The assist

[Kent Wang]

In Chinese cuisine, food is served "family style", i.e. dishes are shared by all. Sometimes when picking up a piece of, say fish, from a serving dish the piece does not break off and one needs the assistance of another pair of chopsticks to help separate the piece.

In such cases, whoever is sitting nearest is expected to lend a hand, and sometimes with particularly tricky situations a three-way assist is required. Another common case is flipping a fish, which usually requires two people.

Westerners may find this practice distasteful but I think it strengthens relationships -- like a team-building exercise, if you will. I wonder if it may also considered uncouth in very formal dining situations in China.

[Chris Amirault]

I can't really imagine any of the Westerners I know finding it distasteful! Folks raised in small communities that have supported church suppers and neighborhood potlucks are certainly familiar with this, as are people who grew up in large families. My dad's mother (of ten children) certainly never plated anything in the kitchen!

[racheld]

It sounds charming and friendly and very comfortable. All of which add to the enjoyment of any event, especially when there's FOOD.

Chris and I are quite adept with chopsticks, and always find ourselves swapping little smitches and tastes back and forth, and when a piece is too big for a bite, we do the "assist" without thinking. He's even ambi-stick-strous, having broken a shoulder several years ago. While it was healing, he ate quite neatly left-handed.

[Lilija]

I think it's great, too. Something we do in our family without thinking about it much. Right up there with holding the bowl, so your neighbor can dish from it, before passing it, at the table. That's the kind of thing that family meals are all about.

[rooftop1000]

Last night 7 of us went through 15 plates of food in a Chinese restaurant and I will say there were chopsticks flying everywhere. And th eoccasional spoon and fingers too. Pardon my reach and spin that shrimp back my way.

Tracey

[Kent Wang]

There is a relevant Buddhist story about the difference between heaven and hell. Here is one retelling.

I first read it in a book which had two great illustrations of the story, but, alas, I wasn't able to find these images with a quick Google search.

[jayt90]

No one has mentioned

"NO DOUBLE DIPPING!!"

And that particular cultural phenomenon is the reason we might not enjoy these meals.

It is recent, and won't be wiped out overnIght, as long as there is a chance of disease spreading.

I have heard 'No D.D. ' in my workplace lunchroom for several years, and it definitely slows things down.

[feedmec00kies]

No one has mentioned

"NO DOUBLE DIPPING!!"

And that particular cultural phenomenon is the reason we might not enjoy these meals.

It is recent, and won't be wiped out overnIght, as long as there is a chance of disease spreading.

I have heard 'No D.D. ' in my workplace lunchroom for several years, and it definitely slows things down.

←

Yeah, I'm almost certain that these table practices only became distasteful culturally after Westerners discovered ::gasp:: disease! To think, Europeans used to think that bathing and changing underwear daily was weird!

If I'm with friends, we usually establish double dipping as OK, since we'd usually let each other try something from each other's glasses as well.

As for the chopstick thing, when I was little my mom told us to flip our chopsticks around to the "wrong" end to take things from common plates and assist: probably a synthesis of Chinese and Western table manners/culture.

I also think it's amusing that my Jewish dad prefers to use chopsticks when he makes salad and is mixing in the dressing! He insists there is no tool or utensil better suited.

Edited August 19, 2007 by feedmec00kies (log)