China, silver, crystal, and the table . . .

[Fat Guy]

In fine-dining restaurants (not to mention all restaurants, if not to as great an extent) quite a bit of attention is paid to the appearance of food, both the way a serving is laid out on a plate and the choice of china, silver, crystal, table linens, etc.

Home cooks seem not to pay as much attention to these matters. I'm wondering where eGullet people stand in terms of how they plate food and set the table.

Most of us behave differently when alone, with nuclear family, and with invited guests at varying levels of formality. So much of this is either/or:

When you arrange food on a plate, do you have aesthetic considerations in mind or do you just do whatever fits or seems intuitive? Do you garnish your plates, create designs with sauce, or anything like that?

If you own fine china, silver, and crystal, how often do you use it and for what kinds of occasions? And what kind of stuff do you own?

How often do you use a tablecloth? Placemats? Nothing?

What kind of napkins do you use?

[snowangel]

In our house, kids do the plating. We have a beautiful arts and crafts round table, with beautiful (refinished by me) antique (inherited from great grandparents) table. Since I have kids, we have plain, white Correlle (sp?) dishes. They are lightweight, and unadorned.

I almost always use wine glasses (cheap red wine ones) because it makes the table look nice and everyone feel special). Even for milk.

Diana is in charge of figuring our which garnishes look appropriate. While I plate, Peter garnishes. Heidi (our daughter with disabilities) looks approvingly. Paul makes sure everything else is in order -- including music.

I insist on family dinner every night, and want to make it something that everyone can look forward to -- the food may be simple, but presentation can compensate. After all, shouldn't we all put the most effort into those we love the most?

On a good day, everyone but me clears the table and loads the dishwasher while I finish a glass of wine (or milk).

[Peter B Wolf]

In our home it is always nicely set. But sort of informal.

Always tablecloth – usually an off-white or pastel. And white cloth napkins, we have at least three dozen which I inherited from my parents. Silverware is just that – silver. My parents gave us at our wedding a set of eight, with serving utensils, cake forks, fish forks & knives, salad forks, soup spoons and extra smaller teaspoons. Then I inherited lots of loose silverware from my parents, plus my wife from her grandmother additional sterling, even tiny Espresso spoons and long icetea spoons. And since we have it, why not use it daily? Daily china is “Pickard Crescent” an off white with platinum edge. Sundays and when guests come, we use Grandmother’s “Limoges Theodore Haviland”. This may sound nuts, but for afternoon tea, or for that matter any other teatime, we have about a dozen or so not matching fine bone chine teacups and saucers and cakeplates, gotten over the times in Europe. Afternoon coffee and cake or cookies, (a German tradition) is served from either one set of “Hutschenreuther Blue Onion” design or from a set “Wedgewood Kutani Crane” design. We also have eight sets of original Italian thick Espresso cups and half a dozen or so tiny “Mocca” cups. Glassware is decent crystal, some “Riedel”, other juice and water glasses. Wineglasses do not get much use in our house, since neither one of us drinks any alcoholic beverages. So we have them just for guests. All the above gets used, maybe not everything daily, but we don’t use any plastic nor paper goods. Life is too short to not to enjoy it. And the uses of these utensils give us great pleasure.

Breakfast is usually only cereal with fruit, yogurt and plenty good strong coffee. Twice a week we splurge with bagels, rolls, or toast with various confitures, jellies, jams and marmelades and honey.

Lunch is our Main meal; you might want to call it Dinner. Our daughter sets the table with the necessary utensils and glasses for juice or water as a beverage. Whatever gets cooked, I usually plan the night before, is always served “family style” in serving bowls and platters, if it’s a roast, I carve at table. Everyone helps himself or herself. We always eat together, and no one will start unless all are seated. Phone calls are ignored!!

Evening meal, possibly a light soup, some cottage cheese with fruit, or some cold cuts and cheeses with different types of bread. That’s basically it, life goes on. “eGullet” is waiting to be read and commented on.

[Fat Guy]

We operate at three levels of formality (not counting eating-over-the-kitchen-sink, eating-in-front-of-the-television, eating-while-wandering-around-the-apartment, and eating-while-working-on-the-computer).

Everyday stuff when we're alone is greenish ash-glazed stoneware made by a woman up in Rockland County. We were able to specify all the parameters so the plates are nice and big, the bowls are the shape and size we like, the salad plates are actually big enough to hold a salad, etc. My only regret is that we bothered to buy cups because who the heck wants to drink out of a stoneware cup? We use our basic crap Retroneu stainless, paper napkins (the Bounty ones are awesome), and no table covering -- except coasters. For non-wine drinks we use heavy tumblers but for wine we always use our Baccarat or Spiegelau crystal stems. In terms of presentation we always try to make food look nice on the plate. If I'm cooking with herbs I always reserve some of those herbs for use as a garnish, for example. And if there's a sauce I usually ring the plate with it or something.

For friends who are hanging out and happen to stay for a meal we use some English stuff that's heavyweight and has a wheat pattern on it. Depending on our mood we might use a tablecloth or some placemats (we have a fairly interesting collection). Most other elements remain the same.

For pre-planned entertaining we use old stuff. All our china and silver and much of our crystal is antique and most has gold accents, so while I'd love to use it every day I don't feel that it can stand up to the abuse of dishwashers and such. Actually there would be no problem using the silver every day but I actually prefer the modern stainless shapes -- though I do like holding the silver. We have multiple china patterns but all have cobalt and gold as the unifying colors, so we do a lot of unusual mix and match and also supplement with yellow etched glass (both plates and goblets). Tablecloths, candlesticks, placecard holders, salt shakers, all these things are antique so it can be quite a nice table if we invest the time (which is mostly in the cleanup phase).

[Wilfrid]

I am obsessive about this to the degree time allows. I grew up in a house where all the nice things, including the entire dining room, were saved up for special occasions. It's a common British trait, probably specific to a certain class which I hesitate to define. I resolved, as Peter said above, that life is too short for such inhibitions.

I try to set a formal dinner table every night we eat at home. Often, only I show up to the meal (no, I don't set extra places anyway, I'm not quite that barmy). I am currently inhibited by a grasping toddler, and one concession I have made is to abandon table cloths for the time being. I used to lay an ordinary white linen cloth every evening.

Instead, I am using some (mock-)tapestry covers. These are not table mats as such. You find them in lots of stores on Fifth and Broadway - knockoffs of pieces of French-style tapestry with pictures of cowherds or lords and ladies. Do you know what I mean?

Anyway, there's a size about 12 inches by 12 inches which serves as the main place cover, and there's a smaller size which can be placed on the side for bottles and glasses. Wine bottle is always placed in a polished silver coaster. I use some sturdy French wine glasses for everyday use, and save the elegant fragile stuff for guests.

Plain silver flatware from Bloomingdale's. Big, solid white dishes from Williams and Sonoma - their brasserie line. For guests, we initially set the table with some nice Spode plates - game bird designs - and then also use those for one of the courses. After trying various fancy options, we settled for pepper and salt in very traditional shakers with dimpled glass and silver tops. You understand, I am going for a very traditional, even stuffy look here.

Napkins. I always use linen napkins, but my current selection is boring. I have been looking longingly at the varieties available in the Vintage wine store in Soho. I also came across a store in Soho last week which offered a range of tableware by a specific name designer - and dammit, the name is escaping me. Male - it's the name of the store, if you see what I mean.

What do you all think about candles? Now the heat has eased, I am using harvest candles with grape designs from Illuminations. I have a dilemma there. I like to eat by candlelight, but if I'm alone I need electric light to read. Difficult one.

A second-hand, six seater wooden table has served us well for a few years, but we plan to buy a new one next year. Pierre Deux on Madison had a cherrywood table I had to be dragged away from weeping, but it was round, and I do find that round tables cut into my embonpoint somewhat. Anyway, whatever we get will be wooden and sturdy.

If I had an hour to spare, I'd probably dress for dinner too. Okay, I'll come quietly, officer.

[CathyL]

I have a weakness for beautiful tableware and indulged it when I was making big bucks. For anyone in Manhattan who is similarly afflicted and salaried, I recommend Avventura on 82nd and Amsterdam.

Plain white plates are supposed to set food off best, but ho-hum. My everyday/company china ('Basketmaker' from LS Collection) has a stylized Native American design around the rim. For dinners outside, I have Japanese stoneware plates in a beautiful blue-green.

Tableware is brushed stainless in a modern design. For grand dinners I bring out my grandmother's Grand Baroque sterling, and a motley collection of serving pieces from my mother-in-law's Dickensian shop in Philadelphia.

Murano wineglasses: stubby goblets for reds, and a gorgeous ocean-blue for whites. I know the latter is a no-no, but just looking at these glasses makes me happy.

I have a lot of serving bowls and platters in various shapes and colors, many picked up at crafts fairs. Deciding what to serve on which is part of the pleasure of entertaining, for me. I always serve family style.

Napkins are plain black linen; I have a set of napkin rings shaped like suns and moons, which little kids find enthralling for some reason. No tablecloth - the dining room table is a metal tubing/glass topped thingy. Our late bulldog made an annoying sport out of leaping up from under, trying to snatch napkins - she didn't seem to mind smacking her face on the glass.

[Fat Guy]

What do you all think about candles?

We're sort of limited by our candlesticks, which are massive, silver, and ornate and therefore only look right with standard tapers. My wife's great grandparents brought them over from Russia and they fell to us when we got married, so we're pretty loyal to them as our only candle-holding devices for the table.

[Fat Guy]

Our late bulldog made an annoying sport out of leaping up from under, trying to snatch napkins - she didn't seem to mind smacking her face on the glass.

Yes, they do seem to have trouble with the concept of "hard air."

[g.johnson]

I grew up in a house where all the nice things, including the entire dining room, were saved up for special occasions.  It's a common British trait, probably specific to a certain class which I hesitate to define.

Oh the temptation...

[rich]

Here goes:

Silverware - Three sets - One is goldware used only with a more formal setting (never sees a dishwasher). The other is Mikasa SS - very unique pattern used with slightly less formal settings or for brunches. The third is from Pflatzgraff - extremely unique design - used for informal gatherings when I'm serving on he counter.

Glassware - Lismore pattern of Waterford for formal settings (never sees the dishwasher). The same wine glasses as Tabla for more infomal. Have several sets of wine tasting glasses of varying shapes for everyday. Decanters are very important, have about 10 designs, three are Waterford. Always keep at least 4 beer mugs (Rolling Rock) in freezer for people who want beer before dinner (especially in summer).

Linens - always use linen or cotton napkins. Have several pastel shades to match place mats. Purchased 100 formal off-white napkins from British Airways - the type they use in first class (even has a button hole). Since the dining table is glass, we only use tablecloths for buffets. Otherwise place mats. Have several types from casual to formal.

Dinnerware - three sets. Formal is the Mikasa Black and Gold to match the goldware. Less formal is the American Bistro setting - very colorful, less formal. The everyday plates are simple glass. Always use chargers in formal setting - have white china with gold trim or gold plated. In addition, I own several sets of soup bowls and appetizer dishes. Sometimes I use these with the formal set as an eclectic change. My favorite are the red/orange ceramic triangle appetizer plates from Spain - purchased these at Dean & Deluca. For soup, my favorite are the ceramic individual hand-made bowls purchased from Chalet Suzanne in Lake Worth, Florida. Always chilled plates for Caesar salads - some others, especially if warm dressing (like the contrast).

Table setting - always use at least three forks and dessert spoon in setting, use additional chilled SS fork for salads. In formal setting, each guest has own salt dish. Red wines are decanted and bottle left on wine tray with cork. White wine is opened just before serving and place on tray. I have two wine coolers, but they are rarely used except for sparkling/champagne. Own about 10 pepper mills with different types of pepper and blends. I normally grind for my guests and leave mill(s) - no more than two - on the table. Always use napkin rings. Place cards during formal dining only.

Always use Waterford Champagne glasses and different HD dishes/forks and napkins before dinner. Caviar is served in a chilled dish or in coated SS cups set into a piece of wine barrel wood that is the shape of a quarter moon. Snails are served in individual heavy aluminum dishes - prefer to ceramic.

Dessert & Cheese - Dessert is served on square ceramic 'napkin' plates, produced by Department 56 - very unique design and shape. Cheese is served on Maplewood (cut from a larger piece by Home Depot) or on a large Ceramic Tile. Normally with pears, finely chopped figs, olive tapanade and glazed/spiced nuts. I have several individual cheese plates to choose.

They are smaller than dinner dishes, but larger than HD dishes. Green long-stemmed German Hock glasses are used for dessert wines.

Dinner - I always garnish and arrange food for guests and put extra helpings on table or sideboard. I decorate plates with herbs or sauces and normally a large crouton with appropriate soup. Normally serve some type of "intermezzo" with fomal dinners. Frozen, coated grapes work well.

After dinner - always offer after dinner drinks in appropriate glasses. My favorite are the snifters with glass straws as part of the bowl. Most of my after dinners are in decanters that can be brought to the table or some people enjoy sitting at the bar.

WE DO NOT ALLOW SMOKING IN THE HOUSE. But if a guest must, they are welcome to use the terrace. (Yes, I own one ashtray.)

[Emma]

Forgive me for jumping to conclusions, but does everyone here have a dishwasher except me!? Yikes. I confess that my table is most often set with that "rinse and reuse" heavy-duty type of paper product that I use and then throw away. If I were going to rinse it, I'd just use my regular dishes. Altho I do try to plate each paperplate as if it were the finest of fine china.

And I do feel guilt over the landfills.....

[rich]

Forgive me for jumping to conclusions, but does everyone here have a dishwasher except me!?

To me it's the single most important kitchen invention in the last 40 years. If there were no dishwashers, I would never entertain.

[Varmint]

Our dining room table was designed by my wife's father and is a beautiful walnut piece, seating 14. We don't want to cover it up too much (although we recently put a big piece of glass on it for long term protection). We do try to add lots of color to the table. We always use placemats and cloth napkins, often of multiple colors. Our favorite is green placemats with purple napkins (and vice-versa). We've been given or have inherited probably 30 different types of napkins/placemats.

Our formal china is hardly formal: Wedgwood Solar, which is a somewhat funky looking all white setting. I really don't like serving food on anything other than white. Our flatware is plain old stainless Retroneu -- for some reason, I don't like silver. I actually feel like I can taste the silver (and we have a 24 person setting of my wife's great, great grandmother's silver). Our glassware is simple Orrefors, which holds up well.

I generally plate everything at the kitchen counter. Garnishing is generally simple with herbs, basic reductions. I'll break out a squeeze bottle every once in awhile just for effect.

There are times when I don't plate, and that's usually for family dinners or dishes that I know people will want additional helpings. In that case, we'll do things family style, and I have a boatload of North Carolina made pottery. I'm very much into pottery as functional art, and we can get quite a lot of high quality (and colorful) stuff down here.

[Fat Guy]

Forgive me for jumping to conclusions, but does everyone here have a dishwasher except me!?

We lived for about 7 years without one and got one when we renovated the kitchen. Having lived both ways, I can testify that not having a dishwasher is a bad thing. Unless your lease forbids it or your kitchen space can't handle one, it's well worth the few hundred dollars. We did the heavy-duty paper plates for everyday use but it's so much more satisfying to eat off real plates. Plus the dishwasher gets stuff much cleaner than hand-washing. And remember you can put pots and pans in the dishwasher too.

[Priscilla]

Two earlier discussions touched on this, for those interested. This one on flatware, and this one for dishware.

I like to have everything that's supposed to be on the table on the table. Sea salt in a shaker and pepper in a mill. Pink taper candles for every day, in holders low enough for conversation. Cloth napkins.

Platters and bowls, usually, although there are some dishes that get plated for service. I do like the communal symbology of platters and bowls.

Lots of inexpensive French wine glasses, like to have lots because even though they are sturdy as can be they seem to get very hard wear (!).

Tablecloths sometimes, for more formal occasions e.g., but just the plain butcher-block tabletop most of the time.

[bushey]

I was just thinking about table settings last weekend when getting ready for our holiday evening dinner. I would love to set a beautiful table with matching china and great flatware but these items never seem to make it to the top of the priority list. Though I've gone through the wedding thing twice, I never registered for china or crystal and now That I would love to use it the price seems daunting (okay, my taste has gotten more expensive, what can I say?)

The joke in our household is that my husband inherited china service for six from his first marriage. In a pattern I hate (Minton Grasmere). They even split the serving pieces 50-50. Note to self: list the china on eBay. When we host family dinners I use a set of glass dishes from Corning so at least we all have the same dishes. For a small gathering I'll use the (dreaded) china. Every so often I fantasize about taking a fistful of cash and hitting the Brimfield fair to find service for at least 16 in mismatched but matching (if you know what I mean) antique china.

My biggest problem is tablecloths. How do you get them really clean? Do most folks send the linens out to the cleaners or launder at home? I haven't yet found stain resistant cloths that are attractive and truly resist stains

[Rail Paul]

Tableware - I've purchased 2 or 4 piece place settings from Dansk (Tropez, Tuscany, etc - lots of color and variety) and pfaltzgraff (mostly solids in rust, cobalt, etc) and selecting what goes best with the food offered. Prob have ten different combinations. I like the idea of choosing from a range of shapes and colors to accent the food. Everyday flatware from Dansk.

We generally eat dinner on the deck from May thru October, so a quick tablecloth, hurricane lamp candles, and Flemington Glass wine glasses are fine for just us, or close friends. During the winter, we still cook outside, but eat in the dining room, with a tablecloth, and usually with real candles.

For formal stuff, we have sets of lenox charleston and lenox solitaire china. We were in Ireland this past week. Dee purchased candlesticks, white and red wine glasses from Tipperary Crystal, and other glasses from Waterford. The louise kennedy designs at Tipperary are very squared, contrasting with the more detailed cut of waterford. These will prob be formal items for us, bouncing the currently good waterford stemware down to occasional use.

[Fat Guy]

The antique mismatched-but-matched strategy, combined with a ton of patience, is how we've acquired nice china within our budgetary limitations. Once you pick a unifying theme, if you keep your eyes out it's just a matter of time before it all comes together. We started off with 7 Johnson Bros. "Pareek" dinner plates (you save big if you buy odd-numbered sets) and are now up to about 20. We scored 11 more at an auction in Connecticut and picked up a couple here and there as single pieces. They've got a large cobalt band and a bunch of gold and also some smaller designs, so we're always looking for cobalt-and-gold stuff. Over time we've acquired a set of service plates with a white middle and a cobalt-and-gold border, some cobalt crystal, little salt dishes in cobalt and silver, and so on. We've even found a few modern pieces that don't clash with the old stuff -- something about the richness of the blue holds it all together. And we use, for example, small cobalt glass side plates as bread plates, and also some gold-yellow etched glass plates, bowls, and goblets -- and those are really cheap, yet they look good in the overall scheme of things. It's a mishmash but it all looks surprisingly coordinated.

[Varmint]

OK, time for a pet peeve here. How many people use tall candlesticks in the middle of their table? Or large floral arrangements? I absolutely despise it when there's a large object sitting in the middle of the table that prevents people from seeing the person across the way. We have handmade candlesticks that are 8 inches tall and each holds about 4 of those squatty little tealight candles.

Whenever we go to a restaurant with tall candles or floral arrangements, we ask the waiter to remove them right away. Generally, we get a sympathetic response, as they recognize how stupid they are, too.

[Fat Guy]

I totally agree. We never put tall floral arrangements on the table -- at most we'll do a few bud vases. For candlesticks we set the table with them and remove them to the fireplace mantle when it's time to eat.

[Priscilla]

Once you pick a unifying theme, if you keep your eyes out it's just a matter of time before it all comes together.

I have done this over time on a pink theme, (also on a certain-types-of-green tangent). A great way to have decent, interesting tableware in the numbers you need, formal or everyday or whatever.

[Wilfrid]

I agree with you, Varmint. We might have a floral display (okay, flowers) in the middle of the table to greet our guests. It looks cheery. But we remove it when we begin serving.

Candlesticks - We have various different shapes and sizes. I am currently using the flat, silver holders from Illuminations - I am sure there's a proper name for them but I can't find them even ontheir web-site.

Incidentally, I think candles are fine for romantic dinners for two (or indeed one ), but with guests we have found that sufficient candles to provide light create excessive heat.

I didn't respond to the question about plating food decoratively. Yes, I am compulsive about this too. I have been known to do it (in fact, I always do it) even at buffets, and certainly I do it at home, and I try to use sauces, herbs and spices to add colour to the plate. This is why I use the big white plates and bowls.

By the way, I am stuck on the name of an expensive French tableware store on Broadway - two names - like something & Bosch? Can anyone help me?

[Wilfrid]

I grew up in a house where all the nice things, including the entire dining room, were saved up for special occasions.  It's a common British trait, probably specific to a certain class which I hesitate to define.

Oh the temptation...

I know. But whenever I suggest that my family background is thus, I am never believed. So I've given up.

[Priscilla]

Villeroy & Boch. Luxembourgian, depuis 17- or 16-something. Manufactured my big old green marble chargers.

Not to slight Bosch, however, who made my dishwasher.

[Wilfrid]

Ta. That's why my search wasn't working. I got my sturdy French wine glasses there. Pricey.