camp_dick

Amused to note, listed two topics below this thread at the mo: Marmite, can't stop eating the stuff...

Never mind Gordo Walnuts and Dat Fuck, what your friend needs to know is that London boasts the finest Indian restaurants in the world and, living near Marble Arch, she's going to become familiar with the bottom of Edgware Road, which is basically Arabian. kitwilliams mentioned Ranoush, which is all well and good (I prefer Beirut, myself) but it's just a minor link in the mighty Maroush chain, which serves very decent Lebanese food from various outlets (and they even have a deli, almost next door to Ranoush). I can't really recommend any Indian places around there, but I'm sure they exist. Personally, I think Baker & Spice is the most pretentious and overpriced concept in the known world and cordially detest the place. In fact, stay well away from self-consciously foodie enclaves such as Marylebone High St or Clifton Road altogether. For fish and chips, you don't need to go to Wandsworth when you're living near the Seashell@ Lisson Grove. Drinks wise, students have subsidised bars which are bound to be a lot cheaper than elsewhere in Central London. Busaba - a Thai style version of wagamama - has a branch on Store St, not far from the ULU on Mallet St.

Today I noticed Walnut's ugly mug blown up big in the window of Threshers and the question occurred to me, can that greedy twat stoop any lower?

Geezer (is it Mr Fenwick?) looks a decade younger in one of those pics (the one in the car park with his suppliers).

Caught the repeat last night. Gordo Walnuts 'fuck' quotient does appear to have gone through the fucking roof. Landlord reminded me of wassisname, the blind geezer who used to be Home Secretary, the one who dallied with - or as Walnuts might say, 'fucked' - that Kim Quim. I notice that no one else has had the decency to hyperlink the Campaign For Real Gravy, but check it out: apparently, Delia Smith is Walnuts' arch-nemesis! There's a TV show I'd watch: 'Gers vs. Canaries, a goalless draw? "Fuck football, Delia, let's wrestle. Naked. In gravy." Ohh, gotta log off...

I'm sure the technology has moved on, but didn't the Roux bros have a place in Finsbury Circus back in the 1980s that served sous vide dishes prepared in a satellite kitchen? (Yes I DO mean it was floating in outer space). Rouxl Britannia, was it??

You're so right! what Heston obviously needs is a diminutive sidekick, Hervé Vichyssoise perhaps? Oh, and a decent hat like Ricardo Monteban.

That's not exactly how Heston tells it himself you sarky clart.

One of those oxymoronic wankers?I'm intrigued by Heston's face furniture: those slightly aerodynamic goggles that simultaneously suggest extreme sports and potentially explosive lab work.

Didn't you do it in order to fill a column in the Sunday paper? If your motive was purely altruistic, for the sake of humanity, I beseech you to share your knowledge!

D'you mean the Bavarian Beerhouse on City Road?

The Beer Acadmey is an educational trust fronted by the ebullient PR guy, Rupert Ponsonby, who can no doubt direct you (there's a phone no.) Otherwise, Brew Wharf looks promising.

WTF?MON, good luck over there. I wouldn't want to be in your boots for all the opium in the world. As others have said, Bray is an oasis of haute cuisine within easy taxi distance of Heathrow, but you'll need to book at either the Waterside or the Fat Duck. Alternatively, you can easily get into central London from Thiefrow and might want to try Le Gavroche or any of the G.Ramsay establishments.

As Sir Matthew of Fortesque says: 'A pub can hardly call itself a pub any more without its menu of chilli-grilled squid, grilled tuna, damned grilled goat's cheese, Old Spot sausages, steak and chips, tiramisu and sticky toffee pudding. There are sub-British, cod-Continental, trashy-Thai. Out has gone real food cooked by real chefs with real skills. In have come cloned dishes from identikit menus produced to a formula by scarcely trained - what? Cooks? Chefs? Hardly. I'm not sure there is a classification for the people currently working in many gastropub kitchens any more. Cooking has been reduced to the lowest common denominator. Technology, centralised production, commercial homogenisation have taken over from style, class, taste and personality'

There ain't no Kenyan food in Southall. The Anand family, who run The Brilliant came to Southall from Kenya in 1957, but are of Punjabi origin.