillet well. I will. Before God I swear this creed. My skillet and myself are the makers of my meal. We are the masters of our kitchen. So be it, until there are no ingredients, but dinner. Amen.

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Whole chicken, cooked and canned. AND I saw on a tv show some kid eating 6 of them...

My mother was raised by her older sister in rural Kansas. Her sister did the cooking, cleaning, etc, for the entire family. She canned chickens because nothing went to waste back in those days. Fresh chicken got you through the spring and summer while pork was king during the autumn and winter. She canned any extra chickens which were used in stews and soups when you couldn't get to the market (or afford to get to the market).

 

“Peter: Oh my god, Brian, there's a message in my Alphabits. It says, 'Oooooo.'

Brian: Peter, those are Cheerios.”

– From Fox TV’s “Family Guy”

 

Tim Oliver

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Chicken from a can sounds interesting. How does it compare to other forms of chicken? Surely it's moist and flavourful as well as handy. Canning sometimes affects seafood in wonderful ways -- why not bird protein?

ETA: I've enjoyed homegrown chicken in a jar from a family farm, it was exquisite, it's the grocery store tin that's an unknown.

Edited by Peter the eater (log)

Peter Gamble aka "Peter the eater"

I just made a cornish game hen with chestnut stuffing. . .

Would you believe a pigeon stuffed with spam? . . .

Would you believe a rat filled with cough drops?

Moe Sizlack

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Canned squid pieces? I actually have some in the pantry, along with octopus, in a variety of mediums (hot sauce, garlic, olive oil, etc). Good on crackers. Or are you talking about a whole squid?

This is my skillet. There are many like it, but this one is mine. My skillet is my best friend. It is my life. I must master it, as I must master my life. Without me my skillet is useless. Without my skillet, I am useless. I must season my skillet well. I will. Before God I swear this creed. My skillet and myself are the makers of my meal. We are the masters of our kitchen. So be it, until there are no ingredients, but dinner. Amen.

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Canned squid pieces? I actually have some in the pantry, along with octopus, in a variety of mediums (hot sauce, garlic, olive oil, etc). Good on crackers. Or are you talking about a whole squid?

I think it was whole squid...the can sort of implied that at any rate. By the way, I'm not necessarily bringing it up as a candidate for this thread. Having never tried it I cannot comment, and I am a veggie anyway who has never eaten squid so I would hardly be a good judge. The canned chicken thing just made me think of it.

ETA: It may have been this. I know the can was red, but I just did a google and a lot of them are, so I am not totally sure, but this particular one does look similar at any rate.

Edited by Jenni (log)
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I got you, just something a little odd you were reminded of. My comment was more along the lines of your-oddity-is-my-staple, (and presumably the other way around) which is a fun conversation but probably off-topic.

Other uses for canned squid, octopus, etc: in pasta sauce, over white rice.

I grew up in the middle of a desert, several hundred kilometers and a mountain range between us and either coast. Canned (and to a lesser degree, frozen or dried) seafood was more or less a local staple, while fresh was (is?) a luxury good.

This is my skillet. There are many like it, but this one is mine. My skillet is my best friend. It is my life. I must master it, as I must master my life. Without me my skillet is useless. Without my skillet, I am useless. I must season my skillet well. I will. Before God I swear this creed. My skillet and myself are the makers of my meal. We are the masters of our kitchen. So be it, until there are no ingredients, but dinner. Amen.

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Vodka drinks stuff recalls a quip of a generation ago: The Phillips Screwdriver. (Vodka and Milk of Magnesia.)

Considering the physical state of the Baby Boomers, I suggest the Piledriver -- vodka and prune juice.

Who cares how time advances? I am drinking ale today. -- Edgar Allan Poe

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When I put all that effort into ensure I take the stones and other bits of debris out of pulses before I cook them, why would I want to put stones into my whisky?

And anyway, I actually prefer the slight dilution that an icecube or two provides. Or is that because I'm drinking cheap stuff?

Can't be long know before the four horsemen come riding into view, whinging about the unwanted rock flavour in their apocalyptic cocktails...

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Sexpresso.

Baristas Coffee Co. says it “employs and promotes attractive female baristas trained to interact with the customers to maximize sales as well as prepare the finest beverages available.” The company said the employees “wear constantly changing and appealing costumes, allowing for customers to enjoy the anticipation of a fun, creative, new, and intriguing experience every day.”

But there also is a tawdry side to the sexpresso business, as some operators or their employees have been known to take the concept too far.

In September 2009, local law enforcement officials in Everett, Wash., arrested five female baristas from Grab-N-Go Espresso and charged them with prostitution and violations of the city’s adult entertainment ordinance. Shortly thereafter, Cowgirls Espresso chief executive Jesse Molnick issued a press release condemning such illicit behavior.

Chris Amirault

eG Ethics Signatory

Sir Luscious got gator belts and patty melts

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I'm not sure this actually qualifies for this thread, since it's not an actual, edible product, but to me it is a sure sign of ANY Apocalpyse....

Has anyone seen the abomination on Cooking Channel called "Bitchin' Kitchen"?

And if you have, can anyone tell me, why, in the name of anything that relates to decent food and its preparation and enjoyment, why this dimwit bimbo has an outlet on a semi-legitimate broadcast outlet?

I can't stand to even watch the promos, and have to hit the "mute" button when they come on. I've become more accepting of Cooking Channel as they've been on for a while, but this train wreck could sink the whole deal for me.

--Roberta--

"Let's slip out of these wet clothes, and into a dry Martini" - Robert Benchley

Pierogi's eG Foodblog

My *outside* blog, "A Pound Of Yeast"

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