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Fresser

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Everything posted by Fresser

  1. My wacky Moroccan rabbi eats raw garlic. He chops up garlic cloves, mixes them with some olive oil and shmears it on a slice of raw bread. He and his wife have (at last count) nine children, so virility is not a problem here.
  2. Color me clueless, Milagai--I too have no idea what this means. There is a Cafe Borgia in the south Chicago suburbs that serves wonderful Italian food.
  3. I stopped at Dunkie Donuts the other morning for my morning coffee and saw an advertisement for their latest concoction: the Berry Berry donut. Not being fully caffeinated yet (but typically sardonic), I thought to myself: Wonderful. A donut that causes thiamine deficiency. A quick search on Google revealed that the thiamine-related disease is actually spelled beriberi--hardly settling for nutritionists who spy this sign on their morning coffee jaunts. Sininster semantics aside, I have to wonder how this blooper made its way past the Dunkie marketing department. There must be others out there...
  4. Glad I could help, Kate! You need to follow the glycemic index. Some carbohydrates are absorbed MUCH more slowly into the bloodstream than others, and thus don't cause the glucose spike that you've been experiencing.
  5. Mama Fresser tells me that during the Depression, cash-strapped mothers would scrape together whatever food they could find and serve it to their hungry kids. To wardoff any kvetching over that day's meal, mothers would admonish their little crumb-crunchers, "You'll eat it and you'll like it!" Now Mama Fresser never employed this tactic with me, as I grew up in the '70's surrounded by an abundance of Mama's tasty cooking. But I have taken the eat-it-and-like-it motto to heart as I've adjusted to being diabetic. Shortly after I started taking oral insulin, I suffered from hypoglycemia and the attendant diabetic shakes (think delirium tremens minus the alcohol). To combat this, my doctor suggested that I try eating oatmeal for breakfast to stabilize my blood sugars. Now for someone who grew up eating breakfast cereal two or three times a day, I never liked oatmeal. To me, oatmeal resembled not so much a hot breakfast cereal as syrupy gruel. But I decided to make friends with the smiling, white-haired Quaker on the front of the box and took home a canister of oats. My first bowl of oatmeal had the consistency of quick-drying cement. So I plunged in my spoon and stood it upright like Admiral Fresser conquering the North Oat Pole. "Yummy. Now what?" I thought as I reached for some ground cinnamon to spice up the barren tasteland that sat in front of me. I soon discovered that oatmeal, like grits, is bland by itself by makes a nutritious base for other toppings. So I started chopping in bananas, pineapple and even sugar-free chocolate chip cookies to make a more savory cereal. Now oatmeal is my favorite breakfast food and a healthy one at that. But I never would have tried it had my doctor not told me to eat it. Similarly, I've become the Happy Herbivore as I chomp on vegetables to satisfy my color and texture cravings. Pre-diabetes, I preferred fruits to the cruncy broccoli spear, but now I eat fruit in more modest amounts, diverting my attention instead to the Leafy Green Forest of my produce market. Vegetables have the same toothsome crunch and eye-appeal of fresh fruit, yet they are mostly sugar-free and thus are the perfect noshing food. If you had told me ten years ago that one day, I'd nuke an entire bag of frozen vegetables and happily wolf it down, I would have proclaimed you to be meshugee. But to control my blood sugars, I had to change the way I eat. So I figured out I might was well enjoy it. This of course begs the question: if I now enjoy healthy foods out of necessity, do I dislike candy and other verboten foods? To a point, yes. The mere sight of a Boston kreme donut gives me the hives. Not so much because I dislike it, but because I know that if I DID eat it, I'd become sick immediately. So sweets present little-to-notemptation for me. And that's a good thing, given that Mama Fresser and I live right across the street from a Dunkin' Donuts. I guess this is my diet's way of manifesting itself in a way that's more psychologically palatable, pardon the pun. In other words, if I have to eat it anyway, I might as well enjoy it.
  6. At many a Heartland dinner, I was proud to serve as Big Brother and punching-bag for Ronnie's munchkin Lucas. Nobody can smoke a brisket like Ronnie.
  7. Lately I'm seeing my diabetes as a great indicator of when I need to eat. I can handle blood sugars in the 50's before I get violently ill, but if my moods ever start to swing, I check my sugars and eat something if my below glucose reads below 90 or so.
  8. I would be a plate of livers. Organ meats for an organ-grinderesque kind of guy. Hemoglobin-enhancing iron in liver enhances circulation--kind of like when I induce uproarious laughter in our devoted readers.
  9. Stench from my sardine stash just sent a pregnant co-worker fleeing outside in search of fresh air. So I'm now forbidden to eat my beloved little fishies at work.
  10. Try roasting several garlic cloves and mixing them into the grits with some chives added for color. Yummy!
  11. I'll be right over, Suzi!! Often will I soothe the women at work with elephantine Hershey bars and other sweets. Should I load up Philly cheesecake filling too?
  12. You'd need a mighty sharp knife to accomplish this, Fabby! Might I interest you in the square-root-of-negative-one pieces of banana?
  13. Good for you, Nikki! People who dump on waitstaff think the world is here to kiss their tuchis. Maybe it's just my grateful outlook on life, but I'm HAPPY when someone brings me a meal, whether he or she is getting paid to do so or not.
  14. I wonder if eG's own Nightscotsman--who himself is a pastry chef at the Bellagio--has worked with Chef Jeff.
  15. I'm still not getting the picture... how would you have eaten a banana? ← Animus meminisse horret.
  16. This sounds like a pudding skin to me.
  17. I can see House M.D. now: So the little miscreant ingested some poison and we can't find a stomach pump? Bury your noggin in this Kimchee Can, kid, and BREATHE!!!
  18. Was one of his favorite dishes Green Bean Casserole? ← There ya go stereotyping us again, Sandy! (munches on crackers and white bread) The women I've dated have had pretty eclectic tastes when it comes to food. No suprise, I guess--who wants to dine with a fussbudget?
  19. Oy! Nu, so we can't get a mogen david bun or something??
  20. Woudn't the Jewish brunch favorite of lox and bagels fit the bill here?
  21. Now that The Fressermobile is officially paid-off, I simply MUST road-trip to the East Coast and serve as the Cholesterol Caravan as Pizza Clubbers make their rounds. My PT Cruiser even has a nifty tailgating shelf that will support pizza and libations. I can seat four comfortably, and remember: KatieLoeb calls shotgun!
  22. Has anyone ever seen grits on the menu at a Northern restaurant? International House of Pancakes (IHOP) is pretty popular up here, but all they ever sling at you with your eggs is hash browns.
  23. Moo Jew Gai Pan: Chinese fusion dish served at kosher restaurants.
  24. Peeking Duck: Eyeballing the poultry dish served at the adjacent table. Not to be confused with I_Call_the_Duck.
  25. I'm a card-carrying member-of-the-Tribe, so naturally I like Chinese food. Also, I'm a HUGE fan of Greek cuisine. All the garlic and lemon in that cuisine just tantalize me so. Jews as a rule like to eat, but I'm not sure we favor one cuisine to the exclusion of others.
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