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Naming Cocktails


Troy Sidle

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That's odd. I was just about to post my update to that cocktail... (You'll note my naming strategy in calling it "Craft." That lets drinkers know that what they're experiencing is an expertly balanced and tasteful concoction hand-crafted by an artisanal mixologist. Just a naming pro-tip ;-)...)

by Dale DeGroff, Clyde Common, Williamsburg, MA.
3/4 oz Limoncello
3/4 oz Strawberry eau de vie (squirrel-infused)
3/4 oz Eau de Vie of Douglas Fir
3/4 oz Raspberry Shrub
3/4 oz Maraschino Liqueur
3/8 oz Cranberry (Pickled)
4 pn Tartaric acid powder
1 ds Demerara syrup (3:1)
1 rinse Grenadine
16 spl Fernet Branca
Plant, grow, ferment, and distill eaux de vie from lemons, strawberries, and Douglas Fir on-site in the greenhouse on the terrace of your Brooklyn loft. (Must be on-site. Must be Brooklyn.) Sweeten the lemon eau de vie with fresh cane syrup. Infuse the strawberry eau de vie with squirrel (fresh only!). Combine. Hand craft a barrel out of staves rescued from your father's first yacht and age spirits in barrel for six weeks or until you've grown bored and moved on to your next artisanal project, whichever comes first. Empty barrel, and heart. Combine contents of barrel (but not heart) with handmade raspberry shrub (with raspberries plucked from your significant other's father's estate) and authentic Maraschino liqueur. In a mortar and pestle, mash with pickled cranberries overnight. Strain. Ferment in the gullet of a hoatzin, the Guyanese stink-bird (for that touch of Demerara smoke!). Kill and gut bird; double strain. In Erlenmeyer flask, add tartaric acid (fresh squeezed only!) and Demerara syrup, then smash the flask over a rotary evaporator and evaporate its contents rotarily. Convert the remaining liquid into a spray and serve out of an atomizer inserted into the mouth of a grenadine-rinsed and hand-taxidermied squirrel (eastern gray only!). Splash Fernet Branca (or other difficult amaro) until fragrant. Serve up.

I assume you garnish with a squirrel tail, rinsed with home-distilled absinthe employing fresh herbs, table scraps, and stuff found under the bed the day after the last Beltaine, and aged in the armpit of the bar-back for a weekend?

"The thirst for water is a primitive one. Thirst for wine means culture, and thirst for a cocktail is its highest expression."

Pepe Carvalho, The Buenos Aires Quintet by Manuel Vazquez Montalban

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Those who play with firewater sometimes get burned?

Seriously, we should probably all be apologizing to the OP for hijacking his thread!

"The thirst for water is a primitive one. Thirst for wine means culture, and thirst for a cocktail is its highest expression."

Pepe Carvalho, The Buenos Aires Quintet by Manuel Vazquez Montalban

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OP, I am sorry for lighting your thread on fire, with flamed squirrel tail garnishes.

I am also sorry for writing "ginophiles" upthread, when I clearly meant ginophobes. There. It feels good to get that off my chest.

DrunkLab.tumblr.com

”In Demerara some of the rum producers have a unique custom of placing chunks of raw meat in the casks to assist in aging, to absorb certain impurities, and to add a certain distinctive character.” -Peter Valaer, "Foreign and Domestic Rum," 1937

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  • 2 months later...

Martin Doudoroff linked this really nice article about cocktail naming on twitter today. It discusses naming conventions based on references, the difficulties of finding a pertinent and original name for a new cocktail, etc.

http://www.themorningnews.org/article/swizzle-me-this

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  • 5 years later...

Re the Squirrel Sex Manhattan. Squirrels can't remember where they bury one ingredient, let alone 20, so this drink is wildly improbable. In fact the drink sounds as disgusting as having sex with a squirrel. When I came to the last ingredient and realized that in addition to a squirrel the sex was really a threesome, including a ferret I really felt ill. Oh wait, my mistake.

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The naming of drinks is a difficult matter, 

It isn't just one of your barhopping games; 

You may think at first I'm as mad as a hatter 

When I tell you a drink must have TWO DIFFERENT NAMES. 

First of all, there's the name that the drinkers use daily, 

Such as Julep, Manhattan, or Punch or Great Dane,

Such as Vesper, Old Fashioned, or Coffee with Bailey's 

Each one a sensible everyday name.

 

To be continued, maybe...

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