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I'm a fraud


Fat Guy

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I've used a paper plate as a cutting board!!

I use cake mix too when I bake for the seniors.  I prefer to call it a premeasured ingredient. 

I also use canned beans when I make baked beans( Bush's), dressed up of course.

hiroyuki uses flattened out milk crates for "cutting boards" :biggrin:

omg I do everything incorrectly when it comes to cooking ):

BEARS, BEETS, BATTLESTAR GALACTICA
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OK, see........

Most of these (well, maybe with the exception of passing off the Stouffer's lasagna as your own......) are not fraudulent so much as they are expeditious.

Honestly. When you're working 40-plus hours a week, and commuting on top of that, and you have other obligations (kids, pets, friends, community, you name it) sometimes, just sometimes you've gotta go for the quick and easy, even if it isn't quite *authentic*.

Add in the fact that not everyone is equally skilled in all things (a pastry chef I will never be, my pie crusts/puff pastry/choux and even some cakes are pretty darn sad) and it just makes sense to use quality (key word that !) substitutes to "from scratch".

If its a choice between using Better than Bouillion or not making a dish because I have no chicken stock, and as a result settling for Mickey D's, well, Better than Bouillion is a no brainer.

Not fraudulent.......expeditious. That's my story, and I'm stickin' to it.

--Roberta--

"Let's slip out of these wet clothes, and into a dry Martini" - Robert Benchley

Pierogi's eG Foodblog

My *outside* blog, "A Pound Of Yeast"

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Now this is a fraud. Last Sunday, at the culinary class, the recipe called for chili powder. However, I wasn't able to buy it so I used ground Spanish paprika but never admitted it to the chef. Well, they look the same to me. :biggrin:

Angel
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Cheats in my store cupboard:

Tinned tomatoes (San Marzano)

Heinz tomato soup (for the cook)

Heinz Tomato ketchup

Tinned beans (Baked but also butterbean and haricot. Much easier than starting from dried)

Kosher Parve vegetarian chicken soup powder, Surprisingly good. (for emergencies and for those with beliefs)

Canned corn

Filo and puff pastry

Canned croissant dough (great for minis for appetisers)

Vitamin C powder (for bread dough)

Dried skimmed milk powder (soft breads and also sausages)

Not being a baker I don't understand the relevance of the Vitamin C powder, but what would be the alternative? make your own :blink:

And life is definitely too short to make your own puff pastry, never mind filo!

My cheats are also tinned beans and pulses, jarred tom yam paste, Mae ploy thai curry pastes and most shamefully - tinned corned beef (occasionaly used along with the tinned beans to make my famous storecupboard chili, which is probably enough to get me banned from the state of Texas for life...)

Tinned corned beef in chili? Hanging's too good for you, podner! :shock:

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Boxes of cake mix which I doctor and use to make birthday cakes (e.g. more Barbie cakes that I care to admit to) for friends' children.  In my defense, a) I can't see wasting "real" cake on a group of 5 year old girls who are already hopped up on frosting and soda and b) I have a very hard time getting "real" cakes to rise consistently (maybe the new stove will help) and I'm usually very pressed for time.

I completely agree with using a boxed cake in an instance like this. Personally, I'm not made of money, and I've also got limited time... why would I waste a really good, made-from-scratch cake on somebody who can't appreciate it? I know, I know, that makes me a bad foodie, but really... especially since you doctor them, I feel it's perfectly acceptable. (And my own confession: I have a few family members who prefer cake mix cakes. I found this out on accident when I had very little time and grabbed a box mix and added some pudding mix. They always compliment me on how much better cakes "made from scratch" are and how "it tastes just like the cakes I remember from my childhood". These are people who think Costco cakes taste great, so they get cake from a mix. Give 'em what they like, I suppose.)

Misa

Sweet Misa

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Oh hey, I forgot one, this one's thanks to Mom! She has three wonderful cake recipes she uses for large receptions and things, a very moist chocolate cake, a marsala cake and a cream sherry cake.

All three come out of boxes.

I defy you to tell the difference.

K

Basil endive parmesan shrimp live

Lobster hamster worchester muenster

Caviar radicchio snow pea scampi

Roquefort meat squirt blue beef red alert

Pork hocs side flank cantaloupe sheep shanks

Provolone flatbread goat's head soup

Gruyere cheese angelhair please

And a vichyssoise and a cabbage and a crawfish claws.

--"Johnny Saucep'n," by Moxy Früvous

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Wow. I'm in awe.

My name is Linda and I thought it was just horrible when, with about 24 hours notice, I prepared these cocktail snacks for friends:

A bowl of Trader Joe's chili lime peanuts that had been opened in the cupboard for a couple of months.

Something I ate in Ohio once called crabgrass: saute onion in a stick of butter. Add a box of frozen chopped spinach that has been thawed. Add a can of crab meat from Costco. Serve on Triscuits.

I did go through the Triscuits and put only the nice, whole squares into the bowl. I did not serve them out of the box.

And the bottle of Belvedere was genuine.

I like to bake nice things. And then I eat them. Then I can bake some more.

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I forgot to mention the cans of Campbell's Cheddar Cheese Soup that live in the pantry for those times that I want an instant cheese sauce. (and by "instant" I mean in less than a minute)

"There are, it has been said, two types of people in the world. There are those who say: this glass is half full. And then there are those who say: this glass is half empty. The world belongs, however, to those who can look at the glass and say: What's up with this glass? Excuse me? Excuse me? This is my glass? I don't think so. My glass was full! And it was a bigger glass!" Terry Pratchett

 

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I forgot to mention the cans of Campbell's Cheddar Cheese Soup that live in the pantry for those times that I want an instant cheese sauce.  (and by "instant" I mean in less than a minute)

Sure helped me when I want something fast and comforting! probably better than a scotch on the rocks! Thanks, Andie! :wink:

Melissa Goodman aka "Gifted Gourmet"

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I have, in my professional career:

--taken NE Clam Chowder and turned it into Linguine White Clam (I was an intern and a dummy, I wonder what the people who ordered it thought of the potato chunks in their pasta??)

--Made Alfredo sauce out of skim milk and Philly cream cheese (and LOTS of parm).

--Made ceviche in the steamer

--Made cheddar cheese popcorn with the flavor packets from kraft Mac N Cheese.

--Got a 50K a year chef job using demi glace made of Knorr Mushroom Gravy base.

And the crowning one (this really works if you're in a pinch):

Steamed off thousands of clams in a dishwasher with the soap cannisters

removed.  Add clam juice back to the opened clams and presto!  Instant clambake for 250.

I'm in awe. I want to meet you. Clams in the dishwasher. Wow!

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Boxes of cake mix which I doctor and use to make birthday cakes (e.g. more Barbie cakes that I care to admit to) for friends' children.  In my defense, a) I can't see wasting "real" cake on a group of 5 year old girls who are already hopped up on frosting and soda and b) I have a very hard time getting "real" cakes to rise consistently (maybe the new stove will help) and I'm usually very pressed for time.

I completely agree with using a boxed cake in an instance like this. Personally, I'm not made of money, and I've also got limited time... why would I waste a really good, made-from-scratch cake on somebody who can't appreciate it? I know, I know, that makes me a bad foodie, but really... especially since you doctor them, I feel it's perfectly acceptable. (And my own confession: I have a few family members who prefer cake mix cakes. I found this out on accident when I had very little time and grabbed a box mix and added some pudding mix. They always compliment me on how much better cakes "made from scratch" are and how "it tastes just like the cakes I remember from my childhood". These are people who think Costco cakes taste great, so they get cake from a mix. Give 'em what they like, I suppose.)

I do completely see the logic in not killing yourself laboring over a real cake for anyone that you suspect will not appreciate it . . . however, I just want to point out that I went the first couple of decades of my life thinking that I didn't like cake, because the only kind I ever got was cake from a mix with premade frosting, or grocery store sheet cakes with crunchy royal frosting.

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Boxes of cake mix which I doctor and use to make birthday cakes (e.g. more Barbie cakes that I care to admit to) for friends' children.  In my defense, a) I can't see wasting "real" cake on a group of 5 year old girls who are already hopped up on frosting and soda and b) I have a very hard time getting "real" cakes to rise consistently (maybe the new stove will help) and I'm usually very pressed for time.

I completely agree with using a boxed cake in an instance like this. Personally, I'm not made of money, and I've also got limited time... why would I waste a really good, made-from-scratch cake on somebody who can't appreciate it? I know, I know, that makes me a bad foodie, but really... especially since you doctor them, I feel it's perfectly acceptable. (And my own confession: I have a few family members who prefer cake mix cakes. I found this out on accident when I had very little time and grabbed a box mix and added some pudding mix. They always compliment me on how much better cakes "made from scratch" are and how "it tastes just like the cakes I remember from my childhood". These are people who think Costco cakes taste great, so they get cake from a mix. Give 'em what they like, I suppose.)

I do completely see the logic in not killing yourself laboring over a real cake for anyone that you suspect will not appreciate it . . . however, I just want to point out that I went the first couple of decades of my life thinking that I didn't like cake, because the only kind I ever got was cake from a mix with premade frosting, or grocery store sheet cakes with crunchy royal frosting.

Yeah, my son won't eat cake b/c that nasty shortening "buttercream" they use on grocery-store cakes is foisted off on children so often (school rules prohibit me from making a "real" cake with "real" frosting and bringing it in to them from my home kitchen)--In my defense, I do make my own frosting, even on cake mix cakes.

Feast then thy heart, for what the heart has had, the hand of no heir shall ever hold.
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Filo

Who makes their own filo?

Store-bought Béchamel (Italy) because it costs 45 cents for half a liter and tastes better than my own. :unsure:

I almost always cook with dry Vermouth instead of white wine.

Often use powdered yeast instead of fresh.

I use 49 cent box wine as marinade because it is lighter and has less tannins and acid.

I toast Indian papads in the toaster.

I buy most of my kitchen tools at the second-hand shops.

I have two Slow-Food aprons and some fancy hand-painted plates with snails on them and a sticker on the back of my car but I let my membership lapse! :shock:

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Canned vegetable soup Pepperage Farms Puff Pastry and leftover chicken...(home made) Chicken pot pie

tracey

grandma used instant mashed potatoes for her top crust

The great thing about barbeque is that when you get hungry 3 hours later....you can lick your fingers

Maxine

Avoid cutting yourself while slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold them while you chop away.

"It is the government's fault, they've eaten everything."

My Webpage

garden state motorcyle association

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I confess...

I've put Stouffers lasagne in my own glass dish to bake it and didn't tell anyone it wasn't homemade.

I do the same thing with cheesecake. I buy it and then put it on a pretty dish.

:unsure:

*sneaking out*

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For almost a year while I was still a beginner in the kitchen and getting comfortable with sauces, I'd serve hollandaise from a jar as my own. I believe I even did it with pesto. Oh, the shame. :sad:

I'm proud to say I've long sinced moved past this era. :)

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I'm curious about the Stouffer's in the Pyrex and the cheesecake on the footed cake plate thing . . . Do you ever worry that your guests know?

I like to bake nice things. And then I eat them. Then I can bake some more.

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While prospecting in the pantry for another item, I came across a couple of jars of 3-bean salad which I keep on hand for stretching salads.

Many years ago I used to dutifully make my own, using mostly canned beans, fresh sliced onions, and an appropriate dressing. However, I discovered the stuff in the jar was as good, if not better than mine.

I also keep a small container of potato flakes, not for mashed potatoes but to use for thickening soups, without having a raw floury taste. Works especially well in potato/leek soup, carrot, squash and corn chowder, without altering the flavor.

"There are, it has been said, two types of people in the world. There are those who say: this glass is half full. And then there are those who say: this glass is half empty. The world belongs, however, to those who can look at the glass and say: What's up with this glass? Excuse me? Excuse me? This is my glass? I don't think so. My glass was full! And it was a bigger glass!" Terry Pratchett

 

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I use Minors Soup bases..(beef and Chkn), And have no apologies for doing it, cause its better than my stock and lots quicker. Kicks up all sorts of stuff the proverbial notch......Beef even makes a nice onion soup...Only problem is the Rest. food supply place stopped selling retail and I have to Mail order it...

Bud

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I use Minors Soup bases..(beef and Chkn), And have no apologies for doing it, cause its better than my stock and lots quicker. Kicks up all sorts of stuff the proverbial notch......Beef even makes a nice onion soup...Only problem is the Rest. food supply place stopped selling retail and I have to Mail order it...

Bud

They sell it at BJs ...maybe at Costco too :unsure:

a dollop in tomato sauce is good too

tracey

The great thing about barbeque is that when you get hungry 3 hours later....you can lick your fingers

Maxine

Avoid cutting yourself while slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold them while you chop away.

"It is the government's fault, they've eaten everything."

My Webpage

garden state motorcyle association

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